... seemed to work out well. 5 years ago I was scheduled for another one and after 3 injections, I was just about to go in for surgery and I had a miracle happen. I read "Healing Back Pain" from Dr. Sarno and regardless of what you think, it fixed me. I've helped so many people since then, whether it was family, friends, strangers, but this post isn't about that. I am bringing that up though because I still know that can help so many of you to skip surgery and be on the road to recovery. Google the 20/20 special with Dr. Sarno because you ever agree to surgery. I ran marathon 3 months after my scheduled surgery because of that $7 book. It's amazing.

Moving on, this time I thought and hoped it was the same situation. Unfortunately this time I really have a very bad injury. I have spinal stenosis and 2 very large herniated discs. I have seen 3 surgeons and they have all said I need a double laminectomy. Cut me open on both sides and remove the bone and take out the monster herniation. Also, the foot drop could be permanent by now because of my insurance company dragging their feet and making me wait just under 8 weeks now for approval.

Anyway, the reason I'm on here is because (1) I'm scared about the "3 strikes and you're out" that's being told to me from every doctor. I've had one surgery back there and this one is much bigger. I'm 33, a new dad, I am absolutely freaking out that this will ruin my life. Even if it helps me feel better, how can removing 2 bones to do laminectomy's, keep me safe for long? To me it seems like this will buy me time for a few years before the dreaded "strike 3" comes and I need a fusion. Then what? - I have to admit, this is he most depressed I've ever been. Mainly because of my son being 10 months old and I can't pick him up or play with him. And if I get this double laminectomy, are my days over of playing with him? Will I turn 40 and be done running around with him? Can I ever play basketball with him or softball? How is there not better improvements in the US for this horrible back injury by now?

Then the elephant in the room (besides me now that I can't work out and just eat junk all day and night). The pain pills. This pin has been SO BAD. I have cried, I have screamed, I shake, I can't brush my teeth without being in so much pain that I have to calm down for 20 minutes and pray for the pain to go away. I tried accupuncture, decompression, PT, pills, everything. I am currently on 40 mg of pure oxycodone every 6 hours. Also Gabapentin and some times Valium. But I know I need help when this is over and even now on how to get off of the pain pills. I shake, get sweaty, incredibly depressed, just flat out horror thoughts while I wait for the next dose to come save me. It's either pain or mental pain...

Will this go away? Who can I talk to? Please someone, anyone, please give me advice. I so badly want to hear that it's going to be OK and I'm over reacting but I'm so damn scared. Here comes the nice weather and my beautiful son is turning one and I am not only worried about this life changing surgery but I also have to be absolutely terrified of this drug that's been part of my life for 8 weeks and I'm supposed to just stop? I know I'm going to lose my job. I can't lose my son too.i had an injection a few days ago. It helped my pain a little. But I couldn't stop the oxy.

Please share success stories or point me in the right direction to one before I completely lose hope...

Thank you so much for reading and helping