I have swelling after sex and soreness after the wife used vagifem
I can appreciate and understand how uncomfortable intercourse can be for "both" parties. Perhaps using an additional lubricant (like KY Jelly) can help you both. With vaginal dryness comes that friction and irritation you describe. It isn't permanent and it isn't lethal. My bet is your wife is still experiencing discomfort as well. Where there is a will... there is way. Be open with your wife and talk about your issues... talk with her prescribing doctor as well to see if other options are available to prevent your discomfort.
Be safe, be well and take good care of your personal, sexual health and well being.
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