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Want to support my significant other
  1. #1
    NonUserKy is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
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    1

    Default Want to support my significant other

    Hello,

    I am the sort of guy who just wouldn't consider hard drugs, ever. And I hate prescription drugs and get off them as quickly as possible when I need them. I have met a wonderful lady and we are falling in love. But she has been extremely secretive about her past. She finally admitted that she is going to a methadone clinic here in Lexington, KY. I know that means she has a drug addiction and I have had people tell me a lot of things about why you need to go to a clinic like that. And I think half of it is BS. But I am just not "aware" of that lifestyle and know next to nothing about it.

    I don't feel that I can provide the support that she needs if I am this naive about it. So I need to learn. I want to keep up the right amount of pressure and support on her to 1) tell me the entire truth about what led her to this point, 2) don't do it again, 3) confide in me how it affects her now and 4) turn her life completely around when it comes to drugs. Then we are going to get married.

    She says she did a few hard drugs when she was young but her current problem stems from prescription drugs. She identified some street names which I had no idea what they were and can't remember what she said.

    Obviously I need to get her to open up with me about her past and how it led to where she is today. But I want to know more about her situation now. She said her doses are now half what she was taking. I believe she said she is at 50 or 60 a day now, whatever that means. I want her off this stuff, and anything else she might take, immediately. But I know that's not realistic. If I can get her off this stuff I'll do whatever it takes to get her through withdrawal and whatever else she needs.

    Someone please help me understand this. I'd be happy to do more research and reading about it. Actual experiences would help. I just want to know more about her problem.

  2. #2
    iloerose is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
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    3,508

    Default

    I suggest you go to the need to talk board and the suboxone board and start reading threads. Being an addict in our society is shaming. It's like something we could control and we can't, an addict's brain chemistry actually changes with that first pleasurable feeling and makes us want more and more. Look at Artist658's posts (think I have the right name). Most people feel that it's the addict's fault for not having the will power, and where it is true that we do control our own actions and make our own choices, an addict sometimes has to learn this. I mean actually learn how to say no and to take responsibility for our own disease and recovery, how to realize that drugs/drinking/ what ever will actually negatively effect our lives to the point of ruin. What an addict needs is support, just like a cancer victim needs support. Yeah you're right, she does need to get off the methadone. Can she do it immediately: NO. There are various ways to do that, again read the boards. Does she go to NA, CR, whatever? That might be a good step. Go with her. Or let her go alone. Perhaps she would like to have the anonymity of support here? Does she want support and help? That is an extremely important question and can be a struggle to answer. However, you need to know that she is an addict, period. That lasts forever. It does not go away.You may be in "remission" so to speak but there is always going to be an oxy, vicodin, whatever, somewhere. Most important: is she prepared to be clean? Read some threads.

    Peace,

    Iloerose

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