I'm stuck at home all day with no car. The few friends I have all work and none of them really know the truth about my addiction. I have no family support because I keep my addiction a secret. They wouldn't be too happy with me. I live with my parents and fear they would kick me out or they would just judge me and hate me. They're not the easiest people in the world to deal with. The stomach problems, the hot/cold sweats, the sleepless nights... those are all things I can put up with... sort of. The WORST part is my mind. It won't stop telling me to get together some money and use. It's hard to busy myself around the house with little "projects" because my body is worn down by the detox. I have a loooooooong history of depression, OCD, and post traumatic stress disorder. Does anyone know what this is like? Has anyone found a way to fight through the thoughts? Through your brain getting the best of you? Sheesh, this is all so hard. It's about the 100th time I've put myself through this, too. Will I ever learn? :( I have no one to blaim but myself.