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Tramadol Taper...again. (I should change my user name to freedom2012)
  1. #1
    freedom2011 is offline New Member
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    Default Tramadol Taper...again. (I should change my user name to freedom2012)

    Hello fellow warriors,

    I am ashamed to say I slipped up and found myself back on Tramadol again. I am beginning my tapering schedule today. It worked well last time and I wouldn't try it any other way. I have been taking 4/day since I fell off the wagon and today I begin my taper by taking only 3/day. 5-7 days of this and I will switch to 2/day, etc., until I am down to 1/2 per day then I'm jumping off. I'm scared, anxious and depressed when I start to think about going through with this but then I manage to salvage some strength and willpower and realize that this will pass and I will be a better person for it. I'm doing it for myself, first and foremost. I'm also doing this for all the people I have in my life that I care about. I'm astonished whenever I sit and think about how I got myself back in to this position. It all started by just taking one again after almost 6 months of sobriety. I told myself I was clean and wouldn't be forced to take more if I only just took one. Someone I know had a prescription and they offered me one (not knowing of my addiction) and so I said "yes" and that was that. I enjoyed that one tablet I took so I went back to the person I used to get them from and stocked up and have been taking them since. What a fool I was to take that one again. I had been so strong for half a year.

    Anyway, like I said, it's been 4/day. That's been enough to keep me happy and give me that horrible false sense of well being that these nasty tablets appear to offer you. I may consult my doctor about taking an anti-depressant once I get clear of the tram as I unfortunately do suffer from that and the Tramadol certainly helps with that but I'm sick of being a prisoner to these tablets. That's what really bugs me, that and the fact that I know they can't be good for me even if they do alleviate the depression I feel. As I knew the last time I quit, you have to take the good with the bad. Not every moment is perfect and everyone has to deal with this. It's called life. But I know the good things are there too and I want to experience them yet again with out needing a drug to help me do it. I was on Welbutrin years ago, during a time in my life when I wasn't addicted to Tramadol and they seemed to help, though they sort of neutralize your feelings in a way to where you don't feel any drastic highs or lows. I will try to see how I feel after I get clean and hopefully I won't feel the need to take the Welbutrin again. Even though it's not an opiate type drug it's still something you have to take everyday to feel "normal" and I don't want to feel that dependence anymore.

    The folks on here are very supportive and it's good to know I can talk to people who can relate to what I'm feeling. Thanks for listening and feel free to chime in. I could use all the support you are willing to offer.
    Crystalclear651 likes this.

  2. #2
    thalia45 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by freedom2011 View Post
    Hello fellow warriors,

    I am ashamed to say I slipped up and found myself back on Tramadol again. I am beginning my tapering schedule today. It worked well last time and I wouldn't try it any other way. I have been taking 4/day since I fell off the wagon and today I begin my taper by taking only 3/day. 5-7 days of this and I will switch to 2/day, etc., until I am down to 1/2 per day then I'm jumping off. I'm scared, anxious and depressed when I start to think about going through with this but then I manage to salvage some strength and willpower and realize that this will pass and I will be a better person for it. I'm doing it for myself, first and foremost. I'm also doing this for all the people I have in my life that I care about. I'm astonished whenever I sit and think about how I got myself back in to this position. It all started by just taking one again after almost 6 months of sobriety. I told myself I was clean and wouldn't be forced to take more if I only just took one. Someone I know had a prescription and they offered me one (not knowing of my addiction) and so I said "yes" and that was that. I enjoyed that one tablet I took so I went back to the person I used to get them from and stocked up and have been taking them since. What a fool I was to take that one again. I had been so strong for half a year.

    Anyway, like I said, it's been 4/day. That's been enough to keep me happy and give me that horrible false sense of well being that these nasty tablets appear to offer you. I may consult my doctor about taking an anti-depressant once I get clear of the tram as I unfortunately do suffer from that and the Tramadol certainly helps with that but I'm sick of being a prisoner to these tablets. That's what really bugs me, that and the fact that I know they can't be good for me even if they do alleviate the depression I feel. As I knew the last time I quit, you have to take the good with the bad. Not every moment is perfect and everyone has to deal with this. It's called life. But I know the good things are there too and I want to experience them yet again with out needing a drug to help me do it. I was on Welbutrin years ago, during a time in my life when I wasn't addicted to Tramadol and they seemed to help, though they sort of neutralize your feelings in a way to where you don't feel any drastic highs or lows. I will try to see how I feel after I get clean and hopefully I won't feel the need to take the Welbutrin again. Even though it's not an opiate type drug it's still something you have to take everyday to feel "normal" and I don't want to feel that dependence anymore.

    The folks on here are very supportive and it's good to know I can talk to people who can relate to what I'm feeling. Thanks for listening and feel free to chime in. I could use all the support you are willing to offer.
    Thankfully Freedom, some years back I tried Tramadol for a few days; didn't do a thing for me (remove the pain, or sad to say, make me "happier"). Thank God!!! Anyway I haven't used that stuff in a few years, and then, only for a short, interrupted period of time. I will say that if it had "enhanced" my mood by one iota... well we all know where that goes, so I take absolutely! no credit for tossing it.

  3. #3
    Restlessly is online now Member
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    FREEDOM.....You CAN do this...you're way stronger than you realize. With the care and concern and support on this forum you'll be clean in no time. No more "days1-3".

    Post here often, take the advice offered and keep a positive attitude. Know in your heart that YOU CAN DO THIS...dont let anything deter you.

    Stand Strong

  4. #4
    freedom2011 is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Restlessly View Post
    FREEDOM.....You CAN do this...you're way stronger than you realize. With the care and concern and support on this forum you'll be clean in no time. No more "days1-3".

    Post here often, take the advice offered and keep a positive attitude. Know in your heart that YOU CAN DO THIS...dont let anything deter you.


    Stand Strong
    Thank you Restlessly. I am determined, and that feels like half the battle. I wish success for everyone else on here that wants free from addiction as well. I have faith that we can all do it. If you can imagine it, it can be done. Stay strong everyone, and be determined. It is a scary place to be in when you are in between addiction and sobriety but the effort we must exert to make it through is all worth it.

    freedom2011

  5. #5
    thalia45 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by freedom2011 View Post
    Thank you Restlessly. I am determined, and that feels like half the battle. I wish success for everyone else on here that wants free from addiction as well. I have faith that we can all do it. If you can imagine it, it can be done. Stay strong everyone, and be determined. It is a scary place to be in when you are in between addiction and sobriety but the effort we must exert to make it through is all worth it.

    freedom2011
    Tramadol/Ultram is really not worth it! It sucks you in and delivers nothing! I am not at all regretful that I got nothing from it, because I am quite certain that had it had ANYTHING to offer I would have been there. Strange gifts from unexpected places.

    Thalia

  6. #6
    freedom2011 is offline New Member
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    Many thanks for the kind words of support. It's amazing what a few supportive words can do for someone that feels the way I do. Day 2 now and I went more than half the day before taking my first tablet. I am so ready to be done with this and feel better. It's funny that once you get it in your head that you are going to quit that the drugs don't even really make you feel like they used to. You have so much anxiety and fear about what may happen when you try to quit that those feelings of calm and euphoria the drug used to give you doesn't work anymore. I know I could tell myself right now "Let's wait 6 more months or a year before thinking of quitting" and I would likely feel better almost instantaneously. But that will not be my fate. Not this time. I've got too much to live for. I am so excited to be able to go on a trip somewhere and not feel the weight of knowing that I have to have those tablets with me in a plastic bottle, or a few in my pants pocket. I can breeze through airport security/customs without having to worry "Will they find them and question me?". That is always very stressful.

    Many warm wishes to all those people out there suffering. I wish you luck with your fight too.

    freedom2011
    ClassiqueMom likes this.

  7. #7
    Halloweenhead is offline Member
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    One thing I have learned is that relapse is a part of recovery. The guilt and shame that can come with it can eventually makes us want to change. I'm not throwing stones here - only talking from personal experience. You sound determined to continue your taper. Things are probably real tough now but they will get better. If you continue to taper, your body will heal..it just takes some time. Three or four weeks from now (if you stick with it) you will look back and know this. This is a much shorter time than it probably seems to you right now. Keep posting...the biggest part of this is the mental and emotional and you need to get it out. Best wishes for success!
    Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I'm just an addict who knows a little about drugs.

  8. #8
    Crystalclear651 is offline Senior Member
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    Kudos to u for taking things upon urself to change n getting started on ur taper. This forum is a great place for guidance n support, I've never felt this kind of unity n kindness from complete strangers, whom I now think as friends and confidants. Keep up the good work n it seems like uv got a great attitude to beat this. You'll b surprised how good you'll feel as ur body repairs itself. Keep posting, n have a great weekend!!!

  9. #9
    freedom2011 is offline New Member
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    Still continuing with my taper. I am taking 2/day now. I go as long as I can each day before I take the first one (usually 1 pm) and then I take another late in the evening before I go to bed. I can honestly say I already feel my head clearing somewhat and I am looking forward to being completely free of the tramadol. A few more days of this and I will try to move to 1/2 in the afternoon and then 1/2 before bed and see how that works. I don't want to get ahead of myself here but so far the tapering has not been too bad. I can feel myself withdrawling, it's a frustrating feeling but not agonizing like I know it would have been for me if I had just gone cold turkey. You people are all so kind and I feel like even though you don't know me you truly care abbout my well being. That's my update, thanks for the support.

  10. #10
    ClassiqueMom is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by freedom2011 View Post
    ....you truly care abbout my well being. That's my update, thanks for the support.
    we sure do!.. thanx for the update!
    be good to yourself.. and keep keeping us posted!

    allll my best! and prayers! too!
    Classique MoM

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