Chronic pain I'm bone on bone surgery recommended for my spine to be rebuilt with titanium cages bars screw and after that recovery about 1 1/2 year later having my neck done. I feel like no one understands that it could possibly hurt so much I'm sick and tired of people assuming that just because they had a back problem and it was fixed with therapy that mine is that simple. The pain is torture my right leg swells and gos numb my right arm and hand go numb. I'm so lost.
I do amongst having had 13 spinal surgeries, scoliosis, osteoarthritis, spinal stenosis, and horrible daily chronic pain!! I am fused with the Titanium and the rest of the hooray at the following levels, C2-3, C3-4, C4-5, C6-7 and L3-4, L4-5 and L5-S1. I had the same problem with people and their lack of empathy. The only thing I can tell you is something my surgeon told me when I asked him in tears many years ago, "Why don't they get that I'm in pain, the kind you wouldn't wish on your worst friend, but you wish that those people could spend one day in your shoes, so they'd know?" He said to me, Kymm it's not an injury that people can see, you aren't wearing a cast for a broken arm or leg. It's an unseen injury causing pain so bad you are brought to tears at times, but to them you are either exaggerating or being a big baby.
You must always remember that pain is a very personal thing, no one can feel anthor's pain. Their broken toe may be as painful to them as your spinal problems are to you, so now when someone says to me that they are in pain that I would think to be minor, hurts or that they are in pain, I empathize with them because to them their pain IS as bad as mine!! Just continue to try and explain this to them, and some will get it and others, well they just don't get it and will always think whatever they think, you have no control of what others say and it shouldn't matter! You do what you need to do to feel better, so that you can try and get some semblance of a "normal" life! If you need to lay down do so, if you just want to be left alone than do that to. I warn you though you may start losing friends because it's hard to plan anything with them because you never know how you'll feel that day, or they want to just come over and you're in the middle of a really bad spasm and just want to take your meds and lay down. I lost all my friends for these exact reasons, I look at it as "Well I guess they weren't real friends when it mattered most!" It's lonely, but in my case, I thank God every day that I have learned to walk again after breaking my neck and back 30 years ago in a freak waterskiing accident. My former dreams and ambitions were gone in an instance and I needed to start working on new ones, and believe me, it's very hard, but I did find new ones, when I was done grieving the loss of my former life. There will always be judgmental people, you just have to be true to yourself and your pain and needs, or you'll go crazy worrying about what others think!
I have just recently figured out how to let go and let God take over and has made the difference in my life that I haven't had in the past 13 years I have blames everyone but myself for my depression and ill attitude to my family and friends as well as turning my back on God for so long and blaming him for not stepping in without me asking. You notice that was my key word "without me asking"... I was taking my relationship for granted that it would always be what it is no matter what I did I have been taking my kids about apostate and the sins of apostate in the book of Romans and it hit me so hard because it was me I was talking about I was shown those chapters because it was me that needed to read them and not my kids... you to take my kids about apostate.
my big fans were abuse of medication neglecting my family and taking life for granted as it was supposed to be handed to me and not earned by me. Those times of ended and the old Scott is back.just remember James chapter 5:12-20 & add Romans chapter 1:21-32 & 2:1-16... that is what base my personality and self-presentation as well as try to live my life by those chapters.y'all are welcome to talk to me anytime you want to I love to gab and run my mouth. You can actually send me private messages if you want to if you have something you want to discuss with just me I leave my private open. Headed to church have a great day
I am sorry to hear you have to go through such surgeries. For me the worst is not being understood by insensitive blobs. I had the neck fusions and let me tell you I feel some difference but at this point not a whole lot of difference before the surgery. I am still on the same pain medicine and just a day ago I thought I would stop the breakthrough meds to see where I stood and I realized that I am not standing at all. Hurts like hell! I am just glad I have these meds. Just if you are suffering then TELL YOUR DOCTOR. You must tell them even if when you do see them all you want to do is just get back home to your bed. I know that words won't do much but you can do it. Just don't hold back when you are with your Doctor.
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