Hi everyone. I'm new here. And I could really use some advice.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 years and he used to be the most romantic, sweet, loving man anyone could ask for. About a year and a half ago he started experimenting with hard drugs. He has become a completely different person. He's angry, violent (not towards me) and depressed. He's always smoked pot and we would do it together alot but we never went any further than that. In the past 1 1/2 hes done pretty much every drug you can think of except heroin. Now he's really stuck on this new drug Opana (oxymorphone). He overdosed earlier this year. I had to find him dead in his friends basement, call 911 and sit in the hospital with him day and night. After that we broke up for awhile because I told him it was me or the drugs and he just couldn't stay off them. I came back, which I know probably wasn't the best but I love him, and I see the person he can be, and the person he used to be.
I should also let you know I don't do drugs. Other than the occasional blunt. I went through a minor addiction problem when I was 16, which was a good while before I met him and have not relapsed nor had the want/need to relapse since I left rehab.
Now as of 2 months ago he's doing them every night as well as selling them. There have been times where he'll nod out with a cigarette in his hand and wake up with a 2nd degree burn. He nodded out and crashed into a tree. Nothing major, thank god, but it could have been worse.
I've tried talking to him about it, fighting with him about it, leaving him. I've pretty much given up. Now I'm just trying to support him and just wait for the day he realizes he needs to get clean but I can't do it anymore. Nothing is slowing him down. I am honestly terrified for his satefy. I can't sleep at night when he's out. He's also bipolar. And I've tried talking to him about going on medication for it but he doesn't wanna hear it. And on top of all this I am worried about him commiting suicide if I leave. He has a past attempt (not the OD) and if something happened I would not be able to live with myself.
He realizes he has a problem with these, and some days he is strong, but then he resorts right back to them. I'm just at such a loss as to what to do and I can't talk to anyone about it. I don't want to leave him because I know deep down he wants help and that it's just hard for him, and I want to be there to help him. But so far everyone's saying I need to leave. I just wanna be there when he hits bottom to help him build himself back up.
I need some advice as to what to do. His addiction is worse than ever and I don't know what to do. His mother and father are addicts as well and are never around in his life. I feel like I can't go to his family. I don't know what to do.