I POSTED THIS IN NEED TO TALK, BUT I THINK IT BELONGS HERE - THOUGH I AM USING BUPRENORPHINE

LETTER TO ROBERT 325

I will try to be brief.

I broke my foot and was put on 5/325 Oxycodone. The hospital just gave 5/325 oxycodone for about 6 months. I developed a tolerance and used 3 hospitals and was at about 100mg per day for over 6 months.

The day the cast was off my foot I got on my bike and a car hit me. It tore my rotary cuff and I needed massive surgery. My Chinese employer lied about having insurance so I found a US trained Chinese doctor to scope my rotary cuff. All must be paid in cash up so I worked 3 jobs and 60 hours a week and relied heavily on the Oxycodone to keep up the schedule.

I saved up the money and the surgery was a success. I am recovered and am in the gym doing physical rehab and no longer have pain. I knew I was addicted so I went to my pain doctor for help. He denied he did anything wrong, cut me off cold turkey and blacklisted my name at hospitals. I found it impossible to get medicine. I decided to taper using online pills. Tapering has proven impossible because online quality is inaccurate so I number of pills I take is not relevant.

The counterfeits are immaculate. They have a 512 and nice score line so I can split the pill in half. But the second I got the online pills I found myself very angry all the time. I could not sleep and it was clear the amount of oxycodone was significantly lower, but I cannot say how much lower. I immediately turned to cold water extraction because I did not know what was in the pills. It has taken 50 pills to get through a day and now it is clear that things are out of control.

I looked for alternatives. I found Suboxone clinics in Beijing, but addiction in China is a crime. All clinics are in-patient. They last 2 weeks. I have been to the 4 of them. They all involve sharing a gated prison cell and intense propaganda training. I don’t speak Chinese so I would not understand the training, but it is clear that rehab is a form of punishment.

Ironically I am a human rights lawyer and here teaching US law, Constitutional Law and basically work as a legal missionary. My salary is about $1500 a month. I work for one of the top 3 law schools in China. I would be banished if I revealed y problem.

So I am on my own. It all depends on how reliable and much faith I can put in the following schedule.

Robert 325 Schedule
I am using sixteen .5mg Buprenorphine to replace an eight mg Suboxone

Day 1 .... Day 4 8mg
Day 5 .... Day 6 6mg
Day 7 .... Day 9 4mg
Day 10 .. Day 12 2mg
Day 13 .. take the smallest piece you can break off
skip day 14
Day 15 ... take another sliver
skip two days
take another sliver
skip three days and quit

I have two months paid vacation. I have the time to do this but I cannot afford to get addicted to the Bupe. It is too expensive. I could literally do the oxycodone indefinitely but it is dirty and beginning to take a mental toll. Each box is different in quality and I feel I am slipping into madness.

In addition to the schedule above I have 6 pills. They are .5mg each. I also have 50 .5mg bupes on the way. They should arrive in 2 days. At that point I feel I can face the devil and try to detox alone.

I am scared Robert and all out there reading. I am banking my life on this schedule. If it fails and I end up addicted to the Bupe I barely have enough Bupe to pack my bags and make it home to get into a US hospital…assuming I can get into one.

I feel on the verge of a nervous breakdown each time I think about this. Again, I cannot just jump on a plane and fly home because I can’t stick 500 oxy in my suitcase and hope to make it. I am a prisoner in every sense of the word.

QUESTION: IS THIS REALLY RELIABLE – ASSUMING I SHOW DO MY PART WILL THIS PROGRAM (GIVE OR TAKE A MG HERE/THERE) ACTUALLY WORK? I know relapse and all that is up to me, but is there a chance I end up in the middle of some nightmarish WD situation if I to the steps 1) Total WD; 2) This 14 day plan (with knowledge it isn’t chiseled in granite) and 3) Don’t relapse. At the end of 14 days is there a chance I will be in the middle of WD from BOTH or EITHER of the Oxycodone or Buprenorphine. I don’t expect flowers growing out my butt, but I won’t have an emergency room – so I have no safety net.

I am also confused by the suboxone/buprenorphine distinction. I am counting on 16 (sixteen) .5mg buprenorphine to be equal to one 8mg Suboxone. Is this appropriate?

Many “best practices” articles I have read agree with Robert and say that anything beyond 2 weeks should be done only in exceptional circurmstances. I also read a very interesting article saying that the use of Suboxone is unethically expensive and that the SUBOXONE is nothing more than .5mg buprenorphine with 4mg Naloxone.( http://blogs.psychcentral.com/epidem...zed-ignorance/).

Thank you for your time – this forum has been a God-Send and Robert in general has been my primary guide.