... opiate addiction. What can we do to help her with this? We found some old pain pills in her belongings and we threw them out
Our adult daughter recently moved home. Today we learned she is going to methadone clinic daily for?
- Asked
- 30 Jan 2010 by Lin1973
- Active
- 22 Aug 2012
- Topics
- opiate withdrawal, pain, methadone, addiction
Details:
Added 12 Feb 2010:
Update: She has been going to work and doing well. She goes to the clinic at 6:30 AM. They are reducing her dose little by little. I have noticed she is so tired. She comes home from work and sleeps for an hour, gets up and eats dinner, then back to bed. She has a rash and is flushed but doesn't complain. She has stayed away from druggy boyfriend and his friends, hope that's a good start.
Responses (4)
Psychmajor
30 Jan 2010
encouragement, if you notice a change in her personality (possitive ones are the best to use) complement her on the change. possibly see a therapist your self as well as her see one. learn as much as you can about addiction and make sure she doesnt hang out with friends/places/things which are associated with using. but the most important thing for anyone comming off a narcotic is the social support
subzero58
28 Apr 2010
hi mom n dad, first let say,if she got on a "clinic"on her own you have raised a woman that even though she has made mistakes,she is willing to correct them without being busted or court stipulated to do so. call her methadone clinic "the clinic"when you talk about it. the fact that she has a job and wakes up early enough to make the clinic before work,is a sign of a responseable person.most young people that are workin and taking care of the mess they got themselves into are lightyears ahead of the rest.be supportive,getting on her in a negative way will surely push her away.when you can,ask if she is getting counseling at the clinic.
Lin1973
28 Apr 2010
Thanks. She quit the clinic in February and we stayed w/her 24/7. The effects lasted about a week, but they weren't intolerable. She had leg pain and a headache and slept a lot. Just ate grapes and water and then after a few days she had crackers. Our problem now is that we think she's feeling sorry for sorry boyfriend who still uses and goes to the clinic, too. If she gets back w/him, she'll be doomed. But at her age 26, there's not a whole lot we can do about it, but pray. She's giving him her money again, so I suspect she's helping him pay for drugs. I hope it's just not a matter of time b/f she becomes opiate dependent again. She has a really good job (she has a college degree, and loser boyfriend hasn't worked in 7 years). I know, sad.
subzero58
28 Apr 2010
hi guys, you sound like a very levelheaded person. if you and your husband belive that there is a danger of her returning to a life of addiction,then look into suboxone.read what you can on line about it. to be totally honest with you when i was 45 years old i fell off of a roof and had 2 surgeries on my knees that were unsuccessful and was put on morphine for 4 years.it was like a death sentences for me.anyway now im on suboxone now for 9 months and my life has turned around 180 degrees.when you take suboxone you cant take opiates of any kind. or you get very sick. if she should fall back into addiction get her on it then you will not be worring about this crazy boyfriend.if he is on methadone he cannot take suboxone. try any and everything to help your daughter. god bless you and your husband.parents like the two of you are one in a million... pete.
A69
7 Jul 2012
Please, I beg you to give her as much LOVE and support that she needs right now. I am not a big fan of tough love, and some take it too far. All people need to be LOVED. I am not saying it is ok to use, or that u should enable her in any way. What I am saying is being loved will make her strong, being put down, shame, guilt, bad stuff, will back fire. She feels bad enough already, trust me, I believe love conquers all!!! Never kick her out or even threaten to, love her and help her love herself and find out what is the root of what is making her use. Many addicts stop using, but many start up again, because I was told an addict needs to go to the core, what are the drugs doing for her? Whatever she thinks they are doing for her, drugs are evil, from Satan himself, from hell and drugs are lies! Get as far away from them as possible, and try to help her fill a void that she may be trying to fill with drugs.
Anonymous
22 Aug 2012
Further Information
- Methadone Information for Consumers
- Methadone Information for Healthcare Professionals (includes dosage details)
- Side Effects of Methadone (detailed)
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Thank you. She was an athlete who never did any drugs. At 24 she got mixed up w/a man who always had a pain in his back, knee, you name it. Two years later we learn she has been doing pain meds with him. She has lost two jobs as living w/him wasn't conducive to working. She's been home now for 8 weeks, and today we learned she's going to the meth clinic. I will try to be as positive as possible. I can't "control" where she goes b/c of her age, can I?
no you cant but you need to get her to realise what going to specific places will do to her rehabilitation. Just being in an area where you use is a trigger to craving the substance again, people have the same effect as well as she will eventually be around the pills. This is a reason i suggest therapy so it will be easier to instill since a large amount of councilers have mental disorders them selves (depression, anxiety, substance abuse, bi-polar, and more)
Try and be more possitive than you think you even can. I believe that this will make it easier for you and i also believe that emotions are contageous (you smile at some one chances they will smile back, you cry they will feel sad or start crying) and will help her aswell. Optomism can be learned if its not already instilled into your mind...
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-"Imagin your good feelings as rainwater, and your body as the catchment area for the rainwater. As you make sure you feel as many good things as possible, you are keeping the catchment area full and overflowing. But if you forget to deliberately pu the good feelings in, the water level will drop very low to the bottom where the silt and mud lie. Negative feelings are just an indication to you that your catchment area has dropped down to the silt and mud, and that you need to fill yourself up again with good feelings until you are overflowing. Kepp your self overflowing by deliberately filling your self with good feelings every day"
-www.thesecret.tv
love this movie (its a theoretical version of cognitive behavioral therapy which if really thought about deeply enough makes sense)
Again, I thank you. This has been a rather emotional day for my husband and me. She has been sleeping since she returned from the clinic. We are hoping she can broaden her circle of "good" friends and not go back to the boyfriend who started this all in motion. I blame him totally as she's had many boyfriends who were not like that. She became of a master manipulator when she wore her heart on her sleeve for many years. I will watch the movie, too, thanks:) You are a dear!
19 years of life pays off! lol anyway uh nomater how you look at it she made that dicision and it turned into her problem. Do not let her just sit in her room when she is awake-dont force her but go into her room, get her motivated to come talk with you guys (about positive things like what she plans to do after all of this is done... get it implanted into her mind and edge her to it and i garentee it works out for her.)
Is there a reason why she has been sleeping since she got home from the clinic at 10 AM? It's 4:45 EST here. I check on her every 1/2 hour or so and she's breathing. She has been going to the clinich at 7 AM daily, then going to work at 9 AM (M-F). She just told us about the clinic yesterday. She was acting giddy and weird at dinner last night, so I sought out this site. I hope she isn't combining the clinic's med w/something else. She has been crabby and difficult. Hubby has her car keys, so if she wakes up and wants to go somewhere, we'll probably have a problem on our hands:(
Hi, just read your post, if she is on methadone it can make you sleepy at first for a couple of weeks but your body will adjust, she might be on too high a dose. First how long has she been on the clinic and ask her out of curiuosity how much her dose is. Methadone can be a good tool if like any tool used properly. The clinic has rules she should be going to group meetings once a week there and seeing a counselor there. This is a family disease and every one should be involved but its up to her. If you mix other drugs like valium or xanax it will knock you out but most clinics test for that. if she uses other opiates she will not get high that what the methadone helps with is the blocking and cravings. Hopefully she is serious about her recovery and will listen to the clinic and do that program.
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I have seen many peoples lives change for the better, the problem is when an addict doesnt have to get pills or they cant get the high sometimes they switch to other drugs like valium or xanax. Also the behavior of an addict doesnt change overnight once they start methadone thats where the therapy comes in. The most success if group,individual and the methadone and hopefully she can use these and start going on with her life again.
If you have question I have been on methadone three times in my life, I am 42 and i believe it saved my life but u have to follow the program. This can be a good thing for her and yes people do sleep on methadone when they first start and gain weight and tend to have mood swings. Does she have any underlying depression or mood disorder, alot of people on drugs have other issues.Remember take care of yourself and get educated about it. You can call the clinic and ask if they have tours or any information for the families about methadone, if they are a good one they will have information for you, not about her but how methadone works.Let me know
the car keys thing is a part of parenting an addict... To be honest my personal opinion is that all addiction and substance abuse is caused by genes as well as (this is my main focus->) a mental disorder such as depression or anxity which the person cant handel with a proper coping mechanism.
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I have only gone through benzo withdrawal and i would sleep as much as i could just because its not painful during this time but it could be her mixing a benzo/alcohol/muscle relaxer or something that is a sedetive but i would give her the benefit of the doubt (sorry i have my own substance abuse problem and im a bit drunk so i cant think if this is the right word (ps it took me 20 min to figure this out)... but im decent at psychology still!! woo!) opiates (methadone is still an opiate) has sedative properites in SOME patients (not all, i personally have excitatory properties... i cant sleep on these meds and will stay up all night) . I believe this to be the reason she sleeps constantly and after a week or so this should go away as long as shes taking the med properly. This has almost no high producing property if taken correctly (since she is going to a clinic daily she cant abuse this med) and when she starts dropping the dose on the med she may become very irritable and possibly violent but the more she knows the better off she could control this. (something i have read and personally experience is the fact that a TON of addicts think they can control their addiction but its not about being strong its about being smart and avoiding the situations)
--- apparently a lot of people take Methadone since it gives you a slight buzz -i think this is the placebo effect- so some people abuse this med and if they stop using it they can enter psychosis -i watch the Dr. Drew rehab shows and love them because i think we have a lot in common on how people work-
at times i almost wish i had a problem with opiate so i can relate to a majority of the pain releif addicts on the forums (pain meds use euforia as a way to prevent pain... this is EVERY pain med not just 1 or some this is every pain med thats narcotic)
I really like the comment "it's not about being strong, it's about being smart." Oh, we pray she will stay away from the new "friends" she has made since being w/her boyfriend. She moved in w/him after knowing him 2 months and he professed his undying love... and it nearly killed her, and hopefully, she will stay away. We are being kind and making her comfortable and proud that she has made it a new job since she's moved home. She admitted living with him and no structure is not conducive to working. He has a trust fund and hasn't worked in seven years and going on 30. She's still sleeping, but I check on her. Thank you for your insights and personal story. You are the best! I feel more hopeful now than I have all day.
Thank you, Okaynow, I have read everything I can about all of this. Sarah appeared more embarrassed than anything about all of this. I am a school teacher, so I do not fly off the handle about anything as I've seen it all in the last 20 years. I told her nothing to be embarrassed about, just happy that she recognized she had a problem and sought help. She has lived w/a man who has done drugs since he was in middle school. She moved back home after college after a bad breakup, and she was quite vulnerable to anyone who paid her the least bit of attention. She had knee pain after a beach VB game, and he gave her Vicodan or Xanex, and she found relief. Then it escalated. She became distant, argumentative, and unreliable when it came to family things. He claimed we didn't like him, so he refused to come at all. We had no idea of the magnitude of her problem.
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She goes to a clinic daily, has tested clean, so they give her a dose to take, so she doesn't drive there everyday. She asked them today to reduce her dose as she's gained 20 lbs. She has started to care about her appearance again (very pretty girl, but she has let herself go). Today I told her we will continue to be there for her, but she must leave still drugged up boyfriend and the friends behind. We'll see how it goes. Any other advice? She goes to work everyday, and she has a good job in her field; she has a college degree in business. Boyfriend has no formal education and hasn't worked in 7 years.
Hi
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Hopefully the clinic will offer good services and like any type of therapy it is important for the family to get invovled with that in time. Support her with the good things that are happening to her. I wouldnt mention her ex boyfriend much just because you want to keep the focus on her and hopefully she will see her part in this. its easy to blame others but the real breakthru comes when we realize our part that we play. Addiction is cunning and baffling but we know that with a good support system, and with time we do and will have a better life. Its good she is interested in her looks because that shows she starting to care about herself more but the methadone like I said is just a tool and has to be used properly and if she sticks with that program, therapy, group therapy, good hobbies and taking care of herself physically, mentally,emotionally and spiritually she will be tackling this disease on all levels. The physicall part is coming back she is stabilized on a dose that allows her to function she not going up and down from doing pills and diffrent doses, mentally and emotionally if shes in therapy and gettting her feelings out and not keeping them in she tackling that and I think the most important is spirituality. People say its many things, I believe its seeing our place in this world and how we relate and connect with others and who we look up to for our strength. God or who ever you trust and worship, its about love and forgiveness, its about new beginings and new perceptions, SHE IS ALIVE AGAIN AND NOT IN CHAINS BY THE OTHER DRUGS,SHE CAN FLY NOW AND SPREAD HER WINGS. YOU SEEM LIKE AN INCREDIBLE WOMAN AND I KNOW GOD WILL ANSWER YOUR PRAYERS. I WILL PRAY THAT GOD PLACES GOOD, LOVING, CARING PEOPLE IN HER PATH.
LOVE, PEACE, JOY
ROB
Thank you, Rob, I'm Lin (my name is correct, LOL). She had a really good day today at work, lots of kudos. She was stopping after work to pick up her mail from his place. We pray she comes right home; he tried the meth clinic, but he has failed his drug tests. She has passed hers each time. We think he's going to try to get her back since misery loves company. He's a very troubled young man( not too young, at 29) but he has a shaky relationship w/his parents. We tried to embrace him early on in their relationship, but he was aloof and arrogant; for what reasons, it is still a mystery. From the time we met, he looked at it (their relationship) as "war." Who will win, him or us? She's 26 so we couldn't do too much about it, just went along. We knew she had acted erratic and irresponsible the past several months, but we had no idea she was taking painkillers daily.
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I'm going to try to encourage her to bring back or out her spirituality like you said. She was a good Lutheran for years:) Thanks again for your input. You seem like a very good man. Lin
Hey Lin I myself a 37 year old married mother of 3 am now 39 days clean of painkillers and too going to a methadone clinic to dose daily. I want to wish many blessings on your family and a special good luck wish to your daughter. Lin i cannot help but notice you blame your daughters associate entirely for her addiction. I think part of your healing it would help if you realized your daughter being an adult made this decision on her own. I know that it is the love you have for your daughter that lets you place the blame I too have an 18 year old that when he gets into mishaps I tend to blame others until I sit down and think hey he makes in own decisions. Lin this is going to be a tough journey but you sound like a great mother and your daughter is lucky to have you, but remember addiction is an illness, he needs help too and he is not as lucky as your daughter to have family or friends who care.
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Your daughter at this time is certainly not strong enough to be the support for him, you should tell her that. I feel so much better by making the choice of sobriety for myself. Please if you want your daughter to heal be careful on how you support her. Hold your arms open for her to fall into at will don't pull her into a hug. Good luck.
Thank you for your support. She has steadily gone down in dose at the clinic. Only problem has been feeling sweaty, so that's good news. The clinician said since she was an athlete for many years, her body is stronger than most as she never did drugs prior to pain killers w/her boyfriend. He has since threatened to kill himself and we told her if she thinks he will and she is concerned, she should contact his mom or a close friend of his. She hasn't seen him in several weeks. Yes, we blamed him b/c she had severe menstrual cramps, and he said, "Here, take this." Downward spriral from there. She said, "I didn't think anyone who loved me would do that." She's not blameless, but she was naive. We're all laughing a lot now, like we used to, but we're always on guard. Thanks again!
She acts really weird from about 4 to 6 pm daily. Is it the meth or do you think she's doing something else? She's hyper and appears like her eyes will close at any moment.
I am an ER nurse... Methadone is very potent, and almost as bad as taking heroine. There is a drug called suboxone that I went on after a surgery. I stayed on my prescribed painkillers too long and when I stopped taking them I went into withdrawal. I took another painkiller for the night so I wouldn't get sick and I went on the internet the next day searching for doctors that prescribe suboxone. The suboxone made me feel completely normal again. There were no highs and lows emotionally or physically. The doc steadily lowered the dose until I came off the suboxone completely. That was 7 years ago. Suboxone is safer than methadone and it is impossible to abuse or get high on it or while taking it because it blocks the opiate receptors in the brain from "absorbing" opiates into the body. So if you take suboxone and shoot heroine, nothing will happen because those receptors are blocked.
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The best way to get completely clean from an opiate addiction is to take suboxone as directed by the doc and to attend support groups and NA meetings..also to get therapy from an addiction specialist therapist. Good luck!