I have been an opiate addict for 6 years. I have been addicted to every kind of opiate out there and have been on methadon for 2 years. I quit the methadone ct and it was living hell for 8 solid weeks but I did it. Then quite quickly relasped. About 6 months ago I met a friend who takes suboxone and she introduced me to a better way of handling my cravings each week. When I met her I was doing atleast one oxy 40mg a day or 10 vicodin 10s a day. Well, needless to say I began buying suboxone from her and taking it. I took 2mg twice a day at first and then went down over the last two months to 2mg only once a day. Although I am not on a very high dose, I feel like I should get into an actual suboxone treatment program. On the two mg per day I get cravings to take more all the time, and I still have cravings to use. I just dont know what to do because I live in upstate NY and it is extremely difficult to get into a clinic here. Every doctor is at capacity and cant accept new patients. When I take 4mg a day I am happy and content all day. Does this mean I am not ready to stop taking the suboxone. I do not even really want to be off the suboxone. The reason I am going down on my dose is because every month I wind up having to find subs at the end of the month when she doesnt have any more and then having to go a day or so without. It is just a huge pain and I spend 200 dollars a month, which I really cant afford, on these subs. I just do not know what to do and I need some advice. Do i work really hard to just stop the suboxone while I am already at a fairly low dose? Or do I look for a suboxone doctor and try to get in somewhere. The fact is I may not be able to get into a suboxone clinic anytime soon. I am just tired of the games and want to be done with the suboxone with a slow taper rather than wait til I run out and have to just jump off. I have six sub 8mgs right now and if I start tapering down now going from 1.5mg a day to 1mg a day to .5 and then .25, and lastly to .125. I may have to buy more but I will just deal with that when the time comes. Also, every time I have a bad day I always want to take some extra sub to make the day a little better. I just need advice. Any advice would greatly be appreciated.