My therapist told me that things I thought I couldn’t do were really “choices” that I made. E.g. I was not able to attend my brother’s wedding because I was in the hospital being treated for a stroke, hooked up to lines including morphine for terrible head pain. I had been paralyzed on one side, could barely speak, had difficulty speaking, and couldn’t think about anything but my pain. But was it my choice that I decided not to go to my brother’s wedding? I told her it wasn’t a “choice”. She said that it was. That I suppose was to make me feel that I have more control in my life?

She also talked about being in the moment. She gave an example of holding an apple and thinking about all the hands that had handled the apple, from those picking it, transporting it, etc. I told her that was boring. I said so I’m supposed to only be in the moment cleaning up the kitchen and washing the dishes? I would rather be thinking of other things. She asked if that worked for me. I said that it did. Supposed to be in the moment walking into the grocery store with a halting gait due to my stroke? Or be in the moment as I drop things, spill things and am clumsy due to my stroke? I would rather focus on other things. If I really focus on the moment, I will focus on my constant pain from my fibromyalgia that I instead ignore as much as possible. Bending down to put dishes into the dishwasher pains my migraines and my fibromyalgia. Or focus on what I'm eating which I hate to eat since my stroke? I focus on anything else besides what the food tastes like.

I sincerely want to hear if anyone else has used these 2 techniques to help their pain and disabilities. And how? Maybe the therapist just didn’t describe them well to me. Another social worker also was going to use "being in the moment". What am I missing here? Or do you have another method of helping your pain and disabilities. Ignoring them has worked best for me while I focus on what I really want to do and enjoy.