Hello! New to the site, wanted to share my experience and hopefully get some positive comments and tips!.
24 y/o male (strong and traiend, nice job, international lawyer recently graduated, nice carrer prospects, musician and singer, pretty content overall [spoiler: now that i'm getting better haha] I've been through extensive and intense pressure and stress the last year, i've always been anxious as well. This cocktaill induced depersonalization episodes that became more a more prominent and long-lasting to the point of beign 24/7 in that state for a month, maybe month and a half. (True HELL if anyone has been there knows what i'm talking about, i could hardly explain what it is like be on that "realm") via meditation, insight, research and work (relaxing is work to someone like me too haha) i was able to get out of there (i was lucky and strong enough to never leave my activities and force myself to go on with my life, i repeat, it was hell). So iwas out but severe panic attacks started, last week i was on the E.R, i tought myself dying, and i was working, therefore big warning sign.
Long story short, after almost a year, decided to get help, went to a psychiatrist. He put me on lexapro 5mg for 4 days, then i amped it up to 10. Been a week and oh boy, what a week. Btw the psy, Great man, very comprehensive, i really trust him, straightforward, no bs.
I've had side effects? Yes, many, thisss dizziness (not like nausea, more like a pre panic attack state), proper nausea in the morning (very little), strange feeling in the back of the tongue, and a few very minor panick attacks (i stress, very minor in time and intensity that have decreased and haven't had them in the past three days) I would say this, the drug helps but you gotta help it, the previous days i would google symptoms and read horror stories, not helpful mate, i would concentrate too much in what was happening in my body.
Here i get to the point: also (the one that worries me) the first days i had this relatively short episodes of euphoria, like feeling pumped and happy for no reason (i've read too many horror stories, i know i shouldn't, i don't know if it really was for NO reason). I did not do anything crazy apart from eating some sweets (strict diet, very committed to calisthenics, training), buut was not so baad i guess haha. I felt like enjoying my recovery but also want to be aware of anything i... well, should be aware of haha.
I, personally was happy for finally having done something about my problem after being "in the dark" for so long, and i still am. In this "episodes" i was happily walking down the street, smiling, kind to everyone (did not have a crash or depression after), this has not happened again, not even when i started with 10mg (nevertheless side effects instensified, and started to decrase again, normal
I guess). But i'm afraid of it happening again, idk, just afraid of being bipolar or smething (please forgive my ignorance if i'm saying something stupid or harmful to anyone here)
Sorry for the excesive post if i must, but then again:
Should i be worried about any of these things? I'm worried about having one of this maniac things, which makes suspicious of being happy, is this stupid? Haha. I'am feeling better every day, as the side effects subside.
This is my first time here, so i hope everyone that reads this has a great day. If anyone should be on any of the stages i was or am now, stay strong, there is hope, and the will of your mind and heart can get you out of there if you work with it, keep it up!!
Thanks in advance, truly helps to express myself.