ok i just started zoloft about a week ago exactly, and i supposedly have to up my dose today. well for starters i always been depressed and worried frequently about everything, i suffer from G.A.D and S.A. and then about 4 months ago i did something i absolutely regret [smoked Weed and drunk rum] and it messed me up really bad which i think made me experience Depersonalization[the feeling of not being real] and it had scared me so bad and put alot of stress on me i guess. but i didnt experience this until 2 months later after the weed incident. and it just hit me one day, i guess cause my body just couldnt take it any more and just shut down emotion, at least that what i hear why it does it. And i finally decided to see a doctor and get prescribed some meds to help me. Well i didnt tell him about my weed incident or depersonalization. and well he just gave me zoloft. so the first day of taking it was ok, i woke up in the morning with anxiety but it calmed down and i felt really happy but i had trouble sleeping,nightmares, Somewhat suicidal feelings, still had depersonalization issues. and tried to meditate which helped alot. and this same thing continued for the next four days of taking it. Then last night, i only slept for 3 or 4 hours and woke up with a panic attack which lasted about 10 minutes, i calmed myself down though as best as i could. and afterwards i had intense enlightment which lasted about 15 minutes. then i just tried going back to sleep. Now im up, feeling blurry headed, not really here but still alive,nauseous, anxiety and now im supposed to up my dose and im just very reluctant :( what should i do?