it because he said that my opiate receptors are not working. It sounds ridiculous doesn't it? I found an addiction psychiatrist a couple of months ago when I was down to 2 mgs. of subutex (same thing as suboxone without the naloxone in it). She had me admitted to the hospital immediately and they took me off of the subutex cold turkey and gave me neurontin and clonidine to help me with the withdrawls but I have never been so sick in all my life. I was in the hospital for 11 days and didn't get out of bed for 8 (only to use the bathroom). They released me after 11 days and had me start a day program for depression/anxiety the next day. I was happy to be home but still very sick and my family was supportive but didn't realize how sick I still was. The doctor told me to do things like go food shopping with my husband, go to dinner with my family, etc., plus it was Thanksgiving and Christmas was right around the corner and there were a lot of birthdays in my family and I had to to out to dinner to celebrate. I was home for 5 days and so nauseous that I took a suboxone just to see if that was why I was so sick and my nausea went away and I had lots of energy so I got a lot done that day. I promised myself I would not take anymore and I wish I would have flushed the pills down the toilet immediately but I was stupid and started taking them to get through going to Thanksgiving, dinner's and of course Christmas and even to make it to my class sometimes because I was just too sick and not ready to be in a class like that. I should have stayed in the hospital until I felt better. Now I've been taking 1/2 mg. almost everyday and I finally broke down and told my Mom last week and we went directly to my new psychiatrist for help. I had to make her promise not to tell my husband. We just spent $10,000.00 for me to get off this med and now I've wrecked everything. My husband is a wonderful man but has a very bad temper and if he ever finds out I'm afraid he'll leave me. I'm so afraid that I am right back to where I was when I went into the hospital and I just can't go through that again. My new psychiatrist gave me clonidine and neurontin for during the day but I still get horrible anxiety and have no energy without the suboxone. I promised my Mother that I didn't have anymore pills at home (I gave what I had with me to my psychiatrist and told her I had no more at home). Now, all week I've been taking the 1/2 mg of suboxone because I'm afraid my husband will see how sick I am and wonder what's going on and I have so much to do. Our oldest daughter who moved out 2 years ago with her boyfriend are looking to buy a house and I need to clean up her old room which I was using for storage and now there are bags of everything in there. This past March my dear Father passed away from a very rare type of cancer. He was only 66 years old. My Mother and I both took care of him for 6 months and I relied on those pills to get me through it. I still can't believe he is gone. I was so very close to him and I just keep pushing it out of my mind that he is gone. He knew I was taking the subutex and he wanted me to get off of it and get better. I never in my wildest dreams thought getting off of it was going to be this hard. When I was on it for 9 months I was able to wean myself off of it and everything came back. I really do not like the way the subutex or suboxone makes me feel. That's the problem. It doesn't make me feel. I was always very into music and very social but now I can't feel music and I don't even want to leave the house. I find no enjoyment in anything. I called my old psychiatrist who wanted me to make an appointment to talk to him (he doesn't take insurance so it cost me $160.00 for him to tell me that he prescribed this med to me off label because we had tried every antidepressant and nothing was working but when I told him I had taken hydrocodone sometimes for bad headaches and that it made me feel normal he decided that my problem was my opiate receptors which my new psychiatrist does not believe). He also said that suboxone is very easy to get off of and the reason why I was so sick in the hospital was because I'm like a diabetic who needs insulin and if I do not have the suboxone my body knows it needs it so I get sick. I refuse to stay on this for the rest of my life but can't get off of it. I did read somewhere that switching to another narcotic (maybe the hydrocodone) for a few weeks can help me to get off the suboxone but my psychiatrist will not give me that and now wants me to attend NA meetings because she thinks I'm an addict. I've been to a lot of meeting but they don't seem to help, plus a lot of the member's there are on suboxone and claim they are clean but all they've done was switch to another narcotic. I do believe that suboxone can be very helpful if someone is abusing narcotics or heroin but they also should be closely monitored and not be on the suboxone for more than a few months and then continue to go to NA meetings. I'm sorry this is so very long. I was thinking about ordering some hydrocodone off the internet but do not want to get in trouble or end up with something like a sugar pill. Has anyone ever ordered off the internet or heard of anyone else doing so and if so, did it turn out ok? Today I took a half mg. of the suboxone and feel ok and thought if I do this for a week then maybe I will be able to stop it again but if not I read somewhere that going back to what you tried first and then weening yourself off (within a couple weeks) can work also. What is tramadol and can that maybe be a substitute for the suboxone? I am so afraid and I just don't think I can handle another 17 + days of that nightmare of a withdrawl and how could I possibly cover that up from my family? Oh, I'm in so much trouble!!! If anyone has any advice I sure would appreciate it. Sincerely, Larsy1966
I feel like my life is ruined by taking suboxone for too long (2 years). My psychiatrist put me on?
- 31 Jan 2011 by Larsy1966
- 7 February 2011
- suboxone, depression, anxiety, opiate dependence, opiate withdrawal, panic disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, addiction, anxiety and stress, detox, opiate
Dearest Larsy, Don't give up. There are people on this site that have been through what you are going through and have been successful. I have never been on suboxone so I can't say the best way to wean off of it. But give this site a little time and there will be people who can guide you through this.
I don't recommend ordering hydrocodone off the internet as the formula is not reliable. Stick with the meds that the doctor has given you. Tramadol is a pain reliever similar to other narcotics that you have mentioned. Do you still have a problem with pain?
Hang in there Larsy and give the good people on this site time to get back in touch with you, we really do care,
Hi Larsy. I hope you feel a little bit better getting this off your mind. You have been through much! You can go even lower on the subs and then start skipping days. I've read a few good taper plans and you really should read them. Please don't take the tramadol. It's still not going to solve the problem and it's also addicting. Personally, I think your (old) doc is right in that the subs can actually heal the receptor sites in the brain. But wrong in that they aren't addicting and you need to stay on them for life. And buying off the internet is not only risky, they're really cracking down on these online pharmacies. Try to calm down and think about tapering the subs even lower. I'll be in touch soon. Hang in there and try to believe there is hope for you.
Please do NOT go back on any opiates, and yes, Tramadol is an opioid. Not only an opioid but it has SNRI antidepressant qualities to it, not a good choice!!!
I agree with chris about what your old doc said, regarding receptor sites.
You are being very hard on yourself indeed. Try to be kinder to yourself.
Sometimes it takes more than one try at getting off opiates.
The sub route can indeed be successful for some, one just needs to taper properly and not take too much.
Hopefully pattishan61 will read your Q and give you some advice, as she has successfully tapered with Subs and is now off and happy.
Don't give up hope, for that is all we have at times!!! This situation can be remedied.
Best wishes to you,
Larsy I beg you to just hang on for a while longer, I have seen some folks on here that have been through so much that I feel honored to read and to learn from what they have dealt with, they will see you story and start to give input and I think you will find that this is a good place to be filled with care and compassion. I have Chronic pain (had history of polio and fractures) that is beside the point I will try and note some of these folks who have had experience with the suboxone and try and put you in touch with them, Like Laurie I would not feel comfortable to order medication from the internet, please,please just give this and some other a little time and please hang in there I care and so do so many others
I don't know if I thanked everyone who commented on my looooong question but I just want you all to know how thankful I am for all the caring advice! I have a psychiatrist appt. in a couple of hours and I'm not sure what to say. She thinks I do not have anymore suboxones but I do and I can't part with them because I'm afraid I will go crazy. I will tell her about this site I've been on and ask if there is an easier taper than just going cold turkey off 1 mg. per day. I really wish she would let me try xanax or xanax xr or valium. I don't care about getting addicted to them. I'm already on clonzepam 4 x's per day and it doesn't seem to be doing anything. I've been on it for 15 years. If she doesn't want to give me a different benzodiazepine then I may have to look for another psychiatrist. I really want to be off this suboxone and I can't believe how hard it is to go off of it.
I should have stayed off of it the time I slowly weened myself off after being on it for 9 months. It was so easy and all my feelings came back. I think it's a great medication for people who are addicted to opiates, heroin, even pain issues but should only be used for a few months and then stopped for awhile before trying it again. Wish me luck today :) Larsy1966
You poor girl... you need to just stop the suboxone, it does attach to your receptors but that is the problem. Your receptors need to repair themselves when you get off addicting drugs. I am going through the process right now after withdrawal from methadone which was unbelievable. wicked. I am in the PAWS stage now. Google it. You have no choice but to quit it, if you want your life, yourself back you have to pay the price. Nothing in this world is easy. I suffer from PAWS but I know I am in a recovery state and that is good enough for me. God Bless and Good Luck. Sable
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