I have been on one or more antidepressants since 1998. They all have the same effect; I feel better for about a week, then the depression returns. Sometimes with a vengeance. I have been on: Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Prozac, Aventyl, Celexa, Lexapro, Paxil, Effexor, Cymbalta, Seroquel XR and I am currently taking Trazadone and Venlafaxine together which I now understand has possible severe side effects. I have seen general practioners, psychological nurse practioners and have seen psychologists and psychiatrists for this. I cannot seem to get anywhere. Currently I have developed a twitch in my left eye, have absolutely NO sex drive at all, for a man that seems ridiculous, very little energy, I sleep 10-12 hours a day and wake up exhausted. I "hate" being the center of attention or getting any attention at all and I dislike intensely being around groups of people. I have been out of work since 2007. I tried to go back to college to finish my degree twice since 2000 and have absolutely no interest and a complete inability to maintain focus to stay in school. I also recently developed a "block" in my short term memory that leaves complete blanks of events that happened only seconds ago. I have been a Type 1 diabetic since 1983, age 12, severly overweight- 6'2" and weigh 270 pounds, but I do not eat much in the way of calories- 2000 to 2200 per day. I have my wife of 16 years and 3 wonderful children that keep me very busy. Yes, my wife has repeatedly asked me about my low sex drive but still stands by me. I have been tested for LowT and my numbers came out at the very end of low normal, within points of being abnormal. I had a MRI of my brain and they located a small, 2mm by 4mm, microadenoma on my pituitary but tests revealed that it was a nonproducing adenoma. I suffer from headaches, gastrointestinal upset, severe heartburn for which I take protonix. I used to be very active, pleasant and friendly. I had a lot of friends and enjoyed working. In fact it was the thing I loved doing the most. I had hobbies and coached my first two sons on their t-ball and minor league baseball teams. Now I can only stand in a distance on the sidelines and observe.
Can somebody please help me get back to being myself? I miss being me and I miss being involved. HELP!