... many meds. that nothing seems to work. I,ve tried almost everything, which for bipolar depression and nothing seems to work: the side effects are horrible and the detox is even worse. I'm now on Lithium and for the last pass thirty days Seroquel and zanax I would like ti be off all of it. It makes me feel worse then better. I hate for my husband to see me like this because i feel a complex to be taken theses meds. and then seeing me with the depression. He thinks a simple walk would do it. I want to be normal
I understand your frustration. I suffer from bipolar also. It has taken years, but I have been fairly stable for over 8 and although I had to change meds until I found the right combination, it was worth it. Don't condemn yourself because you have a mental illness and have to take meds. Would you feel a complex if you were diabetic and had to take insulin?
Your husband needs to educate himself about the illness. A walk does help, but certainly does not cure a mental illness. Medication sometimes and therapy are the hallmark treatments when ones brain chemistry is messed up. Just like a diabetic must monitor their blood sugar levels and take the right amount of insulin, so I have to monitor my mood ad take the right medications.
With the proper combination, you can feel "normal". So hang in there, work with your doc, and keep posting.
Do not allow anyone to make you feel ashamed of an illness. They are just ignorant of the facts and need educating. I have Fibromyalgia and depression and my ex-husband used to ridicule me and say I Was addicted to elavil, that was all that was wrong with me. He never learned so he is out of my life. I refuse to let someone do that to me. We here know what is like to have unpopular illnesses so come vent any time.
You are not alone. I am bipolar as well and antidepressants make me more depressed. My doctor tried me on some mood stablizers and they made me manic. He does not know what to do for me so is sending me on to a psychiatrist.
I think my husband is embarrassed by me because of my mood swings and that is not fair. I am always supportive when he has had problems but he doesn't seem to want to help me with mine.
Bipolar is an illness, just because you can't see it doesn't make it less real.
Just keep trying and take care of yourself
i hear your pain and i am sorry. you could try googling bipolar and when you find a site that describes your symptoms, ask your husband sweetly if you could read it to him. when you are finished ask him "who does that sound like?".
then don't discuss it, just say "i just thought this might give you a better idea of what bipolar is" you could mention that it takes a while to find just the right combo. plus, not all doctors graduate in the top 10% of their class. you just want to keep the discussion light and airy... no arguing allowed.
i know there are some people on this site who will be able to help you. it would be helpful if you did do some walking to show him you are open to his advise... since walking should be part of your lifestyle anyway. heck, go all out and buy a pedometer, that should stroke his ego. i hope you
find the right meds and that your husband treats you well, because you deserve it. also yoga and mindfulness meditation can help, but you really need the right meds to help you.
I know it can be hard! But you need to keep trying some meds until you find the right cocktail. For me it is Lithium with Manerix. I had a major depression and was hospitalized for 6 months before the doctors found this to work for me. I had side effects with Lithium for months like trembling hands. I had trouble holding a drink and writing was impossible. What kind of side effects are you having? My husband did not really believe in depression before I had that one. He got to experience it first hand. Your husband needs to understand what is happening to you. Maybe you could put some reading material about what you are going through in the bathroom where he may pick it up to read if he knows no one can see him read it. He might be curious. Also I know you want to stop searching for a med to help you but without it at this point you will not get better. Leaving a depression untreated is cause for danger and can make you worse. The worse you get the longer it will take you to come back to yourself. I know I have been there. I was hoping I would get better eventually but I only got worse and needed to be hospitalized.
Wish you the best and take care.
This is difficult at best. Yes, talk to your doctors. The shame, guilt and denial of family and friends we have all felt. Those are some of the biggest hurdles with any mental illness.
Talk to your therapist and talk to us.We have been through much of this and we do understand.
The medication cycle can be brutal. It took me 14 years to find the right combination. My major med, Viibryd, was only released in 2011 so that was part of it. Before that I must have tried them all with some success and some failures. I even tried doing without. That never worked.
My best suggestions are to repeat myself; work with your doctors, realize that the shame guilt and denial are normal, talk to therapist and talk to us.
You have a mental illness, as do I. Normal means no disfunction. That is totally doable.
I am taking 6 different antidepressants for my bipolar,depression and paranoid schizophrenia and sleep for years now. My wife and I have our ups and downs because she does not fully understand whats going on inside my head. You might do well with counseling for family. We havent but fortunately we were together for 20 years before my mental illness glared its ugly head. I had a trigger of losing my mom and have never recovered.dont stop your medication. I tried on my own before and you will get a thunder storm of pops and sparks inside you head. I had to be hospitalized for it. Good luck and God bless!
My wife of 12 years has bipolar depression. I used to feel the same as you husband and I was truly uneducated. I started do research on bipolar depression. I started going to her doctors appointments and she also started therapy to help her with some traumas in her life. I thought maybe the doctor wasn't doing his job but I was mistaken. Her doctor tried so many different medication such as seraquel, Depakoat, effexor and more. Please keep seeing your doctor! Eventually you will get the right combination of meds. It's taken a long time and she still battles with her bipolar. But she is getting better and so will you. Bipolar is a serious chemical imbalance and once you get on the right medication you will feel more balanced in your life. Hang in there it will get better. Be strong and please keep trying with your doctor. Thanks for your time and allowing me to share my wife's story.
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