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Why the change?
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    97

    Default Why the change?

    This just drives me crazy. Please help. I broke my back T-11 burst fracture in 2003 and was taking 10-12 regular vicodins a day. It just made me SLEEP..that's it...NO HIGH..NO ENERGY. I even thru it away and had refills never filled when I got better. Just itch and sleep. That's all it did for me.
    A couple of years ago I had two intestinal surguries...since then I react differently...I get energy..I am dependent and have been thru hell. Why does my brain process this differently now? After the kids and all thru my life I never got any high from pain killers...I could never understand why or how people got addicted to pain killers. Is it because I have lost weight...got older...what happened?

  2. #2
    Robert_325 is offline Retired
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    16,689

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by IllMissMyNorcos View Post
    This just drives me crazy. Please help. I broke my back T-11 burst fracture in 2003 and was taking 10-12 regular vicodins a day. It just made me SLEEP..that's it...NO HIGH..NO ENERGY. I even thru it away and had refills never filled when I got better. Just itch and sleep. That's all it did for me.
    A couple of years ago I had two intestinal surguries...since then I react differently...I get energy..I am dependent and have been thru hell. Why does my brain process this differently now? After the kids and all thru my life I never got any high from pain killers...I could never understand why or how people got addicted to pain killers. Is it because I have lost weight...got older...what happened?

    Saw that you had posted again and was hoping it was a message that you had stopped using. It's impossible to say exactly why you are reacting differently to the opiates today than you were in years past. It could be due to any one or none of the possible reasons you mentioned. Our body chemistries change and the way we react to things changes accordingly. One thing is for sure ... if you made the decision to stop using you would no longer be riding this rollercoaster and things would straighten out for you in no time at all. Soon you would be sharing with others how to get clean for good. Good luck and God bless.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    97

    Default Robert

    Hey...thanks so much. I've stopped but only because I can't get a refill until the end of the month. It seems like I go thru a week of withdrawal..then two weeks or so of the horrible cravings...like you'll do and say things you'd never usually do for them...right...you know the drill. Then it's time for more. I am sick of this. Counting the days. Dragging my kids to the pharmacy. Never feeling like I can feed this monster inside enough. As long as this doctor will give them to me I know I won't be able to stop. I went the subutex route. I just have this poor man wrapped around my finger. I've told him so many times that I am totally hooked...but I can always manipulate back for more. I feel like I am "lucky" to have access to my precious drug...isn't that sick? I've been off all week and have a ways to go. I wish I just had the strength to never call him again.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    97

    Default

    Robert-Thanks. I have tried to stop. I've been "dependent" for only a couple of years and I'll never forget two crossroads. The first was when I told my doctor that the vicodin was only lasting about four hours for pain relief..so he said he was going to call in something else for me and when I picked it up it said 10-325 and I knew that meant double the "good" stuff. The second was when I always for at least a year took ONE reg. vicodin a night before work..I looked forward all day to taking it. The crossroads came when I said, why waist this great feeling on people at work?" I want to feel great around my family....that's when I started taking them all day. My close friend just told me it took her about 6 months to a year to get over the mental part of her drug use.
    Thanks for being here Robert. I've been reading for a long time and just recently started posting.

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