Im intrested in taking abilfy because im currently attending a program and she is taking it and im looking for a good bipolar medicine because i was diagnosed with mood disorder last june and was prescribed seroquel 300 and doctors aren't supposed to prescribe such a high dosage at a time but at the time i felt as it was helping me and about 9 months later around march of 09 i was hospitalized again in a differant hospital and that's when they diganosed me with bipolar and boderline personiatly disorder and they lowered the pill and everything was fine for me but as months went on i began to smoke marijuana and ciggerattes and wouldnt take my medicine so i told the doctor that i was really going thru a depression and that i was started to getting panic attacks before going to bed and now i look back and think what if it might of been the fact that i was smoking ciggerates right before i drank the seroquel and whenever i drank or smoke marijuana i didnt take my seroquel like at days at a time and and i was experiencing rapid heart beat when i took it . i wanted to be on a anti depressant and the doctor prescribed me to remeron . and the few days of being on remeron were okay and then 2 weeks later i felt extreme sadness and the depression got worst . so it was really hard for me because now im currently not taking remeron and i havent took it for about 5 days now and my moods come and go and i try to avoid stressing but the bipolar feelings inside are extreme . i was so depressed on remeron where i had thoughts of sucide and i blame it on the medication . i felt as if remeron didnt even work AT all . and im only 15 and i read a lot online about medication and im also taking focalin for adhd . and i've spoke to several doctors and im starting therapy in 2 weeks and the doctors keep telling me to keep taking it and it takes a while to work but i cant take the horrible thoughts and aniexty from the pill . and im even considering to getting back on seroquel to see how that works because i've quit smoking ciggerattes [ 2 weeks now ] & quit smoking weed [ 1 month & 2 weeks now ] but what im experiencing is horrible . so i need soloutions . someone HELP .