I have been avoiding sex because a few times during sex with my girlfriend I lost my erection for no apparent reason.. I may have just been out of it. We had a VERY healthy sex life before this issue which started 6 months or so ago. Basically she got really mad after one of the times it happened. I got nervous and we started having sex less and less because I was scared I would lose my erection or not be able to get an erection on the spot. I also sometimes get destracted by thoughts which interfere with my ability to just enjoy sex. This happened progressively over the last six months. I just want to be able to have a good healthy sexual life. I've tried to just let it go but my brain holds onto this anxiety that I might not perform right or thoughts that distract me from enjoying sex. I'm against drugs honestly but at this point I'll try whatever.. Viagra if if it will just make me concentrate on sex and enjoying it. Or a prescription to help me get over anxiety this all causes.
First of all, your gf is pretty insensitive. You should be able to talk to her about it, not get condemned. Viagra might help you keep an erection however it won't do anything for what you are thinking. Talk to your dr about it.
21 Nov 2013
I don't think you need any meds. What she has done to you is uncalled for. I would get a different gf. But, that is just my honest opinion... You can always work through it but what she did is very damaging to a mans ego not saying your ego is big but it does emotional damage that needs to be worked through..
27 Nov 2013
Your girlfriend's response has caused your anxiety over this. If she had just said it's okay let's go to sleep and try tomorrow kiss kiss. Then there might not be an issue. Instead now you're on edge you'll get another rejection from her. Talking to a psychologist or maybe just a good friend would help most/best. And letting her know that in the future you'd appreciate supportive more positive responses might be a good idea. Have you guys been together long? If you guys are new and getting comfortable with each other things may go one way. If you've been together a long time then obviously things may go another way. Really I think you need to recover from her reaction. What happened to you happens to everyone btw. Well every guy at least. And prob more than once.
6 Oct 2014
Try satisfying her without using your penis. Then neither one of you will worry about if it's hard or not.
18 May 2018
Anxiety during sex is natural. The problem with most men suffering from sexual performance anxiety is that they fear anxiety. Try EFT ( emotional freedom technique )and that may sort out your problems. You can learn the basics from videos in YouTube dedicated to the technique. There are two basic types of EFT practice, the basic standard one and then the choices EFT. Good to start with the standard method and then graduate to the choices method. I personally use EFT to level out any emotional disturbance including anxiety. It's simple, it's easy and the best part is that it works irrespective of whether you believe it or not. Need a bit of learning initially but then it becomes easy as hell.
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