I would say that I have pretty severe derealization/dissociation/depersonalization. I am to the point where I am out of carrots and I am out of sticks. I have not felt like I was "normal" or "in my body" or even completely real for at least 2 years. I have intrusive suicidal idealization. I have been diagnosed with manic depression, ADHD, PTSD, GAD, and Panic Disorder over the course of the last seven years and have tried:
Why am I still experiencing these awful symptoms? Some drugs have helped some symptoms but even when combined and monitored by different doctors, nothing helps fully. Not long term at least. I want to feel real. What is it going to take? I am willing to do anything at this point.