Hello I'm new here and yes I'm bipolar. I was wondering if anyone in this group has and compulsive spending habit and how do you deal with it. I have dealt with this for years but know its gotten way out of control, I've put my hubby and I in debt 10,000.00 that hubby knows nothing about. plus nothing to show for it as I look around..Pls any suggestions would help. My medication is Depakote ER 1500mg daily.
I have done that kind of thing myself and since I hadn't been diagnosed as Bipolar yet I didn't know what was going on. I really have to watch myself even now to avoid getting carried away with buying everything I want.
Have you talked to your doctor about this? Depakote is okay as a mood stabilizer but I found it did nothing for compulsiveness, in fact I think it made it worse.
I really think you need to talk to your doctor about this as there are many other meds that can help and Depakote obviously isn't doing enough for you.
Hello - I am bipolar as well and yes I have taken part in compulsive spending. I was married 15 years and hid much from now ex-husband. Although, it was not the contributing factor to the end of my marriage, it certainly played a part. Honestly, I do not think medication can help this. I take Lithium which is similar to Depakote. Compulsive spending in my opinion is like an addiction. I used to get a "high" from it. I had to admit I had a problem and get help. Now I know this may not be the case for you, but it can be a sign that you are in the mania part of bipolar. The good news is that you can get help. Behavior modification can help. If you can seek out a therapist for this issue. I enrolled in a debt management program that consolidated my 35k in debt. I paid a monthly payments each month that took me 4 years to complete. I am happy to say I just made my final payment. :). Bipolar can be so baffling and it takes it's toll on us.
It's the nature of the "beast"... but please know you are NOT alone. Reaching out for help on here was a good first step. Best wishes to you... if you can, reach out to your husband and talk to him about what has occurred with your spending. Maybe together you can work on the debt and get some help. Don't allow the compulsive spending enslave you anymore. Hugs to you. Take good care.
Fess up to your husband and cut up the credit cards. You are going to lose the husband by doing this and not telling him. At some point you will need a car or something and the whole thing will be out there. Then get to the psychiatrist and get your bipolar under control. This is the beginning of great troubles. You know it. Please choose wisely.
Hi. Overspending is a typical bipolar symptom. I did this too many times. One time I came home after I had this humungous spending spree. My husband looked at me in this strange way, and I asked him if I spent too much money, then he gave me this other unusual look. The next day I went to each store in the mall where I spent money and returned these items, one by one, saying the same embarrassing thing after another, "I bought these, but I can't really afford them." That was 40yrs ago. I haven't done it since. My question is, why can't you see where the money went?
L, Anna aka:pickles503
Hi Big Spender,
I remember when I went through a really hard time in my life. I had moved into another province and had no job, no food or anything. I got bored and needed something so I went and bounced some checks. It became a habit during that time and I finally got caught. I was brought to jail and fingerprinted and all that. Stayed there overnight and went back home. That was an eye opener. Scared the shit out of me. And when I was on my feet again I had a year to pay each of those stores back. When I went to court for judgement I got one year probation and paying everyone back. I never forgot it and I never did it again! That was a long life lessons to say the least!
So get help and take meds if you have to because otherwise you could end up in jail away from your family with a record.
Good luck and take care,
I want to update my current situation. I've been reading everyone's opinion. I understand compulsion spending goes along with this deaseae. I want you guys to know I given my credit card to my husband last night. He did not ask me how much was charged onto that account and I did not volunteer as he shredded it. The point is its out in the open put he did say I will be responsible for the monthly bill. We all know there is no such thing as a miracle pill. So, what do you guys do to curve the impulse or that urge you need to buy that make you feel good and happy knowing it's temporary feeling?
I have the same issuses I don't have credit cards or a bank card I only use cash I take just the amount I need and no more than $10 extra incase I forget the dish soap.Make a list and stick only to your list.As far as the hubby he needs to know a.s.a.p. the longer it goes on the worse it gets.He will flip out but will still love u in the long run.Tell him that you need help.
I do have a great deal of trouble with the compulsive spending. only thing that helped me is having to be accountable big time. to the point that your money is monitored. sounds crazy, but I only get money here & there so I don't buy bigger things. it sucks but if you don't your marriage could be in jeopardy, support is key to getting control. you will still get the urges though just so you know.
Hi, i'm sorry for the late reply, i've only just come across your post. I also have problems with compulsive spending, have done most of my life. Over the last few years i have been diagnosed as having BPD. I see that most people with this issue have Bipolar, but it is also a common symptom with people who have BPD. It didn't help that i had a high paid job at a very young age, and at that point i hadn't built up any debts because of my age. I would be really reckless with my spending, buying whatever i wanted, supporting both me & my boyfriend, not thinking about saving or anything sensible like that! Soon, i was applying for a credit card, then a loan, then another loan... I lived in debt from then on. In 2010 i lost my job and that is when everything caught up with me - i had to declare financial crisis and took out a DRO (debt relief order).
From that date i wouldn't be able to apply for any credit for 5 years! So i am still in this situation now, but have since racked up 3 more credit cards in other names (family - they are aware of it). I wish i had been diagnosed much earlier in life, and counselled and medicated and maybe i wouldn't be in this mess now. Saying that, the DRO wiped out a lot of my debts, and now i am having to live within my means, so it was the best thing that could happen. I have no choice now but to start paying back debts, and am prevented from getting in to any more! I would say that declaring financial crisis is sometimes the only way to go. This is the only way that i am going to get straight. It isn't a nice thing to have to do, but honestly, it is probably the way to go.
Up date: Today I deleted all my e-mail advertisements, such as JC Penney's, Macy's, Belk's, etc. I sure don't need to know anything concerning upcoming sales.
It's just so easy to open accounts, which I don't want. As the junk mail comes, I no longer look at the ads, they go straight to the trash can. Thanking of other ways to use my spare time other then spending... This is hard, very hard, Kind of being on a diet and trying not to fail.. Just taking one day at a time here, but I feel as if Im getting stronger, and more confidence in myself... B-)
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