I don't really know where to begin. I've been in a tremendous amount of pain this last month. My pm doc switched me from OxyContin to Fentanyl a couple of months ago. The patches seemed to be helping for a while now they are just NOT!! I have a feeling it may be because the pharmacy switched brands. They switched me from the gel type to the Mylan. I like the Mylan better because it is smaller and seems to stick better but it is just not controlling my pain. Next week I go back to the pm clinic and I can switch back to the gel patches then. I'm just not sure that's the problem.

That's not the biggest issue I'm dealing with though. I can't seem to get out of my chair for more than a few minutes at a time and that's only if I absolutely have to. I am in a really dark place right now. I know depression goes hand in hand with chronic pain but I can't even make myself care about trying to make it better. Maybe I need to get on an anti-depressant. I'm just so tired of trying to be okay. Does that even make sense? Right now I just want to give up. I know that sounds pathetic and I'm ashamed to talk to anyone in my family about it. I'm also having panic attacks (or something) where my heart starts to beat 90 miles an hour and I get real shaky. It happens anytime I try to talk about this or even think about it. The last 3 times I've been at the doctors office they've said my heart rate was up around 115 - 120. That's just when I'm trying to talk about my pain issues.

Anyway, I'm not sure what's going on or why I'm even writing this post except that I'm desperate. Any suggestions or advice would be welcome. I could really use some prayers as well. Thanks to all my friends here. I hate sounding so needy. I've always been a really strong woman but I am at a loss.
Love and hugs to all -Terri-