any support or advice would be appreciated... i really want to doze off...
If you really want to doze off take Benadryl. Or add Melatonin to the Benadryl. Maybe get some trazodone.
What you want to do can easily lead to opiate addiction or dependency. Apparently you don't know just how quick and easily this happens. Go to a NA meeting. Tell them, or ask them this. Many people will warn you. I can't even begin to count how many people I have met that got started doing what you want to do.
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