My son was arrested for a DWI and possesion of PCP March 5th. He was bailed out of jail. Myself nor was the rest of my family aware that he had an addiction to PCP. He is 27. He needs rehab sooooooo badly, he is phsycotic, he lost his apartment the other day because I called an ambulance on him & the police told his land lord about his arrest so his landlord gave him 3 weeks to get out. A ferw days ago he took a female friend at knife point to take him to go get drugs, unsucessful, could not get them got ripped off. Two nights ago he got totally intoxicated from alcohol and went to the same female friends house walking an hour or more to get there and just started screaming WHY, WHY, WHY, did you dio this to me??? He was taken by the police to a ER. They held him until his alcohol level was normal, then released him!!! My daughter and I told them a few things about him and told them he needs to be put in a rehab, but the Pshyc nurse claims he was fine. We do not know waht to do. Today he lost his job :-( because he did not make it to work Monday, not sure why? He got out of the hospital Sunday night at 11:00 pm and walked over 3 hours to get home. Petrified for him and others, yesterday I was in the car with his female friend and him. He pretty much came out of no where and said in a very strange way "I can kill the both of you right now I have nothing to lose" I jumped out of the car fearful for my life. Then the guilt of leaving his female friend in there was horrible. She is very strong and told everything was ok. I like my son have a depression problem, I am on medication, he is not
My heart goes out to you for the pain you are experiencing. I have two sons, and I am sure I would be beside myself in the same situation. Have you sought legal advice? I am just wondering if you could gain guardianship of him since he is clearly a danger to himself, and from your information, also a danger to society. Sometimes the addicted person has gone so far down the scale that they cannot nor should they be expected to make any decision. His disease (addiction is the name of this chronic, progressive, fatal disease, if not treated.) is literally screaming to him and it wants to take him out, and maybe take someone else out too. He has to be detoxed before anyone can assess the real person. We moms have a tendency to look at our children as "babies" no matter what their stage in life. Try to keep in mind that he is a grown man, but fragile right now. Before he winds up detoxing in prison, perhaps waking up to find out he has taken the life of someone he loves, get an emergency court order for guardianship and then have him admitted at least long enough to clear out the toxins. I am not a lawyer, so cannot give legal advice, but I am in the mental health field. I am acquainted with someone in prison for life without the possibility of parole for murdering and dismembering his aunt while on PCP. He is now clean and sober, in prison for the rest of his natural days and twisted with guilt. As parents of small children we had to make some unpopular decisions that were the right decisions for them in the long run. I hope after this one, he will clean up his act and live a long healthy life helping others with his experience. My prayers go with you.
Hi, the most important question is, does your son want help? Does he ever show remorse after a blow out, does he realise how dangerous he can be? The first response is right, in advising you how to to try to deal with the problem in the best way. A convention or mental health order admission might be your only choices. Would you be able to get him to a hospital or is that out of the question? He needs a psychiatric assessment to be admitted to a treatment facility. I could write on and on, but it will all be things you already know, or have heard before. I WISH i could offer some good advise but you really do only have one option. Would it be possible to stage a convention? It doesn't have to be intense or scary, just if you can make him realise how much you love him and that you and others are willing to support him, and tell him you have faith in him (even if you don't).
Tell him what you think he will want to hear and show him the way to getting straight and having a good life again. It may sound like i am advising that you manipulate him, that isn't what i'm saying, just go easy on him. His head probably feels like it is about to explode just dealing with everyday life, so the suggestion of him having to work hard for something can be very daunting. I wish you all the luck in the world and pray that he gets better. Let us know how you are doing?
aw poor you i feel sooo terribly devastated for you and your family;my daughter is a recovering heroine addict and i understand a little of what your all as a family are going through,my daughter too was arrested on numerous occations we had to bail her out of jail and pay god knows how many court fines. i was so desperate in the end my doctor was very helpfull and got her into rehab for her own saftey as she was threatening to kill herself, you need professional help so try your family doctor he may be of some help. good luck please let me know how you get on il be thinking of you all, from tracyanne xx
I'm heart sorry to hear your story,but as was said before,your son needs to want to get help for himself first before you can do anything for him.
I understand your distress and constant worry,I have been there before with an addict and its a tough road to go through but you'll need to get professional help for yourself to have the knowledge to help him. It will wear you down and i can only imagine what you're going through.I wish you the very best and your son also needs the care he deserves for you as a mother.
Try get talking to someone professional asap as he is a risk to himself and others.You need to do it for him but also for yourself.
Its a horrible situation to be in and a long road to get through but with the right help and knowledge you can do it.
Keep us posted as to how its going,again i wish you the very best.
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