[kathleen5hockey]

Well written. It is so true.

[TwilightL]

I wonder if anyone feels as depressed as me today.

[kathleen5hockey]

We all get depressed. I have given myself permission to cry, just not too much. I have had a few breakdowns but it is just so much better to smile. Even if you don't feel like it.

[Lost83]

I know how those days are, go get a pedicure, do something for yourself. Take a hot shower, cry it out and dust yourself off. Sorry you're having a bad day...

[NikNak1]

Hi Twilight. I read this thread and could not help but think that you need to do exactly what you are asking him to do, and that is to give up something that is so obviously bad for your health. leading by example is always the best way and might just give him the kick up the butt he needs. Hope you don't take this the wrong way. I really hope it works out for you. Be strong. x

[TwilightL]

Hello everyone.

I just wanted to give an update. For all the other people going threw this seeking an answer. I left my boyfriend. It wasn't easy. And still I miss him.

I just simply refused to take his calls. I can't tell you how out of control he was. And of some of the stories I heard. But it was bad.

And maybe this was the rock bottom he needed. Because 9 days ago he decided to get clean. I know 9 days isn't much. But I have to give him credit.

I did talk to him last night. And he sounded completely different. Even reminded me of the man I once knew.

But I can't help feel at any moment it will crumble. So with that I apologized for taking his call. It isn't fair to either of us. There is too much mistrust.

It kind of sucks in a way because we work great together. And in a way I'm jealous of all the friends he will have and the wife he may take in the future. Because I know no matter what. We can never be friends. Because we were too good of lovers.

[purpledog]

dont forget about the beautiful future that could be around the corner for you pal. it might have been the fork in the road you need to take, to meet the real guy of your dreams. who you wouldnt have found, while stilll attached to the addict.
some kiwi gal saying hi anyway. down here in new zealand. hope you are feeling a bit better.
purpledog

[betterdaysx]

please don't take what i say personally, but you need to leave. show him you're not kidding around. i was addicted to oxys and percs for almost two years now. i just recently became clean after the worst withdrawl ever, and with the help of sobos. your boyfriend does'nt see you as his girilfriend anymore, he sees you more as someone to manipulate. i've had someone who is crazy in love with me through this whole time, and without thinking i would do whatever i could to make him stay because that was my shoulder to lean on. i would cry to him i need to stop i need to stop. i lied numerous times to him, and yes i did end up comming clean as your boyfriend did. but the only reason i did it was so he would think im serious about him i couldn't loose him. you continuously lie and lie just to make sure the people don't leave you and than you come clean so they think you're doing the right thing. i always thought he didnt have enough "balls" to leave. so i would do whatever i wanted to him, smack him around, constantly argue with him just because i couldn't get my high. please take my advice - you have to leave. and if you really do love him - tell him you'll get back with him after you know for a fact hes better. and don't let him tell you hes changed after a week - because that's b/s. as much as it hurts you have to realize he's not who he was when you first met. you're dating the drugs... i really hope this helps.

[star12908]

does he hit you? does he lie to you? does he steal from you? no one is going to get clean unless they want to. have him court ordered to a drug rehab. then after hes better get back with him.