I suffer from panic disorder and GAD and have been seeing a psychiatrist since early 2010. I saw two separate pdocs in 2010 and a general practitioner in early 2011 when my insurance changed. Look, I have legit needs. I'm desperate to get the help I need and I feel like every time I have to go see the doctor I have to cross my fingers to get what has helped me in the past even when I tell them what has worked. I have been through so many SSRIs, but I am still trying, and in the meantime I'd appreciate having a benzo on hand, and all of my doctors have understood this. But I moved out of state recently and I'm having a hell of a time. Here's my benzo history in a nutshell.
June 2010 - 0.5mg Klonopin #30/month for three months September 2010 - 1mg Klonopin #60 for one month then med/doc change January 2011 - 5mg Valium #30 for one month February 2011 - 5mg Valium #60/month for two months
So then I moved out of state and went a while without meds but it has gotten out of hand and I've been to the hospital twice for panic attacks and went to see a new GP in the area. The doc put me back on Lexapro and said that she wouldn't do a med like valium again long term because it's habit forming, but until the lexapro kicks in she would prescribe xanax. Then she gave me twenty 0.5mg of those. It's been about three weeks, and I'm allowed to take one per day, and she even faxed in another fill since then after I requested.
This really doesn't help me though. This is so frustrating I just don't know what to say anymore to the doctor. Xanax helps for panic attacks, but for me, having a long-acting med like valium or klonopin worked to prevent them from happening and xanax lasts like 2 hours then it's done and I'm only allowed one per day. I've tried being honest about my symptoms and how much trouble I've had with SSRIs and such, and I don't think it's getting through to her. Even with my history of having three doctors previously prescribe me one, it's not helping. I feel like there is no help. Trust me, I want something to work out in the long run that isn't addicting or habit-forming, but in the interim, it's almost imperative that I have something for emergencies or to help calm me to prevent panic.
What should I say or do? I really appreciate any help, again, I post this after reading that thread I linked to, so maybe read some of that before posting, thanks!