Bipolar Disorder - am I crazy?

It's very common what you are experiencing. We often do some outrageous things during Manic Episodes that we would NEVER do otherwise.
Are you on any type of mood stabalizer?
***If not, you NEED to be.
***if you are, talk to your doc about something different b/c it's NOT working (Unless you're just starting a new med... give it a little time).

There were SO many times I quit taking my meds, even though they were helping some, b/c I wasn't getting the effects I wanted or expected. I've been on Lamictal for 2 years now and my husband says it's a miracle drug. It's really not. Works for some folks and others it doesn't. BP meds are one thing that have to usually be "played around with" and adjusted or changed several times until you find your "perfect" therapy. Also, sometimes after being on a drug therapy that worked for several years, symptoms will begin to reappear and meds changed.
When I first began the Lamictal for my moods, my family and friends noticed a good change in me, but I still would have the DEVIL moods as I call them, but they were DRASTICALLY decreased. Once in a while I will have one, but like my husband said, Non Bipolars have bad days so my "new" mood swings are totally normal and harmless (besides a little name calling here and there... :-0 ).
Good Luck... hang in there... you are NOT alone and you are NOT crazy!!!

Hi I am Jan.

I agree with ((TURTLE)) totally. have you called your pdoc about this and also if you don't have one please get into therapy, I also get irritated a lot and one time although doesn't sound that bad but I got so angry I wanted to punch out my husband I didn't but I picked up this really really heavy but candle and threw it into our wall the hole was huge and I felt much guilt afterwards it was tremendous.

I often callmy old therapist to get back in check since I was in therapy for so long she talks to me on the phone some times is I don't abuse it.please you can get anger management therapy it really works

Good luck to you and stay in contact with the group here and get the support you need support is crucial are you getting the support from home if not tell your doctor you wants to bring a loved one with you so they can understand
My pdoc tells me to do that I bring my husband sometimes I call pdoc it is (psychiatrist)

LOL peace to u jan