Hello,

I used to define myself as a cheerful, content and independent person. But I've been going through an unhappy period since around Christmas time. I have a mother who has been severely clinically depressed for over a decade. But she has of late become more destructive, suicidal and angry. The stress of being around her has broken something inside of me. I am overwhelmed now by feelings of guilt, anxiety and self-criticism. My life seems to be becoming smaller and smaller, I've lost the desire to leave the house and am out of work. I've seen psychiatrists of course, so far medication is not helping me. My family wants me to apply for disability because I haven't pulled my life together. I don't want to apply for disability. I feel as though I am not disabled by depression, I think there are some legitimate life issues I am facing that I have the ability overcome with a little guidance and more time, maybe support groups and plans. I don't want to become a person unable to support myself. My family has told me that I'm not a judge of what my capabilities are, and to let the experts decide that. I feel uneasy about this. These are big life changes and I think they are being made too quickly when it may not be necessary to make them at all. Part of me feels like I am strong person, and that my life is being taken out of my own hands. But maybe I am wrong, and I should listen to the advice that I have been given. I know there are others out there listening. What would your advice be to me. Based on what I have said do you think I should pursue disability now? Is this a hasty decision or is it rather the healthy thing to do?

Thank you for anything you might have to add,