I've looked all over the site start a support group under this title and have gotten nowhere, so I guess I'll start here.
Knowledge is Power. The more we know about our condition is the better prepared to deal with it.
I am an addict, both of prescription medication and an alcoholic. I'll start there.
In the last several months, I would get extremely sick and not understand why.
Finally I looked up morphine addiction and there it was! Sad eh? I'm a retired nurse... I was so sick though, I couldn't do much of anything, especially THINK.
I've heard so many times on this website good people just tearing themselves apart, feeling as though they are the worst person in the world because they have addictions. Understanding addictive behavior began to help me understand not only myself, but how to DEAL with my behavior. My hope is that this will happen for you.
I'll begin by listing some things I know, either from personal experience or research, and then hopefully, as others add to it, we will all understand the nature of our thinking a little better, and hopefully get a better handle on it.
Addiction to substances like opiates causes changes in the way our brain responds... both to the way we think altogether, and the way we think regarding our addiction.
Some behaviors are; drug seeking behavior (that dreaded phrase, and with that behavior the drug we seek overrides just about EVERY THOUGHT WE HAVE.
We have to have it. We make all kinds of excuses for taking too many of our presription meds such as; my pain is just too much today, I have to have some relief, it isn't fair that I have to live like this, I'll be careful after today, and before I run out I'll taper down the amount I take so I don't run out, I know I'll be sick for a few days, but anyhing is worth getting away from the way I feel right now, and so on.
With our action of taking an excess amount, almost immediately we feel anger at ourselves, humiliated that a substance can control us, guilt, shame, failure, fear, hopelessness, anxiety, DEPRESSION, memory loss, confusion.
We will; sell things to get the drug, go to several Drs. and several pharmacies to get what we think is enough... even though we know we could get in a lot of trouble for this, steal, ostrasize ourselves, from loved ones, from just about everyone, neglect our responsibilities, at work, home with family... even to the point of jeapordizing our jobs.
Our brain chemistries have been altered, completely unaware to us to compel us to behave and feel this way.
These are some of the things I've learned. As a result, I have turned my meds over to my husband, and If I decide to take more, I have to answer to him.
The knowledge of these behaviors alone has helped me see things in a different light to the point that I recognize my "excuses" as opposed to 'genuine need."
In the case of genuine need, we need to address it with our Drs.
I hope this is helpful. But more, I hope that those who respond will add some of their own experiences... 'excuses' and even better, how they've learned to recognize these excuses and work with overcoming giving in to them.
Becoming an addict was no ones choice. They either have a family or medical history that brought on addiction... in my case both.
Thats some of what I've learned. Anyone???
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