So here is what I think happened that night. I was puffing on the electric cigarette quite a bit that night, even though I knew puffing on it irritated my bronchial passages/lungs another time. I also smoked 1 or 2 cigars that night. And then I had the extreme shortness of breath attack. Which has not reoccurred now in 3 days. But I haven't puffed on the e-cig anymore.

I wrote a long post which was lost. In it I explained that 5 years ago something happened that matched the description of a heart attack. I went to an ER and was admitted. However, the EKG and the blood work didn't show I had a heart attack. Good. So they did the usual heart tests, and a nuclear Stress Test. I failed that test and was told it doesn't show them what is wrong, but only that something is wrong. Then they ordered an angiogram. There were a lot of people who needed one, and after waiting 2 days I was finally brought down for the angiogram. It was done by a very young cardiac intern, who was not being supervised by an older more experienced doc. I had an angiogram done once before and the cardiologist who did it took 45 minutes to examine my arteries and heart. But this time the young intern did it in 25 minutes. He was being rushed. There were simply too many people who needed 1 done. I made matters worse by speaking to him through most of the test. I didn't understand how the test worked yet. Now I do. He needed to be concentrating on nothing but the test. Not me kidding around with him. But that's what I was doing. So he found nothing wrong. I protested that the Stress test showed something was wrong, at which point they said the Stress test must have been wrong. No, how about the angiogram was done wrong? But oh no, they wouldn't even consider that. So in spite of ever worsening symptoms, no cardiologist would take me seriously for the next year. I finally gave up. I tried again 2 years ago, and I went to a cardiologist who was hell bent on doing a stress test, because he did them in his office and made big bucks on them. And then my insurance ran out. We never even did the stress test, much less him sending me for an angiogram. He didn't do angiograms. It seems you need to know what a doc does before you go to him, assuming you know what you need, and I need an angiogram done.

This brings me to now. I know of a cardiologist who I believe does his own angiograms and surgery. One problem is he's far away, but I think I can get a ride. The other is I don't have the co-pay insurance this month. I need $115 to get that insurance for 1 month. I live in a state that does car inspections, and I need roughly $200 to fix my car so it can pass inspection. I don't have any of this money. I may have some of it by Oct 27th. Maybe. So can you see my predicament? This is why I haven't gone to an ER. I don't know what to do. In the past I was scared stiff to get heart surgery. I'm still scared, but now I want it. If restoring the proper blood flow to my heart can make me feel OK again, then I want it. I'm sick of feeling tired all the time, and getting exhausted just going up steps. I'm 59 but I think I feel like I'm 99. I know of people in their late 80's and early 90's who feel better than me. And so now this triggers off my depression and anxiety. A friend gave me 2 Xanax yesterday and I'm about to use them up already.

I just don't know what to do.