Ive been addicted to pain medication for over 4 years now, Everything from oxycontin to oxycodone. Whatever has been available to me. All my life I have struggled with addictions since I was 14 years old really. From alcohol, to amphetamines, benzos, mdma, whatever I could get my hands on to stay away from reality. But nothing could have ever prepared me for what I am experiencing right now. After being on 10mg percocet and roxies (not as prescribed) non stop for 2 1/2 years straight. I went on Soboxin off and on for 2 weeks. Well the soboxin ran out and I am on day 2 with nothing. I feel as if I am losing my mind, my legs wont stop aching and jumping, my stomach wont stop hurting, I feel almost as if ive gone insane and im on a permenant trip. If this is what sobriety is then I dont want to exist! I squirm and I wiggle, I stretch and try to take a bath but even the water on my skin sends goose bumps all over my body and feels like im bathing in shards of glass. Im fighting second to second not to take another pill even just a piece of one to ease this horrible existance but my struggle is a pitiful attempt living in a house hold where my entire family is addicted to these same medications and I have such easy access to them. Im still here. But will I remain? What a life...
Jenny