well as a child me my brother and my mom were all physically, emotionally, and verbally abused for few years by her boyfriend at the time. I cant go into detail wat happened bc its hard for me 2talk about and hate re-living it, but these are just very very few things that i expierienced, both me and my brother were beaten regulary by those plastic bowling pins then got sent 2 the corner and if we moved, cried anything we wld get beaten again told 2 "shut up else ill give u something 2cry about"/ i wld get made to watch scary gorey movies when i was 3 still cant watch "CANDYMAN" by the way and im 23yrs old!/ me and my brother were forced to watch him beat the crap out of our mother everyday! Thats not even all the shit ive been through, yes my mother and us finally got out of there after she i guess just got sick of us bein beat on and her and she finally stood up and beat the shit out of him for self defense and shes the one who got sent 2 jail (very messed up right?) We got into a safehouse after years of him making her feel like she was worthless and nobody would ever want her with 3kids (sister was baby at time)- But now 2 this day i hate showing any emotion that has to do with crying, i have such bad trust issues with any guy which is hard bc i finally found someone i can trust but i still accuse him of stuff, i get bad anger problems that i kno isnt me, im a drug and alcohol addict bc i wanted to numb all the pain and never think of my past, i jump everytime i hear loud noise, im paranoid, when i sleep my dreams end up makin me re- live it the parts i do remember of my dreams i wake up screaming, crying or both at same time, my boyfriend tells me i wake him up hitting him and yelling and screaming as if i was doing it to him but he realizes im still sleeping he says its like im attacking someone in my dream. One thing i will never do is ever hit my daughter refuse to! Its been so hard for me bc of this stuff this guy did so many mental issues, i just started slowly talkin bout it with my psychiatrist but still cant get into alot of dtails bc i just dont kno why please can anybody give me advise? would GRATELY appreciate it!