I am having a very hard time with being in gut wrenching pain and barely being able to walk and coping with my life and family. Pain has turned me into a person very hard to live with as my family has told me so. I am short tempered, snappy and very depressed. I am on two forms of anti depressants. Not helping at all. Medication doesn't help much. I have tried most everything, nothing helps much. I feel I am driving everyone away. Any help would be appreciated
Let me start by stating I Feel Your Pain, not the same pain or worse. I have many suggestion that have been advised to me, maybe you have heard all the same. So here they are; Yoga, Meditation, walking & stretching ect·, The Pain Clinic(if possible?) Physical Therapy, Chiropractor. Unfortunately the source of one of my issues needs Surgery I can't have because our Ins. CO. Plan we carry does not cover this area. As far as the family goes, I experience the same with my husband, No Empathy! Have you or thought of speaking to a therapist? I do and she's wonderful and understanding in issues of Chronic Pain as well as family issues. I know I couldn't give much to go with, I guess that I just wanted you to know your not alone.
Your medications, the antidepressants may actually increase your short tempered behavior, if indeed you actually ARE short tempered and "difficult to live with." I question that, as I wonder IF your family understands why you are in such pain, and do they understand how bad the pain is? Sometimes our family members can exacerbate our pain, by not understanding, not taking the time to read up on our diagnosis, which they should DO!
Back to your antiD's, have you taken a look at the side effects? Just read the side effects about your meds right here, above, in the blue bar, Drugs A to Z. You may find some interactions with your medications that do indeed cause irritability, or not.
IS your pain being helped by your doctor(s)? Do you need a pain medication to help you live your life to it's fullest, or to a better extent? Are you taking an antidepressant because of pain, or are you currently depressed? Do you have a Pain Management Doctor, or some type of doc that can address your pain, be it Chronic Pain or temporary?
These are questions that if answered may garner you more answers to your own query.
Best wishes, Smileyzz,
It is hard to live in pain 24/7 and people who dont just dont get it. Even ones who try truly dont understand. Only other pain patients truly understand. One thing I have learned is to adjust my expectations. I know that no matter what I take, I will never be pain free but I have been working towards finding a pain level I can live with. I finally found a compassionate Dr willing to work with me and we are getting closer than I have been in years to having a tolerable level of pain. It is often a LOT of trial and error to find the combination that works best for you. It can be time consuming and financially consuming but worth it if you find that combination that works best to give you a pain level you can live with. I tried a lot of different meds and combinations before I found something that works more often than not. I still have bad days, yes, but at least not every day is a bad day!
My family is not very compassionate at all. My husband especially. He has absolutely no empathy for anyone. He is just not capable of it. I accept that now even though some days I wish I could visit my pain on him for a few hours just to show him what it is like (or knock him in the head with a baseball bat! lol). He just doesnt understand why I cant clean the house like I used to. (My pain is back related) I still work, thank God for telecommuting! He doesnt understand why on weekends I dont feel like running all over town either and he will call me lazy, but whatever. I know that on good days I do more and on bad days I dont do more than I have to. I'm sure he is a little resentful at having to pick up the extra tasks some days but he did promise to love me for better or worse and in sickness and health! You do have to learn not to let pain consume you. This site helps me a lot to get my mind off of things and I read A LOT! My husband doesnt understand that reading is my coping mechanism either. Reading keeps my mind off my pain. I do try to get some exercise every day and many days I have to really push myself but if I dont move around some, the pain gets worse. Sometimes I just dont know how I will manage to get me and the dog around the block but when I do, it is surprising how much better I feel for having done it! Set small goals for yourself. Start with easily attainable goals and work your way up. Remember that your family is not responsible for your pain so try not to take it out on them. Find a psychiatrist in your area. See about CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). Ask at your local hospital who is in your area, even if you have to drive a bit and do it once a month or so, it can be of great help to you. Yoga is good for pain patients. See if you can find someone who works with chronic pain patients. It will help you to learn to relax and to learn mind/body control. Learning to relax is a biggie. Dont over tax yourself as much as possible. You have to learn to let some things go and come to grips with life as it is. Celebrate the joys you DO have and let go those thoughts about what you used to be able to do. When I have pain, I turn to my friends who know chronic pain on this site. There are a lot of us in the same boat and we do understand how much of an effort is is some days just to get a shower and get dressed! lol Sometimes it is just good to know that someone, somewhere understands! Welcome aboard and feel free to vent any time you want!! What are friends for if not to lend an ear or a shoulder once in a while!
Hello smileyzz. I suggest focus. In as concentration. It might sound harsh, however throughout my life time, and having gone through and still having physical pain, concentration, taking the onus of the pain, in my case has helped. Not a cure, but certainly an aid. Regards pledge
So sorry to hear about your pain. You will find a lot of us on here that are also having to cope with severe pain. You are wise to look for coping mechanisms to help it. I would be interested in what works for you. One of my neurologists thinks that biofeedback might work for me. Another one didn't think it would work on the severity of the pain that I have. Have you tried that? I would be interested if it did or didn't work for you.
I do have to tell you that I got severely depressed because of my chronic severe pain and not being able to do much of anything. I had looked forward to a short trip to see my stepson get married, but spent the entire trip in bed with a severe migraine and had to go to the ER. I was on an anti-depressant at the time, but it wasn't working, the way that you say that yours aren't working. My doctor advised me to increase it and get therapy. I told her that because my depression was so situational I was positive that no drug could possibly make a difference. I never got the therapy, but did increase the anti-depressant. To my great shock, a month later, the depression went away completely!!! It also reduced the pain some since anti-depressants are natural pain killers. I haven't felt depression since and that was 2 years ago. I still struggle with a very limited life, hardly ever go out because it drives my migraines way up. And I still struggle with severe pain for days at a time, but it is often moderate to mild now with all the many treatments and meds that I am now taking. And I also have pain from other medical problems as well. So just to tell you because increasing the dose of your anti-depressant MIGHT help you. And maybe not, but thought that I should share it with you.
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