We are trying to deal with my sons relapse back to using heroin. I found out tonight that he has started to use again. This time i wasnt quite as blindsided as before. the signs were there and was hoping i was wrong but i wasnt. Last time we had him on the subs to get off and treatment was costly for the family. We continue to search for reasons but he offers little. Im having a hard time with controlling my anger and disappointment. I know it doesnt help but i struggle with the let down and watching his mom struggle to keep her composure. We were hoping he would be able to avoid a relapse. Any advice as to what next? Last time we had a hard time getting him into a treatment center in our area as the need so outweighs the availability. How will the treatment centers react when he is relapsing? Does anyone have any advice? Dad
Sons Relapse, heroin is horrible?
Added 19 Mar 2012:
Thank you all!!! its been a while since i signed into this site. My Son just turned 25 last month and has been off the heroin for about 1 and a half years. We got him back to the same clinic and as you all stated the counselling was needed and although he has used it sparingly he has gone more than the first time. This time he used methadone to get off of the Heroin and he has dropped down in dose gradually. It appears he is on the road to recovery finally. He was in need of some help fopr his depression and that seems to have been the key to getting him off the drugs. I would assume most addicts have some form of issue they are dealing with and need treatment for that as well as the drug. I Thank you all for the advice along the way and hope that as my family has worked thru this hell you and yours can also. I will check in when i can to guide any i can as we felt alone to start with as well. God bless
Addiction occurs on 2 levels, a physical and a mental level. He is not over it mentally, and the triggers are still there, so he started up again. There is supposed to be mandatory counseling with suboxone, but I see from the vast majority of posts that it is not being suggested to most patients. If you can find a suboxone group and a therapist who uses the methods of Eugene Adler, this may help. He needs the support from his peers in the suboxone group and the Adlerian therapy helps heal all the things the addiction affected, including relationships that got damaged. It will teach him to have goals, to not isolate himself. It is similar to the way Dr. Drew treated people on Celebrity rehab and sober house. And you and your wife may need to have some counseling to help deal with this and to teach you how to tough love. I will keep you in my Prayers.
I am so sorry to hear about your sons relapse. If his treatment center were a good one and helped him in the past, I could see no reason why they would turn him away. Relapsing, especially on such a powerful, seductive drug as heroin, the center should not be surprised nor turn him away. On the other hand, if they had pushed the counseling and follow up therapy, his chances of relapse would be much less. Not to say they didn't try their best. But that's how powerful the pull of heroin can be. Is there another facility in the area? You also will benefit greatly from you and the rest of your family getting counseling, learning the best ways to deal with your sons relapse. As hard as this must be for you and your wife to deal with, it is vital you remain a "team" united as one against this disease. It would help to know his age, how long had he used before, when did he relapse? And it's almost impossible trying to figure out why.
If everyone knew why our loved ones relapse, we could head it off at the pass. So please try to focus on how to help him now, not so much on what led him to use again. It could have simply been a trigger and it was there for the taking. He may have even searched it out again and went through great lengths to use and try to hide it from you. Don't get me wrong, "why" is important it's just very hard to answer. It will also help knowing his method of use. Is he shooting it, snorting? Is he at an age where he is still on your health insurance?
Patti and sweetlemon are wonderful support people. There are many members here more than willing to help you and your wife through this. But it has to be your sons decision about really wanting to come clean this time. Please try to remember that this is a disease. It does have a cure. It will take much strength and determination on everyone's part for your son to remain an ex-addict. What kind of vibes are you getting from him about quitting for good this time? We can only make suggestions to you and support you with words through this difficult time.
My thoughts and prayers are with you,
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