Citalopram - Am I being too impatient?

i think i have been on every antidepressant known to mankind, except MAO Inhibitors, and most have not worked, or caused untenable side effects, caused me to quickly become extremely manic and spend $20,000.00 in 2 days, i just wanted to dig a bigger, deeper, darker, slimier hole and climb in pulling the top over my head and just live in total darkness and silence until i died a slow starvation death but relatively quick death due to dehydration. I am quite adroit at plannning death senarios in my head and also writing them down. The last one I made the mistake of telling someone and my lil sweet fluffy arse ended up on the locked down ECT unit at the University Hospital... the big one in this area. To tell you the truth, i don't care for ECT very much as it is unbelievably barbaric (although not as bad as the one scene in 'one flew over the cuckoo's nest', but the effects are almost immediate and in a week or two after your game/set/match of them,you are back to normal or whatever your stable state is called and there you will be until the next time. That is the option i always save for last... when i do in fact become suicidal and this time homicidal as well, the speed. i tried a new thing this time also, found mea great shtink. Usually i hate my shrinks and refuse to see them very often, but this is the first shrink in 20 years I like, besides the new one reminds me of my favorite old one that has, since the last time I saw him in FLORIDA, freaking went and died on me (anyway i would rather titrate my own medications to how I feel. I did have one nasty shrink that all he evereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, oops fell asleep, anyway he wanted to talk about my sex life since I was in between husbands at the time. He had this big dark green couch with lot of big pillows, i thought he would attack me, so i'd sit with pillows protecting me. he was nasty.
So, to your problem with celexa. all ssri's are lmost the same except for a few atoms added in different places, changes there mode of action some but nothing to shake a stick at. But, as all humans are unique unto themselves, some react to one molecular model of a ssri better than to the next one. tht's why the pharmaceutical companies keep coming out with more and more of them you were off celexa and on something else for 3 weeks and as your celexa levels in your body dropped, it noticed the change. Since you were now feeding it lexapro, your body and mind decided to go on strike until you started feeding it celexa again. I think your body wanted you to never do that again so it is presently telling you 'mom... we like celexa, and if you don't give us celexa, this is what we r gonna do to you!' WOW!!! Now add in whatever the lunar phase we are presently in, stir in some pre or peri-menopausal crazy symptoms, body heat thermoregulation unit malfunction and a little bad weather and that equals the MOOD you are now experiencing. don't worry, it will soon be better. when the celexa level approaches therapeutic levels, thn and only then. So sit back in your little roller coaster chair, strap in so you don't fall out and get yourelf ready for the ride. It shouldn'tbe too much longer
Your Karma's Shifting ,
The Pychobabble Hippie