Just checking in

[xoesmom]

I've been gone for a while but I wanted to stop by and check in to let the ones of you who helped me know that I'm doing great. It's been a few months now and I have to say that I never thought I'd stay clean this long and feel this good about it. I've had no desire to use...even in the most stressful of times. I'm working a lot and I have MONEY LOL I spend it on my kids and things that matter instead of drugs now. I'm loving my life...things are far from perfect but it's still better without drugs, no matter what!

I do wish that the feelings of shame & regret would fade a bit. It's hard sometimes, I'll just be working or watching tv and something will pop in my head and I'll get a flashback of needles, things I did that hurt my family...just bad horrible things. It makes me cringe to this day and I am hoping that one day it won't hurt so much. But if that's the only price I have to pay for all the things I've done then so be it.

I also want to give hope & prayers to all the people who are here now in active addiction trying to get their lives back. It's totally possible. You could have never made me believe it, but I am proof that it is. Do whatever it takes...it is sooooo worth the pain of withdrawal!!

Thanks to all of you who stood by me and helped me thru the scary parts Hugs, love & prayers to you all!!

Susan

[moon6748]

Xoesmom, you sound great and I'm so happy for you!

I do wish that the feelings of shame & regret would fade a bit. It's hard sometimes

Ya, this can be the hardest part for me too. Our finances are still in shambles and it's going to be a long way out. Sometimes the regret and "what if's" can get overwhelming. When I feel myself sinking into them I just try to remember that I stopped the cycle, and that I can only fix how I behave today.

Congrats and hope your enjoying your CLEAN summer!

[caughtagain]

Hey Xoe... Glad to hear you are still fighting the fight... As far as regrets, Time does heal those feelings as you replace the good times with those of the past.. What will happen is, as time goes by those that love you will forgive you and those that don't are not worth having in your life.. We all make mistakes and forgiving yourself is apart of healing.. Give it time, you are doing great. All my best, Reid

[kathleen5hockey]

We all have those moments. Addicts, non-addicts. It's part of being human. Just tell yourself, I can't change the past, only the future. Good luck, you are doing great!

[ClassiqueMom]

hi xoesmom!!!

it is sooooooo good to see you back with a great report!!!
you have brought a smile to my heart today.. thank you for that!!!

be good to yourself! and never forget from whence you came!!
love,
Classique MoM