my son, recently out of rehab. severly depressed. should i put him in an inpatient program to address depression now that he is sober. im worried
Dear carmike602, you have a right to be worried, but I think I can help you. I have been blessed to be sober almost 17 years. I also deal with depression. I commend you for being brave & reaching out for help for your son. The more you learn about depression and addiction will help not just your son but you as well. I have a few suggestions to help you & to help keep your son on the road to recovery. One emotion your son is probably feeling is grief. He is morning the loss of his drug(s)/ alcohol. He will need to see a doctor, a phychiatrist to prescribe medication for the depression. Depending on his body chemistry he may or may not have to be on it for the rest of his life. (I will be on it for life, but that's O.K.) The next advice is to get him into meetings. Whether it is Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous or some other recovery group(s).
I strongly advise him to (1)Go to 90 meetings in 90 days;meeting makers MAKE it, (2)Get a sponcor (& CALL that sponcor every day or at least every other day for a few months, (3)Work the 12 steps of the program, (4)Get a phone list of people from the meetings (& use it), (5)Read the recommended books & literature. I propose a similar agenda for you only you should attend Al Anon. Addiction is a family disease & depression affects you & the whole family, too. Your son has to WANT to stay sober more than he wants to breathe air. Working the 12 Steps will not only help him to stay sober but it will also help him to grow up. The recovery group(s) you & he attends will become extended family to you. If he relapses, & many do, guide--not demand--him back into the program. You need to stay teachable.Good luck & God Bless You Both.
Your son is suffering from PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome) as well as I am. This is the mental phase of recovery. Google it so you understand what he is going through. I take antidepressants but they
don't help much at all. The receptors in the brain needs a long time to repair the damage done. I am in my third month and at my worst so far.
I commend his courage and wish him continued strength to get through this phase. Good Luck and God Bless. Sable
Hi, i don't want to tell you something you already know but during your sons recovery, as well as attending the meetings and using meds you need to watch him closely because it is so temping to try to have that '1' drink. The first drink is normally secretive and if you manage the '1' drink, then you start thinking, OK i've had one drink before and it was alright so maybe i'll just one drink the next night as well. You know the pattern, one drink turns to 2, etc...
And then the problem is back. Alcoholics are very very clever and are some of the best liars. Depending on the course of treatment recommended for you son, he may been given tablets to reduce the affects of withdrawal (such as Librium) or tablets to stop him drinking (Antabuse), or like the first response wrote, Anti-depressants. They won't work unless they are taken EVERY day. I learnt how to stop my tablets and found out how long after stopping i could have a drink without getting really ill. All the time convincing my family and friends i was still on them and doing well. The problem when you are worried about letting friends and family down is that you hide things and drink alone or worse. If your son is prescribed tablets, YOU must give him them every day an WATCH him take them. You must also ell him that if he is struggling, or worst scenario, has had a drink, tell him he can come to you and you won't get mad. This is really important! Sorry if you knew all this stuff before. The other thing is to get him out of the house, go shopping together, play sports, walk the dog, go for a picnic? The longer he is outside doing something the less time he will sit at home thinking about alcohol. He needs as many distractions as possible. And if he is with someone it will also ease your mind. I wish him the best of luck and please write back if you are worried about anything.
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