... coming off for 3 or 4 weeks at a time because of deteriorating knee joints; last fall my right knee finally starting shooting pain 24/7 and I ended up on oxy contin full time from Oct through June 18 2009. After my surgery in February I got up to 400mg/day of oxycontin; then started to detox in April; It took 4 months of detox at my home to be finally off all the drugs. Then another month of sweats/chills/everything else. I have relapsed one time 2 weeks ago after a trip home to see my family but it did nothing for me and I have no desire to take anymore. My problem is depression, I got married a year and half ago as an abusive pain med user and became a full blow addict in our first year of marriage because of my knee and the surgery. Upon my return from my trip home, I told my wife I wanted to move home and did not think I wanted her there with me. I have been guilt ridden and have felt depressed every since I got back from home. I have no emotion towards my wife and hate my job, I have no idea if this is the flight mentality or if it is real and its killing me. My detox therapist and now our couples therapists both specialize in addiction and tell me its a geographic jump that will solve nothing and I have to deal with liking my self again from the shame and guilt of using for so long and getting married while using. Any insight?