it started during the winter of 09' 2010. & as most of you probably know, escalated slowly & unknowingly. i don't feel the need to go into those details. my goal was to always keep my tolerance down, & i did a great job at that, taking two 10mg a day or so, but regardless, you can/will become dependent. i'd wake up & that was the first thing on my mind. after my first set of withdrawals i knew something had to be done. i quit cold turkey for almost 2 months, but then they fell right back into my lap. i don't know what to do, i've quit handfuls of times, always cold turkey, the withdrawals aren't even the problem for me, it's stopping the urge down the road. there is always an excuse. i have outstanding will power, & i know that is all it truly takes. but i'm desperate for any additional help. it seems like i can go a week or 2, then i end up taking a few. always stopping right after. this is something i know i shouldn't do, but can't seem to help it when the opportunity presents itself. i don't like the person i've become, & having a hidden addiction is eating at me deeply. i'm sorry for the rant, this is my first post & you all seem so wonderful in what i've read. i just am wondering if anyone has tips to the mental game. i keep reading about withdrawals, & i'm more worried about my mind. i always seem to think one won't hurt, since it's no longer a daily habit, but it hurts every time no matter.
I was addicted to Soma which is like valium very similar. and it went from three pills a day to 10 a day or more. Then i would have to go cold turkey for about 10 days till my next refill. so i know all about that demon, either you buck up and just tell yourself no. or you can goto narcotic meetings, see a pscych, or just talk to people like us who have been through it. i'll friend you so if you want to answer me a personal question you are more then welcome. good luck with everything in your life.
This is an example of what is called cravings, and it has been known to derail many good intentions. The brain and body actually love opiates, the brain produces its own, but is smart enough to only trickle them when they are needed. Opiates give energy, and help push past normal limits, they can get us started in the morning and keep us going past when we should stop. Many times, people also have inherited the addictive gene and also watched their families take a pill or have a drink to take the edge off or keep going when times are tough. Plus their are emotional issues that can trigger relapses. If you want to change this for good, seek an addiction therapist, who will add much needed support, help you heal emotional issues, be your cheerleader, guide you, and give you a plan to get over this. Suboxone or subutex would also help with the cravings, not sure if you need to go that route or not, I used it and it helped me tremendously. I support you and so will many other people here, you sure are not alone. Pattishan
You need to address the underlying issues that keep you turning to the addiction for answers. I recommend addiction's counseling of some kind. You can google "Narcotics Anonymous" to find meetings near you and have free support from fellow addicts. Being able to talk face to face and learning the tools necessary to overcome temptation are there for the offering. You can find the "winners" in these meetings, get a sponsor and have someone to call when temptation knocks. It isn't easy giving up the pills, but really is a simple process of getting the help you need to stay clean.
I have been clean now for many many years and started my sobriety in AA and NA meetings. The tools I learned there I still use to this day. Please get some counseling, it really will help.
We are here for you anytime, just keep posting,
Just wanted to say that I am another person who cares, I am one among so many so Just know that anytime you feel the need to talk we are willing to help with all those other special people that Laurie is telling you about, having someone in your area can mean the world, but being able to come to the computer you will also find us willing to help.
You have already beaten this thing in the long run because you have acted on the very first and most important step. Do you know what that is? You admitted that you have a problem with Vicodin addiction. I bet you never get a guilt free or shameless high like we use to before we knew we had a problem. This knowledge has actually cause your brain to build a defense system making the relapses hurtful and almost never enjoyable. Vicodin doesn't fall from the sky so it doesn't "fall into you lap" as you stated in your post. You took action to get them any other wording is a lie to yourself. When I stopped Vicodin the first time I called up the VA, pain specialist, and psychiatrist that I had been getting the drugs from. I could not go to these people anymore but 26 days later when my condition flared and I was in pain I chose to go to a DR that I had not informed of my problem. Then when offered a rx for 60 pills I chose not to decline the script.
After my relapse I canceled the refill and called that DR and informed him of my narcotic problem. You have got to address the following
1.) Why are you taking the pills, even when they make you feel worse?
2.) How are you getting them
1.) Because you know that taking the pills is wrong you will never again feel that good "high" when you take them. It will always be clouded with shame, hurt, guilt and it will always bring you down lower. There is no exception to this july1988 IT IS OVER AND YOU CANT HAVE IT BACK SORRY. The addiction part of your condition is the desire for the drug despite the fact that you know what will happen if you take them. You have got to find a way to deal with the cravings. Medication like suboxone might help or try exercise even putting a chile pepper under your tong can help with cravings. If you are self medicating then you need to address that with a specialist, typically with narcotics people have underlying depression, a condition that is pretty simple to address.
2.) You must promise us by Wednesday that you WILL call all your sources and ask them not to prescribe, bring over, or what ever any narcotic medication. You are allergic to opioid medication, you don't have to say addicted. If you are not in the situation where you can get narcotics then they you won't be as likely to relapse.
You are in Control of Your Body. You are not a addict you are in recovery. Recovery can be bumpy but if you have been totally honest with yourself about the addiction than you are going to beat this thing in the end. There just isn't any other possibility. It all comes down to what you choose to do. Take actions to make your recovery stronger everyday and you will not be disappointed.
- Vicodin Information for Consumers
- Vicodin Information for Healthcare Professionals (includes dosage details)
- Side Effects of Vicodin (detailed)
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