| || |
Weaning off Suboxone, So far so good!
If you read a couple top threads on this subforum you will find there are many users who have been on subs for 5+ years that are currently making the jump, and they are surviving. I was taking subs for nearly two years, opiates for four. I am currently on day 22 and it gets better each day.
First two weeks had a rough time with sleep but it is coming better now. I think the mental part of it is a big part and I was a little horrified of the W/D stories that I had read before but you have to have a solid mind set. You survived, thrived before substance and you CAN and WILL (IF you chose) go on without.
I have seen a lot of sleepless nights in my lifetime from other substance abuse so I wasn't to worried about not getting sleep, was just pretty inconvenient. I figured if I didnt loose my marbles I would be alright and when my body needed sleep, it would get some. The worst I think is the sweats along with the phantom pains in your joints. I noticed from going through WDs off pills rather than the sub I had it a lot more in my ankles/knees but this time around my elbows and knees were the culprits.
To this I can give you this advise;
2) HYDRATE H20/Electrolyes
Wish you the best of luck, keep us updated!
Hi thanks for responding so soon! Trying to occupy my time today (should be doing homework!!!). My ankles are the worst...its more of an annoyance then anything else but I've gotten accustomed to being able to be pain free whenever I want to be. I guess the positive is that my nerves are in full force...lol. Check, check and check. I took this vitamin called leg cramps from walmart, its all herbs. It instantly stopped the achy legs and ankles which I'm really relieved about. My biggest worry is the RLS I can't stand it. Thats usually what gets to me and makes me cave. Also the exhaustion...I have 3 kids and I feel EXtremely guilty not being able to do much for myself let alone my family. I hate feeling like a burden, I'm usually go go go Mom. I know its a process but I just want to get back to my old self so I can get on with my life already. Congrats on your 22 days!!! I know how hard that has to be, god I can't wait to say that! You should be extremely proud of yourself 6 years you have overcome. I have been taking potassium and this leg herbal supplement has been heavenly, and so far no RLS. If your having trouble still with your legs (not sleeping) I recommend those two things. I heard theres a big link between RLS and potassium. I'm working toward my nursing degree so I know a little about a little...and I know potassium plays a huge role in muscle contraction. So it makes sense...
I'm just a big fan of sleep. I can deal during the day but messing with my sleep is like chinese torture...Anyways thank you for the advice and Congrats on your 22 days!!! I'm excited for you! Can't wait to say that myself...I will def keep posting! This helps a lot in itself..
Oh, Also what dose did you drop from?? Just curious.
Last edited by GettinItOverWith; 03-26-2014 at 01:57 PM.
Were you stable at each dose before reducing from 1 mg eventually down to .125 mg? If so, you should eventually stabilize at .125 mg. When you feel as stable as possible (mild to no WD symptoms), you can go ahead and start your skip days. According to the sub taper plan by Robert_325, you skip 1 day, dose .125 mg. Skip 2 days, dose .125 mg. And so on..until you've skipped 4 days total. At that point you jump as the half-life has caught up with itself.
Yes, the menal/emotional fear is daunting. But it can be done! Sounds like you're doing well with supplements and such. Do you have a plan to stay clean long term? Like NA or AA?
Stay well hydrated and exercise as much as possible.
Great!!! Thank you so so much! I'm excited/nervous. But so far its not bad at all. I am shocked as to really how easy it is to wean. Dropping off at a high dose is NOT the way to go. As with most medications. Weaning is the key here I see. Wish I would've tried this months ago! Just afraid of experiencing what I always have before trying to jump from a larger dose. This is amazing...I have a very mild/annoying stomach ache and little bit of achy legs..low energy but nothing some vitamins and tylenol wont manage. Nothing too terrible. It seems the symptoms themselves aren't bad at all....its just that when you go so long not feeling any pain to feeling normal everyday ailments its an adjustment. Your "normal" everyday person would just tough out a mild stomach ache, but to me this is a feeling I haven't felt in a while. Its been a long time since I've felt any sort of pain, even mild Lol...guess thats a blessing. I can FEEL period. Good or bad. My nerves are working. I picked up some L Theanine (a calming vitamin) and some energy chews today from gnc...along with some Taurine for energy if I need it. I am stocked up to the point of being cracked out on energy supplements if I need them lol. Just as a back up. I can't stand being exhausted. To anyone reading I cannot rave enough about this "leg cramps" vitamin from Walmart. Lifesaver for achy legs and so far no RLS!!!!! RLS is the devil ugh. Plus my potassium supplement I'm sure that helps a lot too. If I can get through that and get some sleep I can get through anything. Just some achy legs and mild stomach ache. I'm good! I am a weakling! If I can do this you can do this people! I appreciate the weaning advice I'm gonna give it a go as soon as I feel stable. I guess the trick is weaning and pumping your body with the right vitamins through the process. I read some advice that says its much like taking a tylenol at the start of a migraine as opposed through full blown migraine. Have to give the vitamins time to build up in the system. I am syked this is working so well!!! God bless the people on this site. You will help change many many peoples lives ::::tear:::: I am thankful. As soon as I stabilize I will keep everyone posted for my skip days attempts!!! N/A isn't an option right now, I'm considering maybe finding some online forums. Honestly you guys here have helped me so much.
Last edited by GettinItOverWith; 03-26-2014 at 05:57 PM.
Just curious...any idea when the stomach ache goes away? Thats really the only thing thats bothering me right now. It started this evening and I've been burping more then usual. (Never burp really...). I guess it feels kind of like indigestion. A little bit of a burning/achy/annoying feeling...and the burping. I don't know if you remember experiencing that? Its just annoying...hoping it will go away soon! I'm at the end of day 3 of dropping to .125 mg.
Hi getting i saw where you posted to me on another thread and wanted to say hello to you on your thread. Kath already pointed out to you about the same thing i would point out. I see where you were having a little stomach issues earlier so hopefully it is just a 1 day thing for you. I never experienced it myself when i tapered off. You are now at the point where it can become more mental of a challenge. I weaned down to about .18 spent 6 days there then did the skip days and had very minor symptoms. The only thing i can think of to offer you any advise here is this as far as jumping goes. When you get to skip day 1 you are trying to go 48 hrs with out dosing. If for some reason you would get to feeling really uncomfortable befor 48 hrs dose and then next dose go further in hours. I have read just a few threads where a person has skipped just a little slower then the taper plan but jumped off ok. I noticed you said that NA is not an option for you right now. I wont ask you why but just want to point out to you that a persons odds are so much higher of staying clean with a recovery program. I wont go into my long history of alcohol and opiate use and repeated failures of staying clean but will just say this. When i have followed Alex recovery program i failed. Theres a saying getting clean was easy it is staying clean that is hard. My best wishes to you and will talk with you later.
The only time I ever really experienced nausea or a stomach ache is when I was in WD from opiates. I haven't had any tummy trouble during my sub taper, though. I would try something like Mylanta or any other OTC stomach med to help with that. I've heard that ginger soothes the stomach, but I've never tried it. Like Alex said, hopefully it's a temporary thing.
Originally Posted by GettinItOverWith
I think once we get down to such low doses our bodies are probably confused and scrambling to adjust. Hang in there. You're doing great!
Well everyone in my house has been complaining of a stomach ache. So I believe its just a virus or indigestion from something we ate. I feel much better today stomach wise. A little tired and not all that motivated but thats to be expected, my achy legs are getting better. I might stay where I'm at through the weekend and start my first skip day Monday! I really hope I feel like you did Alex! As far as N/A ( I know excuses excuses I would go if I had the time to go. My problem is I am a student and I have 3 children and no one really to watch them my life is very hectic. I don't have any friends that use, and I don't know anyone that does aside from myself and my husband who was recovering from an accident. How I fell into this trap was I was started on a prescription of Nycenta (Nucenta sp??) which was supposedly NON ADDICTING---(((NOT)))...due to a crushed broken Big toe for a few weeks, and then went on from there. Before that I never touched the stuff. At the same time my husband was recovering from an accident and had to have several surgeries and be in pain management for a little while, I had to care for him with my broken toe (the toenail was still crushed so it was painful to walk still) I was in a special shoe for a few weeks..so he gave me his meds to help me run around and take care of him and the kids. From there I kept going with my excuses until I one day tried to quit cold turkey and realized it had a hold of me. He was ready to stop and switched to suboxone to wean off and after trying cold turkey to quit a few times because I didn't like the meds anymore but was more chasing off the withdrawals. I heard it was much easier to wean with and decided I needed it too, in order to completely stop this rollercoaster nightmare. I realized at the same time I had no control with the pills to wean as well. The good thing is no one around me is involved in that lifestyle, I have no way to get them unless I found a random dealer on the street and I don't want the pills bad enough to find a way to get them. I can't justify spending a dollar on them (love money too much!! And I would feel too guilty taking that money from my family's needs) and I have no medical reason to get them. Having easy access was and is my downfall. If I know there is some in the house, it is VERY VERY hard for me to not make excuses anytime I felt any tinge of pain knowing I could make it dissapear and go on with my day happily. That is my weakness. Before I realized I was addicted, I found myself making excuses and finding pains to give myself a reason to take them. From backaches...to toothaches to headaches. Then ultimately it dawned on me I WAS making excuses did my back hurt THAT bad?? Couldn't I just lay down and rest?? Before I ever experienced any withdrawal was when it was truly on. I didn't know the repercussions of what I was doing. I didn't know what goes UP must come DOWN (hard)! I figured, I'll just quit and just stop taking them. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I cope with stress..I've had a rough life and from that I know I can handle most anything that comes my way emotionally. Pills can get anyone of us these days they are given out like candy by doctors. I was niave and stupid, and believed it couldn't happen to me and I learned the hard way it very well can. I know my limits, I know I'm not strong enough to not touch a bottle sitting in a cabinet. I know I make excuses to myself. But I do know I'm strong enough to not go to a dr begging to get them. I plan on avoiding any prescriptions. I learned I can't adderall even to treat my adhd. I could go to a dr right now to get another prescription, but I can't control myself with a bottle of anything in my house. So far I have done pretty well just completely avoiding....a friend of mine had a bunch of bottles of oxycodone, hydrocodone, you name it in her house left over from surgeries from her past. She doesn't like the stuff and I had a kidney infection and was in geniune pain, she offered me a 5mg (she doesn't know my history of course...I couldn't talk to her about stuff like this she would't get it) but as hard as it was to take it I said NO!! I'm fine. Even just that one 5 mg EVEN though I was in pain. I just know myself, I don't even wanna trigger that feeling in my brain ever again. I am traumatized with what happened to me the past two years. I don't like the fact that I don't have control over my own body with that stuff, the mind games, the physical withdrawal when you genuinely just don't want anymore. It can bring the strongest to their knees. This past year I have done a lot of reflecting, I hated myself anytime I took it...I was miserable the whole day. It just wasn't the same as that first year when I was ignorant about withdrawals. I was taking the least I could to stave off withdrawals and tried so many times to just wean, and just stop but I couldn't handle the physical withdrawals. I have lost faith in all doctors. I don't trust them, I ask with any sort of meds...do you have to wean off? Is it addictive? Slightly even? Then I don't want it. Prescription meds are the devil in a superman cape. Suboxone has been a god send for me. I never took over 2 mgs (took 2 by accident taking my husband 8 mg strip without knowing thinking it was .5 mg off the 2mg strip. I don't want it either I just don't want to be in pain from withdrawing from it because I tried cold turkey. I don't like the stuff I hate the taste...don't like the feeling, it gives me headaches and I hate feeling like a zombie. I learned my lesson the hard way....Ignorance is bliss. I am lucky that I didn't fall even deeper into that lifestyle, I just want this nightmare to be over. I'd love to help some people on here and tell them IT CAN happen to you. If you think about a drug, YOU are addicted. Period. It is in your brain and it will take you down if you give it the chance. I'm not taking any chances. I really hope one day I get to the point where I can get injured and leave the bottle full in my cabinet, if I never get to that point I pray that I never have to have a legitimate reason to touch it again. No more excuses, I know better now. I can't handle it period not even if I have a reason. This website helps a lot to really be honest with yourself, and was a huge wakeup call for me. 5 years ago I thought only a junkie could become addicted, that thinking is what got me into this whole. They aren't junkies...they are human beings, just like me. We all have our weaknesses.
Last edited by GettinItOverWith; 03-27-2014 at 02:27 PM.
If you didn't notice so far, I am super sappy partially because of the emotional ups and downs right now...and partially because I am truly passionate about this and I want this so bad. Anyways for any of you reading who are struggling too (I see you peeping in ...heres my weekly inspiration. Hope it can help you too!
"When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
Whe he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."
In response to your earlier post I was probably on roughly .5 when I quit.
Originally Posted by GettinItOverWith
It sounds like you have your head in the right setting. Now to just continue on your path and then one day you will be here on the other side of things.
This to is how I felt for some time now. I hated myself, hated the fact that when I looked in the mirror I couldn't see myself anymore. I couldn't carry on a conversation with my family members, I secluded myself to a personal hell. I was 'maintaining' each and everyday, worried about when family functions came around if I would be feeling well enough. Or what if my stepfathers medical issues worsened?
I learned my lesson the hard way....Ignorance is bliss. I am lucky that I didn't fall even deeper into that lifestyle, I just want this nightmare to be over. I'd love to help some people on here and tell them IT CAN happen to you.
I am traumatized with what happened to me the past two years. I don't like the fact that I don't have control over my own body with that stuff, the mind games, the physical withdrawal when you genuinely just don't want anymore. It can bring the strongest to their knees. This past year I have done a lot of reflecting, I hated myself anytime I took it...I was miserable the whole day. It just wasn't the same as that first year when I was ignorant about withdrawals
They aren't junkies...they are human beings, just like me. We all have our weaknesses.
There was a lot of mental battles going on in my head. 'If I knew then, what I know now'... unfortunately that is not how the world works. I knew I was once strong. I've been in and out of the hospitial and on medication since I was a child w/ chronic gastro issues. So when I got slapped in the face with opiate addiction it was a swift kick to the guts. As I said earlier I maintained for two years and have had a lot of reflecting over the past year and I finally made my move. I am not naive tho and I do know this battle is not over and the power of addiction will forever be burnt into my soul and for this reason I am being vocal with my stepfather who means the world to me and informing him every week of my progress off the subs/opiates. I found by doing this, and thanking God every day and night for getting me through each day I'd like to think I am growing stronger, I know I sure feel stronger!
I hope if at any rate you try to continue with your forum posts as I think it will help you along the way.
heavyconscious, your words are so uplifting and motivating. im considering heavily trying the robert method to get off methadone. i came across this thread and i am so uplifted. gettinitoverwith, im so proud that you have taken the step to become free. i want it so bad i can taste it. i hope to soon be where you are
I am glad my words can be of help friend, this is part of the reason I am here. The other part is because it is of help to me. I too know that we truly hold and have the power to control our lives. My mind is clearer everyday and I am holding conversations with loved ones and friends.
Originally Posted by michaelhadenough
I look forward to reading both of your stories of gaining control of your life again. It felt for so long that it was easier to run from the pain, then it was running to feel well. It is so easy to decide to numb your pain rather than face it. My first two-three weeks, even to this day I know I chose to FACE my pain/addiction and even if I do not feel physically 100% mentally I am very pleased. As I said in my earlier post I know I am not out of the woods and it is something someone will deal with the rest of their lives. I have read and heard it can take over a year for your brain functionality to be close to normal after opiate/sub abuse to this I am not positive. I know I am not expecting change overnight but the fact that I feel stronger and clearer everyday is proof positive to me. I am very thankful to have the parents I do and that I can now be vocal with my stepfather about this. I am also being vocal with a long lost best friend, one who had to fight for his life too. This helps me for so long I had no self worth. Everyday was auto-pilot and routine, no emotion no feeling. Yes I had emotion and feeling but I was so backwards and numb I could not feel it as it was happening. I am enjoying time with my family, my niece and my nephew. I look forward to spennding more time with whole family this year and catch up on lost time.
On a >>>>>> note gonna have to go to the doctor soon thinking I have a sinus infection or maybe ear. Past few nights been >>>>>> with pain in the teeth, didnt get much sleep besides a few hours in the early AM from like 6-845. If it does not go by Monday I will make an apt, have a apt on Tuesday for a cracked feeling.
It feels great even with this mouth pain to have the shackles released!
I wish you the best of luck michael, it is obtainable and you DO have the strength!
this is exactly what i needed. support through someone who has been there. my parents are a godsend also. but they just dont quite get it like someone with experience. im scared to death, but i want it bad. this methadone stuff is no joke. i will check the thread tomorrow to check on gettinitoverwith to see how he is. although short, this conversation helped immensely.
>> like to hear about your story if you have time. success stories are motivators that help those of us on the other side
Originally Posted by HeavyConceious
(She) buts its ok!
Good Morning everyone!
Just wanted to give an update on my day 5 of my wean from .25 mg to .125. Well day 4 was honestly a little rougher then day 1-3 of my drop. I don't believe day 4 should've been as rough as it was for me, don't get me wrong it wasn't even THAT bad at all lol...just some annoying joint pain especially in my knees and ankles and a little anxiety last night. I suspect I did not give myself enough time at .25 mg and I dropped way too fast from 1 mg to .5 to .25 trying to rush it, so the moral is though your excited to do this, don't rush it! Anyways the past is the past I refuse to go back now. I feel like I'm stabilizing soon on this dose. Last night I ended up taking another .125 mg dose at night because I couldn't sleep....so .25 total for yesterday (correct me if I'm wrong, math is not my forte'). My achy knees and ankles while I was trying to sleep and some anxiety creeped up...and 1+1= no go. No need to suffer through this, I want this bad, but as I've read here many of times "better to do it once and do it right". So after debating with myself if I REALLY REALLY Reallllly wanted to take the other .125 dose...I realized I really didn't want to take it . But I gave myself permission, as fast as I want to get this over with..I chose to not suffer and to take the one extra dose to get me over the hump of day 4, to me .25 mg for yesterday was not a loss I've gone 4 days at .125 and I should be fine with the .125 dose today, and I was right I feel fine!
Heavy Conscious, I definitely can relate the past 3 weeks have been far more harder emotionally than physically. I really can't admit to all my friends that I wasn't just "not feeling well" only my husband understands. Friends have been saying I've fallen off the face of the earth this week lol. I just don't want to face people who can't relate when I'm not feeling 100% then I put more effort into pretending I'm fine then actually enjoying being there, it becomes a chore. I don't have the energy to put on a show, Not right now. I've talked to them on the phone though a lot which helps laughing and joking and I have my husband and kids here. Just one more achievement I guess when I get the urge to want to hang out! lol....Waiting for that moment!
Also I'm going to school for nursing, I know a little about a little...lol whats going on with your sinuses/ear/tooth. Ear and tooth pain are really similar. Do you have any fever? Does it ONLY hurt when you lay down or do you feel the same pain level throughout the day? Not everyone gets fever with ear infections but one big sign with an ear infection vs a tooth pain...is that with an ear infection the pain is much worse laying down and (if you will have a fever with it) your fever will spike then. Theres also good chance your sinuses could be acting up from allergies too. Or could be as simple as clenching your teeth in your sleep without knowing, that causes that top jaw/ear pain (stress does that, and this has been a stressful time) If you tell me more I could probably help you pin point it. BUT mostly all of the above are treated with antibiotics, or allergy meds maybe try some benedryl and see if that helps? If not I'd see the dr.
I have seen plenty of you tube videos and read success stories of people coming off....subutex, suboxone, methadone...you name it. All successfully. Just wean wean wean don't rush it listen to your body, and keep your eye on the prize. Now, it Does help to know what your in for by reading forums, but make sure your reading stories of people who weaned right..I've noticed people who drop off at too high of a dose like to get on forums when they're pissed at the world and kill any hope for the rest of them. Its very do able weaning. Slow and steady wins the race. You don't feel like doing cartwheels...your adjusting to "feeling" anything in general..but you are able to do the basics and get through your day without hating life and even laugh some along the way. Being positive helps. If you wake up feeling like >>>>, just know tomorrow you'll feel better. Thats what I keep telling myself. Tomorrow will be easier! No one ever benefits from feeling sorry for themselves and being a victim. I'm no victim....I got myself into this myself so I'll get myself out, simple as that. Did I always feel that way? No. I made a lot of excuses for why poor me needed another pill. Fear from withdrawals was a huge one, but who wouldn't be afraid? Today I realize I could find a million excuses too but I want this. I'm on day 5 at .125 mg suboxone I dropped WAY too quick from 1mg to .5 to .25 within a week 1/2. Don't recommend it so with this last part I am taking my time, I've proven to myself I CAN do this...so now I'm gonna take my time and do it right. The best thing for me I realize NOW has been to feel it out and wait until you feel better between dropping doses. i SHOULD have waited a few more days between each dose, but I guess if I always did everything I SHOULD I wouldn't be in this predicament! I highly recommend preparing yourself ahead of time while your feeling good...start taking vitamins. Buy lots of gatorade. NO need to take off work and sit at home all day, sitting around makes you focus more on how you feel. For those who have jobs working would probably make your day go faster in my opinion. So far I have been able to take care of my kids, clean up, cook dinner, do school work, etc. Not to the best of my ability lol...but I get the jobs done. I just have no motivation to do anything other then what I HAVE to do day to day. That will pass though and I'm looking forward to that milestone!
Some things that have helped me and I started these BEFORE my weaning, Vitamins take time to get into your system!! Prob 2 weeks before would be good: (ALL natural)
Gummy vitamins! So much more pleasant to take when your appetite is gone, reg vitamins make me nauseous going down esp when I'm not feeling to hot.
Gummy Multivitamin-enough said.
B12 gummy vitamins-Help with energy
Gummy Vitamin C-Immune system support (because your immune system needs a boost right now)
L theanine-(not gummy but capsule with no flavor) This vitamin has a calming agent, helps with nervousness/anxiety, it helps a lot.
Immodium- For that Rumbly in Your Tumbly (quoting winnie the pooh also helps lol) (*OH and Idk about anyone else....but higher doses DON'T stop w/d, I felt the same from 2 mg then I did with 16mg. Just had to work harder to do the deed. I don't** recommend this.)
Prenatal Gummy Vitamins- (Men too!) Why? Because they are jam packed with vitamins. There are SO many good vitamins in these it is the SUPER multivitamin. No hormones...so no you will not turn into a she man or anything. Though you might get a new flair for fashion . Jk jk lol...
Energy Chews I found at GNC are really good but forgot the brand sorry. They were by the counter, they taste like candy and work!
My go to through this---this vitamin by "Hyland" called Leg Cramps (they also have something called restless legs!! I haven't tried that one though) So far no restless legs at night and it takes away 85% of my leg aches and 0 restless legs so far. You can take it ever 4-6 hours. Its herbal. It helps a lot. I can't deal with losing sleep and the restless legs. I really believe this is why I don't have it, because I dropped really low really soon.
Drinking a lot of gatorade and water trying to flush my system...and eating. I think a lot of people forget (in the dinosaur days before we ever took anything) just how >>>>ty you feel when you don't eat! Food=energy. So if you feel like death and are exhausted during withdrawal eat and drink water or gatorade. Eat Crackers, toast, noodles whatever your stomach can handle. Also staying hydrated. Dehydration sucks the life from you too. So just eating regularly (which hasn't been a problem my appetite is pretty good most of the time) and drinking a lot has helped too. I have to say I feel good today!! 4th day of this drop was the toughest but does not compare to cold turkey!! By far whew...chills just thinking about that!
This forum has been a life saver. It has been the biggest help for me, having people who relate and don't judge. I think just writing things publicly helps you to be honest with yourself, that there is a problem and you do need help. It helps you be positive, and not beat yourself up over things but at the same time it helps to realize this is SERIOus business. No that 100 mg was not JUST 100 mg "no big deal"...it was 100 freakin MG Of something that could very well kill you one day! So it helps make you realize.....get real!!! No more justifying things to yourself! I have watched my poor mother struggle for years with not only her health but addiction on top of it. Watched her drop to 90 lbs to where she could barely hold her head up she was on so many meds, until I alone pregnant afraid she was going to never wake up one day, drove her to a rehab center. For some people if you don't WAKE UP now and realize what your doing to yourself, you might just go to sleep one night and NEVER WAKE UP. All those people you love that are pissed off at you all the time for doing this to yourself are mad for a reason! They're not just a buzzkill, they aren't just judgemental assholes! They're scared for you, because they love you! I don't know how many nights I spent crying over my mother and praying to god she'd call the next day and be ok. I'd call her every morning to be sure she woke up from the night before and didn't die in her sleep. I would panic if she didn't call me back for a few days. Its a nightmare being a bystander to that lifestyle watching your loved ones go through that. I was SO angry at her, I would just >>>>> and yell and be disgusted with her. BUT deep down inside I was scared >>>>less and fear=anger 10 fold. So if any of you out there addicted are reading this right now, and your isolating yourself from all the naggers and "negative" people who don't want you to use. THEY LOVE YOU! THEY CRY FOR YOU, and You are bringing them down with you. Your not just hurting yourself, your abandoning people who need you, your hurting people who love you. You are a nuclear bomb, your not only exploding but your disease is radiating out killing the people who love you. Do it for them.....if not just for yourself. You can do this. Deep down inside...TRUST ME I KNOW that feeling. I know better and I am angry with myself for falling into the trap myself...I don't want to put my kids through that! I refuse!!! I don't want to be that Mom. They need me. I have a friend whose mother died from overdose. It could happen to any of us..... Just had to get that out....don't be dillusional people. Don't hide from reality anymore and stand up and be who your loved ones need you to be because they need you more then you could imagine right now. When you come out of the fog you will see that, all it takes is one step forward and you are stronger then you know.
This site helps you to really come to terms with reality I guess, and stop making excuses. I really believe if you want something bad enough you will make it happen. I'm doing it and you can too....we all can. If your wean takes longer for you to be successful, so be it! IT IS WORTH IT, and you will be better for it. It might not happen next week but it WILL happen and thats the important thing. Just knowing this is motivating others is motivation in itself! Now I gotta make this happen! MAN :::NO pressurrrrrrrrre:: haha... Thanks though for chiming it. It truly does help! Your helping me as much as I'm helping you, and don't worry you'll get there. You can make those wishes happen.
Anyways!!!! For the record so far day 5 I feel 90% normal!!!!!! Almost GREAT!!!! ("almost" because I don't want to jynx myself bragging and get kicked in the ass later) I don't want to skip a day during the weekend because my husband and kids are home, plus I have an exam in the morning. I figured if I do this on my time, I will be more likely to stick with it and that will give me two more days to stabilize on this dose. So 1st skip day is scheduled for Monday! So far feeling really positive and so excited I'm actually pulling this off! God I want this for my myself and especially for my kids!!! Those of you reading, trying to check and see if you'll die coming off suboxone YOU WON'T it is NOT bad I promise! Don't let the fear of the unknown hold you back, this it NOT the W/D's your familiar with! You never know until you try (by weaning the right way!) Roberts taper plan tried and true method-it works! I'm doing and I have been smiling/laughing/crying/excited/you name the emotion... along the way it is emotional. It doesn't matter because its the real me talking! Make a profile, get on here and lets do this! Let people help you...you won't regret it, I know I don't. Michael let us know your plan putting it in writing it helps....even if its preparing to start next week or the next, even if you plan on buying some gatorade tomorrow lol... and plan to only dropping by 15% per dose instead of 25% and let people HELP you make a plan even. There are good caring people in this world. If you need help coming up with a plan just ask. Think of it this way, your story will help someone else out there feeling hopeless, and "stuck" on methadone see it CAN happen, and you could change someone elses life. I'm happy to meet you and so so happy my story is helping. Readers I am weaning off suboxone and having minor minor withdrawals, and I'm HAPPY today! Who would've thought! Goes against everything the nightmares you have read tell you shouldn't be happening. I should be laying in my bed right now dying in pain right? Actually right about now I'm gonna go put on some music deep clean my house and enjoy the weekend with my family cause I'm feeling awesome and I'm taking advantage of it!
Almost forgot***** For my list of must have vitamins- Potassium!!! I've been taking 500 mg for over a week now and thats supposed to also help tremendously with RLS. Had to post that incase anyone needs to know. Have a good weekend!
Last post for that day...some amazing quotes that made me smile
"Life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you respond to it."
"He (or she!!) that has begun, Has half done. Dare to be wise; BEGIN"
" Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved. - Helen Keller"
"Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never–in nothing, great or small, large or petty–never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense. - Winston Churchill"
"Life is a series of problems. Do we want to moan about them or solve them? - M. Scott Peck"
"The darker the night, the nearer the Dawn"
Ok..now really have a good weekend!
glad you are feeling well and i am very thankful for your kind words
Just wanted to update again today. Today I planned on trying to skip a day but I chickened out....I'm a little dissapointed in myself but the pain in my joints is a little much today. I don't think I'm physically ready quite yet. I'm hoping part of it is re-learning my limits. I got accustomed for a long time...to being "indestructible" and to be able to go go go morning to night and once I started feeling a little better then last week, I think I just over did it the past few days. I was running around all day since 7:30 this morning and by 5:00 I felt like an elderly old lady who could hardly walk with achy joints, and just wanted a nap. I'm not mentally nor physically ready for a skip day, not today anyway. I'm no where near as weak as the first couple days of my drop but I think I pushed my limits physically a little too far too soon. SO tempted to take ONE MORE peice for my hip/knee/ankle pain, but I took an aleve instead, so tempting though....I won't lie. I think I really need to plan this out for a day I can spare taking it easy most of the day. The joint pain that I thought was gone finally crept back up on me when I physically did too much I believe. It really sucks though. I thought I was past that. That is really the only thing holding me back is this joint pain...I'm fine sitting down but being a mother of 3 I can't just sit around all day. Does anyone know when I can expect this joint pain to be over with?? It's a pain in the ass.
My motivation for this week: This song John Doe I heard lately...
" Everybody's addicted to something
Everybody's got to grip onto something
Even if it's just to feel the response of appeal
Maybe once, maybe twice
Maybe hundreds of times, hundreds of times
Without it, it's just hard to function at times
You race to the bottom of every single bottle
As if there was someone or something to find
You're struggling in your mind
And you tell yourself lie after lie"
I just want the John I know"
I can imagine that skipping days and then taking the plunge (aka jump) is a bit overwhelming. Are you stable at .125 mg? If so, your jump will likely be smooth, with the exception of some mild symptoms. The goal is not to get complacent. If your body is physically ready, then take your first skip day. I bet you'll find it's easier than you think. I've heard many people say that once they start skipping days they feel empowered because they realize they "can do it".
Go for it!
As far as joint pain, it's so hard to say how long that will last. Everyone differs there. So OTC remedies aren't helping? What about Epsom salt baths?
Yes, you will stabilize soon. It's totally understandable to be nervous about skipping days, especially when you're having physical symptoms like joint pain. It sounds like you've tried most of the remedies, but maybe someone else will chime in with a suggestion.
You can do this! You're so close now -- take comfort in that. I wish I were that close. I'm still at 1 mg. Had it not been for my back surgery and a short-lived relapse, I would have been done with my taper a couple months ago. Very frustrating.
Anyway, do what you can to find relief and hopefully the joint pain will pass soon. Stay strong!
getting you are very close now to the skipping days and at such a low dose now that an awful lot of this now becomes mental. I posted this to you earlier and just thought I would post it again. When you get to your first skip day if you start getting uncomfortable before the 48 hr mark just hold on and if you don't make it to 48 hrs it will be no big deal. if for instance you would get to 36 hrs and feel you need to just dose and then try to go more then 36 hrs befor you dose again. As long as you are dosing further apart time wise between doses you are making progress and getting closer to jumping. You are almost to the finish line now and my best wishes to you.
I'm reading your posts with a vengeance. I'm a mom too.. Just started my first dose of Subs yesterday. I could use a friend like you. Stay strong!!
I have been trying to do this for months, I relapsed a few times myself. Its not how many times you get knocked down its how many times we get back up that matters. I have no chronic pain issues but the withdrawing process makes everything feel much worse so I could only imagine dealing with chronic pain on top of this. You will get there at your own pace doing what works with your own life. If when you go down in your dose you have to lay around for 3 days til you feel better you WILL feel better sooner or later. Or if you have to go down half that dose and then go back up one day then go back down a day. My life can be pretty hectic so I literally had to schedule when to feel like >>>> (which the hard part is planning it and going through with it.) I stayed busy yesterday because I know even though my body wants to rest....if I lay around Im just torturing myself all day thinking how >>>>>> I felt. Staying out the house getting some fresh air and being away from taking the easy way out (taking one more dose) I HAD to push through. That seems to be the trick. Force yourself to go anywhere. To a library and read a new book. Go watch a movie, Go sit and eat lunch with a friend. Get out and get busy. The mornings sucked the worse. Dragging myself to shower and get out the house but once the sunshine hits your face and you turn the radio up you feel so much better. I went tanning and spent all day outside enjoying the day. Pamper yourself make yourself feel better in other ways. When I was too busy laughing with friends or playing with my kids the last thing I was thinking about was my ankle hurting. Mind over matter. If you sit there focused on feeling like >>>> your gonna feel like >>>>. So try scheduling a busy week. Then drop your dose then? Laying around all day compared to being out for myself laying around was like torture. Or rent some good funny movies. This l theanine, tylenol and ibuprofen, and b12 and taurine (taurine lowers high blood pressure naturally) it has helped a lot. Anyways you know yourself. Do what works for you. How did you get to 1 mg? What did you do to get yourself down that low? How much were you on before?