... Last year (2011), I think it started to have a in-home caretaker. I'll have somebody to come for four hours. .Their duties were the basics my main and very important to have somebody to take me to my doctors appt. They do things that I can't do.

I was told in the beginning, that I'll have a "parmaement" worker... I don't think they knew the definition of "permanent". This was the company I started with. In the beginning, the first womant she sat down for a break out of the blue she took out a sandwich baggy full of pot! OMG, at first we didn't know what to say or do it was such a shock. Anyway... To make a long story short. I'm not kidding but we went through 23, both men and women. I feel like I did something wrong? I'm easy going I don't feed people crap.

After all this, the case manager decided to revinew my case, and see if a different company will be suitable for me. OK. I have a hard time in trusting people it takes time to build trust, right? I'm a very emotional person. The desicions part... I have a hard time in making decisions - simple ones. I suffer from anxiety and depression, and among , other medicial conditions. So, whenever something comes up with the worker ther they quit the job or was a replacement cause ofne the company so I get a new one... here we go again. After just about a year almost.

Every single time tlhis happens I get all this feelings physical, mentally, emotion. There are days I don't feel like talking. This case workers don't understand completely about my medical history my disability--- my daily routine how much it means to me "mentally." I guess I suffer from OCD?
Thank you for reading.

P.S. I hope everybody understands where I'm coming from. Sorry to stop writing my hand is cramping.