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Need advice - addict sibling
  1. #1
    sad_bro is offline New Member
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    Default Need advice - addict sibling

    Hello-

    New member here looking for advice and answers.

    I have twin sisters – one of which is a hospice type nurse and the other a pill addict. The pill addict is on opiates (Vic’s), adderall and xanax – all of which were legally prescribed up until a few weeks ago. She has been under the care of a new physician who stopped prescribing everything except for Prozac.

    I suspect she has been abusing the pills for the past year or so with no one willing to except the fact that she was an addict up until a month ago when she was driving wasted with her son in the car. My parents (in their 60’s) have tried to address this themselves by monitoring her pill intake, keeping her isolated (she lives in an apartment off their house) and dozens of blow outs where she has physically assaulted my father. It was truly ugly. Throughout the ordeal she denies having a problem or that anything is wrong. She ranges from being passively pleasant to verbally abusive and straight out lying in mere seconds.

    They thought they were making some headway as she appeared to be back to a normal state for a few weeks until her fiancée walked in on her snorting adderall. This led to a huge blow up culminating with the state police showing up to arrest her for stealing methodone from my other sisters hospice patient. My nurse sister has a hospice patient that she visits several times a week. My drug addict sister was showing up at different times stealing pills. Once the hospice patient knew pills were missing – my nurse sister set up her patient to be able to bust whoever was stealing the pills – which unbeknownst to her was her addict sister. Confused yet? This stuff reads like a Dan Brown novel.

    In short, the hospice patient wont press charges because they are saddened by the whole situation. The above blow up lasted for 2 days. Finally when she agreed to go into rehab – her tox screen came back clean because it had been a few days since she had a pill so her insurance wont pay for her visit in rehab.

    Bottom line – she does not think she has a problem. She cant go to rehab and any time my nurse sister has had her committed for a 24 hr observation to a the mental hospital – they release her a day later saying nothing is wrong. No place – no drug rehab facility – no mental institution – no where will take her.

    My parents continue to let her live at her apartment solely for the sake of her 2 kids but after the rehab facility threw her out – we are out of ideas.

    Help!

  2. #2
    newyorkgal is offline Platinum Member
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    Bro, it's a sad story but oh so very common. As an addict and a relative of an addict, I can tell you the family is always sucked into the drama. The one thing you state in your post which is a negative is that she does not think she has a problem. Therefore, I'm sure she doesn't think she needs help. Unfortunately, those around an addict can't do very much until and unless that person believes there is a problem and wants the help. I know this as I was an addict and my family did and tried everything in their power to help me to no avail really. I went through rehabs and therapy and my mom doled out methadone to me. I hurt them deeply but as an addict, it was secondary to what I wanted to do. Addicts are selfish to the core. Addicts lie all the time. Hopefully, she will come to the realization that she needs help and then you can give her all the support in the world but until then, there is not very much you can do. Addiction is like no other disease where you take you medicine or other treatment and get better. It's on your sister's shoulders and I really hope she gets her mind straight soon.

  3. #3
    sad_bro is offline New Member
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    Yes - the critical piece of information is that she honestly does not think there's an issue and that she isnt addicted to pills.

    She would crush up the Vic's and Xanax in her kids baby bottle liners and snort them. She stole her sisters ATM card and stole $250. But if you ask her about those things she will tell you with a straight face that she didnt do it. To the point where it appears she honestly believes herself.

    I know we are basically screwed until she admits she has a problem but thought I would share my story with the folks on this board. I understand my story isnt special or unique - its unfortunately all too common. Along with the drugs she appears to also have some eating disorder (related or not to the drugs). I fear the combination of the eating disorder and drugs will tank her heart.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
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    Quote Originally Posted by sad_bro View Post
    Yes - the critical piece of information is that she honestly does not think there's an issue and that she isnt addicted to pills.

    She would crush up the Vic's and Xanax in her kids baby bottle liners and snort them. She stole her sisters ATM card and stole $250. But if you ask her about those things she will tell you with a straight face that she didnt do it. To the point where it appears she honestly believes herself.

    I know we are basically screwed until she admits she has a problem but thought I would share my story with the folks on this board. I understand my story isnt special or unique - its unfortunately all too common. Along with the drugs she appears to also have some eating disorder (related or not to the drugs). I fear the combination of the eating disorder and drugs will tank her heart.
    Sad-

    Hi...I just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Katie...I'm 26, and I am a recovering addict. Opiates were my drug of choice, but for the last eleven years...I'd do anything offered.

    I have also suffered an eating disorder for the same amount of time....I guess for some of us, it just goes hand-in-hand.

    I hit my rock bottom, when I was kidnapped. By a drug dealer...who's every minute of existence...he was doing lines. He made me do them too, so I was always tweaked out and scared.

    He beat me...every single day. I would get punched in the face for eight hours straight, then mutilated with hunting knives...then have a metal baseball bat smashed into my legs for a few hours...and it would end with a beating with a hammer on my back. Then the sun would rise.,.,.and as soon as it sank, this scenario repeated itself.

    He raped me a handful of times too...and during the day I was hiss slave...cooking, cleaning...all while shoving TONS of pills down my throat so I wasn't screaming in pain.

    This went on for MONTHS.

    Long story short, I got away.

    What I'm trying to say is...sometimes it takes hitting rock bottom, but man...if there is ANY way you can chip away her tough exterior...and actually talk to her, where she's listening,..tell her what happened to me...tell her it doesn't have to end in tragedy. My face will never be the same...I lost permanent use of my right ring finger...and have chronic pain for the rest of my life. I almost had to get my legs amputated!

    When it comes to addiction...sometimes rock bottom HAS to be hit...

    Hold her, SHOW her you love her...make her believe it, even though it might be the toughest thing you do.

    Tell her what happened to me...it does NOT have to be like that...but only SHE can prevent it.

    Addiction is a sick sick ugly disease and will manipulate everything. I have been free from my kidnapper for almost a year now...and am just starting to grasp the reality of why I ended up in his hands.

    I am almost in tears right now...because I wish there was something more I could do...I wish I could tell your sister...everything.

    I will be praying for her...every day and every night...that I can promise you.

    I will pray for you too...

    I don't mean to be a bummer, but I'm praying that maybe someone will listen to what happened to me...and prevent it from happening to them! I never thought anything like that would happen to me...but it did. It happens ALL THE TIME.

    Keeping you in my thoughts.

    Katie
    Denny_D and luvy298 like this.

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