I finally tried therapy. The First one was really nice, but she asked the same questions I've been trying to get answers for, I knew as much as she did. The I noticed another one that offered treatment procedures like EDMR. I did a summary which gave her idea why I was there, most major is being there for my aging parents, but depression is so bad I can't be. I worked hard to touch major issues, it was a decent summary from my heart.. However, she started blaming medication, I have chronic pain, she asked which was more important, my family or my drugs!!! It's taken me years to come to grips that without pain medication I cannot function and try push guilt down. How could she say that, if I wasn't in pain I'd be off these things years ago, I have been much more depressed since the visit! She apparently works close the psychiatrist I see and even questioned what he prescribed! She seems to know a lot, maybe she's right, but I don't have more money to go somewhere new. I am open for input, am I being to sensitive? Should I just tell her what she did by saying that?
Open honest communication is important when utilizing a therapist. There is no doubt that opioid drugs can increase depression but so can chronic pain. I would flat out tell her that you are offended by her accusation that you like drugs more than your family. That was unfair of her to say that. I would be honest and tell her that accusations such as this are unfair and that they are not beneficial for anyone. Tell her that you need pain medication to function in your daily life, that you couldnt do ___ (insert what activities you cannot perform without meds-shop, cook, take a shower, get out of bed, walk etc). Tell her you understand that they can increase depression but also let her know that chronic pain increases depression as well (she should know this!). There are certain health care professionals that are very anti-opioid and she may be one of them.
If she is, she may not be the best therapist for you. I would tell her that as well. Ask her if she is anti-opioid or anti-pain med, and if she is, then it is likely she is not going to be helpful as your therapist. She is there to help guide you to solve problems. You are not there to spare her feelings! If she says something that bothers you, let her know that it bothers you and tell her what you have told us, that it has taken you time to come to grips with the fact that you cannot function in daily life without medication for pain. Would she ask a diabetic if his insulin was more important than his family? I dont think so! Open up communication and tell her what you feel. As I said, you are not there to spare her feelings!!
This was very unkind to do to a sensitive person, it's her job to show empathy and give you appropriate therapy not to be verbally abusive and judgmental. She is not a prescribing doctor for you, she needs to stick to her own profession and show a better bedside manner. I hear you say it was a difficult choice to finally make the leap to see a therapist, for myself(chronic pain, clinical depression and anxiety patient) I have always felt terribly uncomfortable unfolding my life(baring your soul's damn hard to do for some of us, especially a stranger) and she kicked you while you were down, I think I would of clammed up.
Confrontation is an option but if your not going to continue this relationship, why let her have the option to add to the damage!? I've found online support groups(here and an online course, 'living well with chronic conditions moderated by another suffer.) I have felt more support and improved quality of life through peers. You can get things off your chest and know the empathy is automatic because they have similiar concerns and we all help each other in some way. I truly wish you the best, your feelings are valid and you deserve to be treated with dignity. Just me but never be afraid to fire a medical professional, they work for you. I believe I would compain to the doc you see there. If you'd ever like to chat, message me, you can sometimes not have time for everyone living with chronic pain, but new friends are always welcome.
I would get rid of this therapist who will be flinging more of her own biases towards you in the future. She is not a truly caring therapist to have put it to you like that. Have you tried anitdepressants for your depression? That could help you. Have you tried different ones? If so, have you tried a good psychiatrist who knows how to combine different meds to help you? There must be help for your depression as well. Wish you a better future.
I listen to a therapist, because I thought this is the proper thing to do, I was being harassed by someone and there was no proper communication with me and the therapist and I ended off having a severe stress attack my suggestion is self respect first no less respect just because you are doing the RIGHT thing and going to therapy, Good luck
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