[MarieM42291]

I've been with my boyfriend since i was 15. I love him more than anything but sometimes I Can hate him just as much. He introduced me to oxycottons when I was 16 and I couldnt get enough of them. I didnt have a job so he would buy them. We did them together almost everyday for about two months. One day when i didnt have any left I started jonesing, felt like i was dying, and I thought to myself "I absolutely hate this. I;m never doing it again". And I didnt, and i made sure he never did it around me or was high around me, and then he eventually stopped too and things were good. About two months ago he was at my house and I knew he was high. We fought, he said he was sorry and he wouldnt do it again. Couple days later, noticed he was high again, we fought and broke up. A Few days later I find out from a very reliable source he's on straight up heroin. I was shocked, in total denial. But when I thought about it, it made perfect sense, he was acting so shady and treating me like ********, like he didnt care about anything anymore. So I took the tough love approach and told his family everything, knowing he would probably hate me for it. He moved back into his mom's house(she's a RN so i thought she'd be helpful, maybe), where he withdrawled and hes been clean for about a week, which i know isnt long at all but to someone who's addicted its a lifetime. My problem is I dont know what to do from here. Ive seen him a few times since then, Ive talked to him everyday, just so he knows Im still gonna be here for him, Im always gonna be his friend. But should I keep in contact with him? or should I not and make him realize what he's lost to drugs so that he'll feel motivated to get clean? And yes he's in a better envirnment now, his mom always makes sure he knows where hes at and with who, but is it enough? or is rehab the only answer? Im so confused and out of my league here. Plus, Ive lost my best friend and first love so im dealing with my own pain. Please help anything and everything is appreciated..

[TTTDogs]

Hey Marie,

Welcome to the forum - just wanted to tell you that I am sure others will be along shortly - to provide - family / friends advice - but I can offer up my suggestion to google an AlAnon meeting in your area - this would be a great place for you to seek excellent advice from people who have been there - it is for families of substance abuse users - and they will most likely have you set some serious boundaries for a continued relationship with you boyfriend - he is going to have to be committed to his recovery and these folks will train you on how to set those boundaries and support him at the same time

Your boyfriend is very lucky to have you in his life - and you did the right thing is outting him to his mother - I am sure she is grateful..... - I am in 8 days of recovery from a 10 year morphine addiction - so while I may know the power of addiction - I would not be the expert in advising you - however we have alot of families - and long recovered wise folks on here that I am sure will chime in and help you out - you did the right thing by coming to this forum -

I will follow your post

Hugs TTT

[kathleen5hockey]

I am very proud of you and you should be of yourself for getting clean and staying clean. My daughter is an addict. Boy, I wish I had the answer to what to do. Have tried everything. All I can say to anyone in this position is to keep your eyes open and heart guarded. Look at your life and where you want to be in 5-10 yrs. Love is a very fickle thing, sometimes it blinds you to the truth. That much I do know. Please beware that addicts lie and manipulate, it's hard to tell when they are doing it. Follow your instincts. Go to counceling and take care of YOU. Good luck.