I'm married with 2 kids, and my wife is no longer interested in sex, to the point where we maybe have sex maybe 3-4 times a year. It's always the same, and usually isn't very passionate or exciting. I've tried everything including backrubs, talking, cuddling, being romantic, etc. She doesn't want to talk about the issue, but she also doesn't want to leave. I love her and fantasize about her all the time, and I also don't want to leave. The problem is that my sex drive and lack of fulfilment is causing me depression, frustration, and resentment. Should I consider Zoloft to reduce my sex drive and help with the associated depression?
Depression - Using Zoloft to intentionally decrease sex drive?
- 4 Nov 2013 by legolas1984
- 24 September 2014
Added 4 Nov 2013:
Yes, I've tried date nights, and I've told her about some simple fantasies/role playing, etc that we could try, but she isn't interested. She is in her late 30s, and has had body/self esteem issues our entire relationship, despite me telling her over and over how she is sexy and beautiful. I've been forced to satisfy myself, and I almost considered an affair, but I really just want to be with her. It's getting to the point where I'm losing my patience with her, and I feel very very resentful. If I don't address the issue, it may lead to divorce at some point. I'm willing to go on Zoloft to knock out my sex drive, alleviate my depression associated with the lack of intimacy, and help deal with her high stress personality caused by her demanding career.
Added 4 Nov 2013:
I make dinner most of the time, and I take care of both kids by myself while she travels to lavish conferences 10 weeks a year. I feel like my life is all work, and that we're merely roommates now, with no hope for any kind of intimacy or excitement in sight. My options are divorce, an affair, or medication. I can't continue as I am now, as my resentment and dissatisfaction is causing our relationship to spiral. I wouldn't need an SSRI if it weren't forthis situation, however I think it may help with the dissatisfaction, depression, frustration, and stress.
Added 5 Nov 2013:
Thanks. I'm going to try for an affair first. If that doesn't work, I'll give the Zoloft a try, and lastly I'll file for divorce. I don't want to cheat, but I feel I have no other choice. I can't be any more romantic or do any more work around the house. I don't feel guilty at this point, as I feel that wives who aren't intimate deserve what they get. I can't believe some women can have sex with their husbands 3 times during a year, and then they act surprised when their husbands cheat.
Have you tried date nights? How long have you been married? I wouldn't turn to a drug to decrease sex drive because of one issue. If your truly depressed than yes it may help. You also never said how old she is, sex drive decreases in your 40's.
She's in the age where taking care of 2 kids, the house, you and a high stress job will just wear her out. She might be just too plain tired. The sexiest thing my hubby could have done for me at that time in my life was to have dinner ready when I got home, and do the dishes.
I hope things are better for you. What state are you in? Maybe we could exchange emails and possibly meet someday. You sound like a great catch... and sexy, too! It wouldn't hurt to chat a bit.
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