OK I am now 25, but when I was 14 I went threw a lot of bad stuff and found myself in, Fieldstone, a mental hospital in battle creek, mi. that was closed down for patient treatment and over dosing. While i was in there i was put on depakote 600mg 3-4 times a day, i followed this for 2 years. i was put on it for bipolar mania. this was when the drug first came out and was not widely known or understood. while i was on it i could not function, it was like i was dead. half of the time i couldn't get out of bed or off the couch to use the bathroom. i was so weak that more often than not i would miss school, or if i took it while i was at school i would miss the bus home or just fall asleep where ever i was. i tried to tell my doctors it wasn't right and it made me feel horrible, i had waking dreams where i died and constantly thought of killing myself and others, (the blood in the stool and urine was hard to talk about but they tried blaming that on bladder infections and ulcers). but now i look at all the stuff i had and it says to stop taking. there was no build up to the 600mg ether that is what i was started on and staid on for the whole time. the only reason i got off it was i started cheeking it and flushing it down the toilet. after about a week when it got out my system i sat down and expressed myself and my father and aunt took me off of it against doctors orders. in their defense the doctor didn't speak English and all he would say in "ok-ok" and "increase dosage" i swear to you he knew no more English than that.

ok so here's my question(s)
1. i still have health problems that i can't help but think are long term problems from when i was on it, anyone else have these problems if so please let me know.

2. who should i talk to about these questions about this drug? i'm not out for money i just wanna get help to feel normal