I want to do this right... Anyone?

[winged eagle]

Man,i hope you get better and knowing how tough you are can believe you will.
I am a long ways off from you but you sound like a cool and very smart young man over there,Lol.I checked out your country and its beautiful over there,do yall have cash like the states and whats it really like there.
Hang tough and holler when you need some burst of energy.

Wrencher my pal!
LOL, it's weird how often I'm mistaken for a man via internet. Something about my writing style perhaps, but I do take it as a compliment, if the reasons behind it are an observed toughness, then yes, I'm quite tough when needed.
I really hope you're feeling better yourself.
Will check on you and everyone else after office hours, but in the meantime, here's some adrenaline your way

[wrencher99]

Wrencher my pal!
LOL, it's weird how often I'm mistaken for a man via internet. Something about my writing style perhaps, but I do take it as a compliment, if the reasons behind it are an observed toughness, then yes, I'm quite tough when needed.
I really hope you're feeling better yourself.
Will check on you and everyone else after office hours, but in the meantime, here's some adrenaline your way

Oh no,i am sorry about that and must have missed it somehow.I dont care if i am talking with man or woman but its nice to know,just your name on here may had me thinking that way.Thats nice to know anyways,i am just so happy for you and was curious about where you are at.The states have been in a slump for years now,but luckily i have a very good job that pays well just the fact i work on any kind of vehicles,equipment you name it i have been doing it for close to 30 years as i started when i was 13.And yes you are very strong at least it sure sounds like it,heres hoping and a prayer you feel better today and thanks hun.

[cherdox57]

Good morning Winged-eagle well at least it is morning here.
How are you doing today sweetie. Hope your feeling much better. It is great that you want to quit smoking those cigs. I was a smoker for 20 years.Been 19 years without a cig and no desire to ever go back to that nasty habit. My motivation to stop was my niece who had cancer.She was 11 years old at the time. She was a patient at Sloane Kettering in NY in the children's ward So devastating to see that many children with cancer and that was the catalyst for my brother-in-law and I to stop smoking. We made a pact that once she was done with Chemo we were done with smoking. It worked.Plus the money I saved LOL. I stopped smoking cold turkey. It was hard but I was able to feel good within 1 month. The hardest part was the first week. Not so different from tapering with the subs. Everytime I felt ansy I would take a long brisk walk outside. Exercise does the brain and body good. And I guess my motivation to get off the opiates is my unborn grandson. Sometimes we need a motivator to get us going.I know I do and when I put my mind to something I do it.
Yesterday was a little rough going to 4mg. Had alot of RLS in just my right leg Funny how it was just that leg. Some discomfort in my arms but I used a wet heating pad and wrapped it around my leg. By 10.00pm it was almost gone and finally got a little sleep. How do you sleep at night?
I was wondering since you said go thru briefs do you work in a law office?
I have a UPS Store. Can't remember if we ever sent anything to Lebanon. We ship all over the world. Check in on you later. Have a wonderful day.
Cherdox

[winged eagle]

Good morning Winged-eagle well at least it is morning here.
How are you doing today sweetie. Hope your feeling much better. It is great that you want to quit smoking those cigs. I was a smoker for 20 years.Been 19 years without a cig and no desire to ever go back to that nasty habit. My motivation to stop was my niece who had cancer.She was 11 years old at the time. She was a patient at Sloane Kettering in NY in the children's ward So devastating to see that many children with cancer and that was the catalyst for my brother-in-law and I to stop smoking. We made a pact that once she was done with Chemo we were done with smoking. It worked.Plus the money I saved LOL. I stopped smoking cold turkey. It was hard but I was able to feel good within 1 month. The hardest part was the first week. Not so different from tapering with the subs. Everytime I felt ansy I would take a long brisk walk outside. Exercise does the brain and body good. And I guess my motivation to get off the opiates is my unborn grandson. Sometimes we need a motivator to get us going.I know I do and when I put my mind to something I do it.
Yesterday was a little rough going to 4mg. Had alot of RLS in just my right leg Funny how it was just that leg. Some discomfort in my arms but I used a wet heating pad and wrapped it around my leg. By 10.00pm it was almost gone and finally got a little sleep. How do you sleep at night?
I was wondering since you said go thru briefs do you work in a law office?
I have a UPS Store. Can't remember if we ever sent anything to Lebanon. We ship all over the world. Check in on you later. Have a wonderful day.
Cherdox

Cher my dear,
I feel a bit better today. Last night was pretty rough. All in all got about 40 minutes of sleep before I had to drag myself to the office, and I'm still here.
Is it too crazy of me to log on while at the office? Bugger it all, I don't care at this point :P

I work in advertising, Saatchi & Saatchi if you've ever heard of it, as a creative writer. The requests come in the form of briefs, and I sometimes have to go through 15 a day, not to mention the 100s of requests that come in for ASAP work. My inbox sees traffic like you wouldn't believe (over 140 emails, most with briefs), so I have to read each, reply and get the work done.
It's a hectic schedule for everyone involved, but me more so, as what I do is not all that prevalent here. You don't usually come across English writers of a certain caliber in the region, so I'm basically doing something like 7 people's work (I am not exaggerating). Nor am I complaining. I usually thrive on it, too much energy all my life. But I had to lock myself in the bathroom for ten minutes this afternoon for a cry. It felt good, and I got right back to work.

My back is giving me the most problems. The pain subsides after every dose (the two of the day), and there are mood swings, but it's nothing I can't handle.

Brava for quitting that nasty habit. I won't CT it for that. I refuse to put my body through any more angst than necessary right now, and with the medication Melinda was talking about, it seems to be a good way to go.
Sorry you're having some issues at the moment, hang in there, am rooting for you so much.

P.S. How I wish I could bury my face into the fur of your three lovely doggies right now. I so miss the affection of such loyal and loving creatures. But my cats are awesome, too. I think I trained them to be dogs or something. They fetch and all lol.. Next they'll be barking

[winged eagle]

Oh no,i am sorry about that and must have missed it somehow.I dont care if i am talking with man or woman but its nice to know,just your name on here may had me thinking that way.Thats nice to know anyways,i am just so happy for you and was curious about where you are at.The states have been in a slump for years now,but luckily i have a very good job that pays well just the fact i work on any kind of vehicles,equipment you name it i have been doing it for close to 30 years as i started when i was 13.And yes you are very strong at least it sure sounds like it,heres hoping and a prayer you feel better today and thanks hun.

Lebanon didn't bear the brunt of the economic meltdown due to some brilliant maneuvering by our national bank years in advance. They've always been quite prudent when it comes to finances (of course, that doesn't apply to the internal "stealing", but hey, corruption's everywhere). So it's been a good few years here, the last major hiccup being the 2006 war. Anyway, not the place for politics :P
But Lebanon is truly a beautiful, chaotic, wonderful place. We have not less than 18 different sects living together on a tiny piece of lush, green land.
Jesus performed his first miracle in Qana, which is down south.
The alphabet was created here.
The first ships to ever set sail were also our own
I'm proud of my crazy heritage (am a big mix of many), so it pleases me when someone shows an interest. As half-Armenian, I'd also like you to know that Armenia was the FIRST country in the WORLD (before Rome) to become Christian.

You should visit Leb. The New York Times, LA Times, Lonely Planet and countless others called Beirut the top destination on earth last year. They're right. It rocks!

I lived in Dubai for a couple of years before moving back to Leb, and I was lucky to leave before it all came crashing down over there. I do feel sorry for so many of my ex-colleagues who lost their jobs in a country that's not their own (not a very secure feeling), but that's life, we all have setbacks, and most of us bounce back fine.

I'm glad your work wasn't affected as much, though I am aware of how the auto industry suffered stateside. Seems your work isn't confined to just that, so that's a blessing.
How are you feeling today? A bit more energetic, I hope?
You guys are really constantly on my mind, even in the midst of the insanity I work in. Thank you for your prayers. I know they help...

[winged eagle]

Robert, a technical question concerning usage that just came up circumstantially:
I have what seem to be withdrawal aches and pains, a cripplingly painful back, and of course, abdominal burning.
Now what I would do is suck it up, go to sleep and take my morning 2mg dose. But I'm doubting this decision due to some of your own responses in which you say not addressing an issue now will only jeopardise the process later. My confision arises here: We hadn't decided on the exact starting dose, I believe, 4.5/4 (?) I've been taking 4mg since yesterday. Do I simply wait and get over it and take the same 4mg tomorrow, or are you still attempting to stabilize me first, i.e. would prefer me to stay on 4.5 and then go down?
I was honestly going to sleep when this dichotomy (between what I'd do - not take - and what you may want) occurred to me. So I logged back on and am waiting for a response, hopefully you may see this soon (fingers crossed).
Thanks.

Yoohoo, Robert!
The above was posted last night (it's 8pm here the next day). I know you're having health problems, I'm only re-quoting the above because we're already on the third page (wow, how did that happen?) and I was afraid you'd miss it.
I ended up not doing anything about it, took my morning dose as usual, then my afternoon dose (2 and 2) today. (Told you'd I'd suck it up!)
But, the question still stands. When you have a moment, please
Again, not in any hurry, I can handle such minor inconveniences as a bad back for a few days. My only concern is, again, the stabilization before decrease. Since I'm on day 3 at 4mg, should I just keep doing that for a while until I feel better? The back pains, etc. are bound to diminish, right?
Anytime you're free
Thanks!

[Deleted17]

I just wanted to drop by your thread to show my support to you since you are on my thread showing your support all of the time.

I'm sorry to hear you are having back pain. This probably isn't anything even close to your situation, but I have a severe "S" curve in my spine and my vertebrae are constantly out of position, my neck is always out of place creating severe headaches and ribs are constantly popping out of place. It's a pain in the A$$. lol

Keep up your good work and keep the faith! We're all here for you. You're such a wonderful person and I truly look forward to hearing from you each day!

[Robert_325]

Yoohoo, Robert!
The above was posted last night (it's 8pm here the next day). I know you're having health problems, I'm only re-quoting the above because we're already on the third page (wow, how did that happen?) and I was afraid you'd miss it.
I ended up not doing anything about it, took my morning dose as usual, then my afternoon dose (2 and 2) today. (Told you'd I'd suck it up!)
But, the question still stands. When you have a moment, please
Again, not in any hurry, I can handle such minor inconveniences as a bad back for a few days. My only concern is, again, the stabilization before decrease. Since I'm on day 3 at 4mg, should I just keep doing that for a while until I feel better? The back pains, etc. are bound to diminish, right?
Anytime you're free
Thanks!

Stay at the dose you're at before dropping if you're not ready yet. Won't do it indefinitely but a few days is okay. This is one reason I mentioned getting a few extra pills would probably be a good idea. God bless.

[winged eagle]

Stay at the dose you're at before dropping if you're not ready yet. Won't do it indefinitely but a few days is okay. This is one reason I mentioned getting a few extra pills would probably be a good idea. God bless.

Hi Robert,
What with all your help to all kinds of people here, I know it can get to be too much. Basically, I think you kinda misunderstood my question And I'm embarrassed that I wasn't successful or clear enough in phrasing it (should do better than that I believe) Anyway, I was in physical pain, and perhaps it came out all warbled. Cool, though, I've managed to figure out what I needed to know.
Forget the above, here's an update for you, though I'll be keeping those to the minimum, I know the drill by now :P
Have been on 4mg for the third day/fourth day almost. Tomorrow's a long weekend. A couple of Advils a day can handle what's there (and some gumption, mentally and emotionally).
I believing in making use of a weekend (especially when work is hectic every other day of the week). Want me to try 3mg tomorrow?

P.S. It's the PM here, almost midnight. Tomorrow meaning next dose in the morning. So, 2 or 1.5?

[Robert_325]

Hi Robert,
What with all your help to all kinds of people here, I know it can get to be too much. Basically, I think you kinda misunderstood my question And I'm embarrassed that I wasn't successful or clear enough in phrasing it (should do better than that I believe) Anyway, I was in physical pain, and perhaps it came out all warbled. Cool, though, I've managed to figure out what I needed to know.
Forget the above, here's an update for you, though I'll be keeping those to the minimum, I know the drill by now :P
Have been on 4mg for the third day/fourth day almost. Tomorrow's a long weekend. A couple of Advils a day can handle what's there (and some gumption, mentally and emotionally).
I believing in making use of a weekend (especially when work is hectic every other day of the week). Want me to try 3mg tomorrow?

P.S. It's the PM here, almost midnight. Tomorrow meaning next dose in the morning. So, 2 or 1.5?

Eagle ..... sorry if I misunderstood. Yes if you are ready then I would take advantage of reducing while you're at this dose and drop to 3mg. You can see that it can easily get confusing for me as many people as I speak with. If I didn't have these posts to refer back to as my notes I wouldn't be able to keep up as closely as I do with everyone's history. I still get confused at times. lol I'm sure you'll do fine at 3mg,(1.5mg twice daily) you are obviously focused. We will talk soon. Get some sleep! God bless.

[cherdox57]

Funny how you said your cats will be barking next. One of my doxies(EMMA) gurgles like a cat.Sound like a purr LOL. My girls have been a blessing during the past years and especially the past months.
Your job sounds exciting but alot of work. And you do write well. Writing was never my forte. Give me numbers and I'm an ace. That is why I do the financial end of my business. Leave the selling up to my ex.Fortunate that I could stay home when I need to. I do most of the work from my house.

Isn't Dubai where The Sex and the City 2 girls went to on vacation?Did you get to see that movie?
Wish I could visit, I seldom if ever travel. Well maybe one day if I meet the right man.I only want to love and be loved again.
So it looks like your doing super. I can relate to your back issues.I also have problems but cant tell how bad until I am done with the suboxone. I excised in the pool today and now feel it a little. The heating pad is my best friend!!
Keep up the good work. Hopefully you will have a pleasurable weekend
Have FUN, FUN, Fun. Enjoy and Take Care
Cherdox

[wrencher99]

Hey my friend,you are one tough ladt thats for sure.I dont like this time thing,its 6:55 here and must be the middle of the nite where you are at.What is the weather like there,here its like 92 in day and 73 at night.I was just curious again about your country,never got a chance to talk to someone like you.Anyways stay strong and i always think of you,winged eagle is like when god comes thats where we will find the eagles gathering so i think.I got till tomorrow at 7 than i go to jail for the weekend and i will be around tomorrow for a little while,talk to you later.

[winged eagle]

Hey my friend,you are one tough ladt thats for sure.I dont like this time thing,its 6:55 here and must be the middle of the nite where you are at.What is the weather like there,here its like 92 in day and 73 at night.I was just curious again about your country,never got a chance to talk to someone like you.Anyways stay strong and i always think of you,winged eagle is like when god comes thats where we will find the eagles gathering so i think.I got till tomorrow at 7 than i go to jail for the weekend and i will be around tomorrow for a little while,talk to you later.

Wrencher, how long does your jail stint last? I'm aware of the circumstances, read it on your thread; man, that sucks. The system should do better than put an innocent man behind bars. BUT, you've done the right thing leading up to it. Getting clean in jail is no picnic. Let's say this is an extended stay away from everything for you, just to keep you clean.
I do worry about you; I hope where you're going isn't some maximum security institution, or a place you could easily get what you "want". You have to stay strong (and you are, I rarely come across such strength). Jail, in some respects, for some people can be a blessing. You're innocent of what they're accusing you of, but you are guilty of abusing your body. These mental tricks could help, I think. I just hope it's not a long stint.
Please let us know what to expect, how long you'll be away, etc.

The weather here is unbelievable. I just heard now, about half an hour ago, that it wasn't any old heat wave, some trouble from the sun, etc. Whatever the cause, Lebanon is usually a mild oasis surrounded by more and more desert. We used to have four, excellent seasons, with humid, hot summers in the capital. But the last couple of years we've noticed a big difference: the winters are much shorter, the summers crazy hot and humid. Yesterday we were in the mid 40s (Celsius). That's insane for Leb, man. That's almost like Dubai or Saudi Arabia.. almost... Global warming at work, huh... We do have plans on planting a crazy amount of trees in the next few years, experts believing we can stave off the worst of the effects that way. Remains to be seen...

Cher, Dubai is another emirate. The Sexy Girls (hehe) went to Abu Dhabi (supposedly); they actually filmed those scenes in Morocco, and to be honest, they tried their best, but Hollywood movies RARELY get our part of the world right, in any semblance. The movie did convey the correct level of luxury, though. Dubai, before the economic fall was so luxury-oriented it was shallow (in my view), plastic... Abu Dhabi (the capital of the Emirates) is a more, laid-back place, and since the economy tanked has taken the lead over Dubai. So, short summary for you both

It would be great if you guys could one day visit. I guarantee you'll have an unforgettable time. Most Americans and Europeans who come to this area, specifically Beirut, once, fall in love and decide to stay.There's something about the magnetism of this place. Not surprising when you think how all three major religions started and grew here, and how wars can break out so often. There's a lot of "energy" to the place.
If only we could use said energy for good use instead of putting up more separations between each other.
One day, hopefully.
Hugs to you both...

*Sorry about my long posts!

[winged eagle]

... winged eagle is like when god comes thats where we will find the eagles gathering ....

That's beautiful, Wrencher, my pal.
The reason I chose this name is that it can be both negative and positive. A winged creature flies and soars. But "winged" also means wounded, incapable of flight.
So I start off wounded, but then I'll be soaring again.
My friends are the ones who always said I was an eagle: solitary, soaring, strong
So, voila, the name

[winged eagle]

I just wanted to drop by your thread to show my support to you since you are on my thread showing your support all of the time.

I'm sorry to hear you are having back pain. This probably isn't anything even close to your situation, but I have a severe "S" curve in my spine and my vertebrae are constantly out of position, my neck is always out of place creating severe headaches and ribs are constantly popping out of place. It's a pain in the A$$. lol

Keep up your good work and keep the faith! We're all here for you. You're such a wonderful person and I truly look forward to hearing from you each day!

Carrie dearest,
You're right, it's NOTHING like your situation; I'm better off than that! Sorry you have to put up with all this. But I'm getting to know the lioness inside that academic exterior, and you're going to deal with everything, one thing at a time.
Is there no way to fix that curvature of the spine? I'm sure you've tried plenty, just curious... At work, our motto is: Impossible is nothing. And, there's a solution to everything. Even when it looks like there isn't. There's ALWAYS a good solution. Keep me updated on that as well, please.
Hugs hun!

[winged eagle]

Eagle ..... sorry if I misunderstood. Yes if you are ready then I would take advantage of reducing while you're at this dose and drop to 3mg. You can see that it can easily get confusing for me as many people as I speak with. If I didn't have these posts to refer back to as my notes I wouldn't be able to keep up as closely as I do with everyone's history. I still get confused at times. lol I'm sure you'll do fine at 3mg,(1.5mg twice daily) you are obviously focused. We will talk soon. Get some sleep! God bless.

Robert, come on man, I totally understand. A quick, cursory glance at this board and other areas of threads shows me the amount of people and requests you're dealing with.
I'm impressed that you can keep things straight at all!
Will let you know how it goes.
Much respect.

P.S. I really hope you're feeling better by now. Keep us updated, we do care!

[winged eagle]

Ok, here's how the mind works: Today is the first day I drop to 3mg total. It's almost 1pm here, so in two hours will take my second dose. My body has not had time to even NOTICE the drop YET already I was feeling aches and pains and whatnot, SO I got up, exercised my a$$ off for 45 minutes, felt the endorphines give me that rush, popped two Panadols, and let's be clear, people, I feel better

Ok, my back still hurts, but what do any of us expect after numbing ourselves for YEARS? In some ways, I enjoy the pains, they make me feel alive, and they give me a purpose.
I've always been that way. When I had that major knee surgery and was bedridden for a month, then on crutches for two, then one crutch for another few months, etc, the way I saw it was: I was bored outta my mind in Dubai (I was there at that point), so the physiotherapy was something to keep me preoccupied. Man, it hurt, but I felt good about it. And I proved the doctors WRONG. They said I'd be limping for life. I don't limp. I can run now. Doctors, we're just a statistic to them

I'm not a number. I'm my own person, and very competitive, so walking into my surgeon's office 6 months after the op, without a sign of limping was such a great feeling. Took me back to the days when I would score over 40 points in a basketball game.
Sports can give you the best high. I never regret anything, it's a waste of time, something a la a rocking chair, gives you something to do, doesn't get you anywhere; but I sometimes wonder how things would have turned out had I not substituted that natural high with the one from chemicals.

Just posting to get some things off my chest. By all means, please don't read if not inclined LOL, this is just for me, or anyone who'd be interested.
Cheers people, life can be good, even when you think it ain't.

[wrencher99]

Wrencher, how long does your jail stint last? I'm aware of the circumstances, read it on your thread; man, that sucks. The system should do better than put an innocent man behind bars. BUT, you've done the right thing leading up to it. Getting clean in jail is no picnic. Let's say this is an extended stay away from everything for you, just to keep you clean.
I do worry about you; I hope where you're going isn't some maximum security institution, or a place you could easily get what you "want". You have to stay strong (and you are, I rarely come across such strength). Jail, in some respects, for some people can be a blessing. You're innocent of what they're accusing you of, but you are guilty of abusing your body. These mental tricks could help, I think. I just hope it's not a long stint.
Please let us know what to expect, how long you'll be away, etc.
They gave me 10 years suspended upon service of 90 days in jail,5 years probation too.I woke up after 4 hours sleep last night,thats the part thats killing me.I feel like i am over or starting to feel better just not sleeping.I cant make a whole days work rite now,thinking about when i get off at lunchtime to go back to dr and tell him i need something stronger that lunestra.This jail sucks big time,was in there for 28 days while they played with my papers and my lawyer had to get pissed and write a bunch of big dogs.You get nothing in there,i just dont want to be in a box all weekend wide awake and i am going to take my cpap machine and prob wont let me use it.I did a bunch of sleep studys,always quit breathing in my sleep so i have a machine.

[winged eagle]

Hey Wrencher, yes, I read about your sleep problems and the machine (sleep apnia I think it's called?)
Dude, get your lawyer to INSIST on the machine with you, this is a serious health issue, the law has NO RIGHT to endanger you while they supposedly "rehabilitate" you. Tell them you'll sue them to the ends of the earth if anything were to happen to you. Threaten them, get your lawyer to haul in the big dogs, anything to make sure that your stay in there is not dangerous for you. It's not supposed to be a vacation, but they can't put your life at risk like that. I'm not a lawyer, but that sure doesn't sound right. Please, PLEASE talk to your lawyer about this.

The sleep WILL come, Wrencher, it will. Soon, too. I promise. I've been down the cold turkey road far too often than I like to mention, and I'm certain of this. But you have another issue altogether, and you MUST be allowed to be safe while in that cell.
I'm really infuriated about this, wish I could pick up the phone and do some yelling on your behalf. Don't let them push you more than is necessary. You still have rights. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS.
Seriously, I'm here, anytime, anyhow for you. If there's anything I can do to help, you let me know.
Hugs (wish it weren't virtual, but hey, it's all I can give for now )

[winged eagle]

Just wanted to add something at this point.
I'm a voracious reader. I can sometimes go through a book a day. Not bragging, there's a point to this: I have been reading here, and across the internet like crazy. I know the numbers of addicts here in Leb: 70% of our mothers are put on pills like Xanax and Ativan and anti-depressants of every sort, not to mention our youth are on every drug imaginable. The situation is totally out of hand.
Cheeky says the same about Scotland and NZ. Some others posters here state the numbers where they live. The people in Pakistan/Afghanistan/Iran are, for the majority, on opium or heroin. The US has issues. Europe has issues. Whether it's the 3rd, 2nd or 1st world, HUGE problems with drug usage, whether legit or otherwise.
Why?
Why is the majority of the planet numbed/jacked up/sedated/doped/etc?
I know people need to take responsibility for what they choose to put into their bodies. But I'm beginning to believe that those in charge are not so innocent.
We already know how the pharmaceutical companies milk you for everything you've got. Legitimate studies that don't fall within the expected parameters are cast aside and silenced. Doctors are bribed into prescribing either something you DON'T need or a drug affiliated only to the bribers, even if a better option is out there for you.
In my honest opinion, I'm starting to believe it's not the governments or the political lobbies or any such thing with the true power. That lies firmly in the hands of those people I can only call drug pushers, even when they're wearing a lab coat or a business suit.
It's a shame that humanity has come to this.
Just wanted to vent about that. I don't know if anyone can do anything about it, but there you have it.
Of course, I am not talking about all the people who have been helped with medication. I'm talking about the cases (the majority, as I see it) that are being used as guinea pigs, a means of control, whatever you want to call it.
Peace, people. We have only ourselves to depend on. And each other.

[Robert_325]

Robert, come on man, I totally understand. A quick, cursory glance at this board and other areas of threads shows me the amount of people and requests you're dealing with.
I'm impressed that you can keep things straight at all!
Will let you know how it goes.
Much respect.

P.S. I really hope you're feeling better by now. Keep us updated, we do care!

eagle ....... Thanks for your concerns. i appreciate it as I don't talk much about my personal issues. It's just not the role I assumed on this forum. I'm off the antibiotics from my staph infection finally, my energy is now starting to return. The dr probably saved my life as I was VERY sick and staph infections can easily be fatal. But it's getting better.

We bought a place in a rural community, I mean we live out in the woods, very few neighbors at all, paid cash for the house and some acreage, and retired. We have deer running through our yard miost days, it's very cool. I was skeptical of this small town dr initially but I'm now totally impressed with him. He has both Melinda's and my blood pressure under control and I was running consistently around 180/130 while on medication and Melinda's was almost as high. So I will bow to this guy at my next appointment. He also found some other problems in my bloodwork and they have been corrected. He's done this all in about five visits including saving my life. He is from the middle east and I totally respect him now. He's a very top-notch dr.

I would LOVE to walk the streets where Jesus performed the first miracle, turning water into wine at his friend's wedding. The history there would be so fascinating for me as a Christian. I hope that Melinda and I will make it there one day. I know that we would feel His prescence everywhere. It would totally humble me! The thought of it sends exciting chills down my spine!

You're doing a great job. Take anything OTC that will help you with body aches. Kava (the supplement) is great for anxiety. Sleep aids are okay if you need them too. And exercise is the best medicine there is for someone in opiate w/d getting your natural endorphine production back on track which helps with your overall well-being.

You're going to be another success story I can tell already. Take care and we'll talk again soon. Later. God bless.

[karaboo]

Winged,

I had to comment on your name . I've read your posts from the beginning and wow, you're an inspiration! When I saw your first post, I thought of the verse in Isaiah, and they shall soar on wings like eagles . Believe me friend, you are already soaring!

[cherdox57]

I totally agree with you Winged. The doctors need patients so I think they get you hooked to a certain degree. I now wonder why my doctor did not tell me about hyperalgesia and what that could do to my body. He should have either not upped my pain meds over the years or told me it is time to reduce your meds because that could be the reason of your pain. I think Suboxone is also being pushed instead of using Sobutex. At least for people like myself who did not use it as a recreational drug. The headaches I had at the high dose could have been avoided. But its all about MONEY. Guess GREED is also an addiction!
Yes, we must be our own advocates. I do not trust doctors today. It has become just a business to many. Hard to find the good ones who still believe in the hypocratic oath they took. I think I found a great doctor who is treating me now. Even though the cost was high it was reasonable compared to other pain docs who do the same thing. He has been trying to hook up with the insurance companies who will not allow him to do this in his office and cover the patients. How sick is that. He could help so many that cant afford his fee which was $800. He has a slew of written testimonials on his wall. I read them and it eased me to know I was in good hands.
Plus people like Robert on here have done such a good service. Just need the Suboxone to be assessable.
Winged I look forward to your posts each day. Thank you and be well. Hope your having a terrific weekend.
Cherdox

[winged eagle]

eagle .......
... So I will bow to this guy at my next appointment. He also found some other problems in my bloodwork and they have been corrected. He's done this all in about five visits including saving my life. He is from the middle east and I totally respect him now. He's a very top-notch dr.

I would LOVE to walk the streets where Jesus performed the first miracle, turning water into wine at his friend's wedding. The history there would be so fascinating for me as a Christian. I hope that Melinda and I will make it there one day. I know that we would feel His prescence everywhere. It would totally humble me! The thought of it sends exciting chills down my spine!

Robert, very serious here:
First off, I really, really do care about your health. You may have just met me, but I feel I know you like a brother, been silently reading you for over a year. I am very invested emotionally in you being better.
Second, and I really mean this:
You and your wonderful wife Melissa are welcome to be my guest here ANY TIME you can make the trip. I totally mean that. Ask your Middle Eastern doctor about our hospitality (no one else can compare to it) I would be honored to take you to all the places that I know will have deep meaning for you both (and a few other places just to let loose ). You just tell me when. Again, this is a serious invitation to you both. Anytime. And no hotels, either. I live in the capital for work, but also have a home in the mountains, with plenty of room.

As for the part about you being impressed with your doc from our part of the world. I'm not surprised. We have excellent talent here, be it of the medical, artistic, cultural, etc type, you name it, we can top it. Am I bragging all too much? Maybe it's national pride or something, but I think it's more like a fact.

As for being a success story, I don't want to come across as overly arrogant, but I think you already have an idea about how strongly I feel about getting clean for good. Now multiply that to the nth degree and you'll see where I'm at
Please let Melinda know about the above. It would be an honor to not only met you one day, but to have some fun together.
Much respect to you both.

[winged eagle]

Melinda, not Melissa! Sorry, don't usually make such a mistake! (embarrassed).
heheh... anyway, please no offense meant, I sometimes think I know your names better than my own, so that was one stupid faux pas...

[winged eagle]

Winged,

I had to comment on your name . I've read your posts from the beginning and wow, you're an inspiration! When I saw your first post, I thought of the verse in Isaiah, and they shall soar on wings like eagles . Believe me friend, you are already soaring!

Hugs Karaboo! Been reading you around the forum, too.
Can you give me a link to your thread (not sure, maybe I already read it, but have been skimming a lot today, so a tad confused).
Thank you for such a lovely post. Honestly, you made my day

[winged eagle]

I totally agree with you Winged. The doctors need patients so I think they get you hooked to a certain degree. I now wonder why my doctor did not tell me about hyperalgesia and what that could do to my body. He should have either not upped my pain meds over the years or told me it is time to reduce your meds because that could be the reason of your pain. I think Suboxone is also being pushed instead of using Sobutex. At least for people like myself who did not use it as a recreational drug. The headaches I had at the high dose could have been avoided. But its all about MONEY. Guess GREED is also an addiction!
Yes, we must be our own advocates. I do not trust doctors today. It has become just a business to many. Hard to find the good ones who still believe in the hypocratic oath they took. I think I found a great doctor who is treating me now. Even though the cost was high it was reasonable compared to other pain docs who do the same thing. He has been trying to hook up with the insurance companies who will not allow him to do this in his office and cover the patients. How sick is that. He could help so many that cant afford his fee which was $800. He has a slew of written testimonials on his wall. I read them and it eased me to know I was in good hands.
Plus people like Robert on here have done such a good service. Just need the Suboxone to be assessable.
Winged I look forward to your posts each day. Thank you and be well. Hope your having a terrific weekend.
Cherdox

Cher my cherie,
It's unfortunate, so many doctors do enter the medical field with the best of intentions, but they're swamped by this huge money-making machine. It's too big to fight. So they either join the party, or keep struggling, trying to help whoever they can.
Awareness is our only key out of his quagmire, and it is such forums as this that help the masses I was mentioning. Bless them all here for everything they are trying to do. It's like swimming against the tide, some make it, some, unfortunately, don't.
It's a fight, every day.
I also look forward to you posts! Always checking in on you, reading all the time, even if I don't post as much as I'd like to on all the threads.
xoxox

P.S. How goes it today? Read you swam a bit, I think that's an excellent way to exercise

[Robert_325]

Robert, very serious here:
First off, I really, really do care about your health. You may have just met me, but I feel I know you like a brother, been silently reading you for over a year. I am very invested emotionally in you being better.
Second, and I really mean this:
You and your wonderful wife Melissa are welcome to be my guest here ANY TIME you can make the trip. I totally mean that. Ask your Middle Eastern doctor about our hospitality (no one else can compare to it) I would be honored to take you to all the places that I know will have deep meaning for you both (and a few other places just to let loose ). You just tell me when. Again, this is a serious invitation to you both. Anytime. And no hotels, either. I live in the capital for work, but also have a home in the mountains, with plenty of room.

As for the part about you being impressed with your doc from our part of the world. I'm not surprised. We have excellent talent here, be it of the medical, artistic, cultural, etc type, you name it, we can top it. Am I bragging all too much? Maybe it's national pride or something, but I think it's more like a fact.

As for being a success story, I don't want to come across as overly arrogant, but I think you already have an idea about how strongly I feel about getting clean for good. Now multiply that to the nth degree and you'll see where I'm at
Please let Melinda know about the above. It would be an honor to not only met you one day, but to have some fun together.
Much respect to you both.

Thanks so much for the invitation. It's something that we would have to think about and plan well in advance but I will definitely remember your kind offer. That would be a great trip that we would always remember and treasure. It's not something we could do in the immediate future but we may surprise you sometime. God bless.

[Robert_325]

I totally agree with you Winged. The doctors need patients so I think they get you hooked to a certain degree. I now wonder why my doctor did not tell me about hyperalgesia and what that could do to my body. He should have either not upped my pain meds over the years or told me it is time to reduce your meds because that could be the reason of your pain. I think Suboxone is also being pushed instead of using Sobutex. At least for people like myself who did not use it as a recreational drug. The headaches I had at the high dose could have been avoided. But its all about MONEY. Guess GREED is also an addiction!
Yes, we must be our own advocates. I do not trust doctors today. It has become just a business to many. Hard to find the good ones who still believe in the hypocratic oath they took. I think I found a great doctor who is treating me now. Even though the cost was high it was reasonable compared to other pain docs who do the same thing. He has been trying to hook up with the insurance companies who will not allow him to do this in his office and cover the patients. How sick is that. He could help so many that cant afford his fee which was $800. He has a slew of written testimonials on his wall. I read them and it eased me to know I was in good hands.Plus people like Robert on here have done such a good service. Just need the Suboxone to be assessable.
Winged I look forward to your posts each day. Thank you and be well. Hope your having a terrific weekend.
Cherdox

cherdox ......... When I was in rehab my dr was the chief of staff of one of the largest hospitals for dependency rehabilitation in the city where I live. His fee for new patients to this day (as I still talk with him regularly as he asks me lots of questions about tapers and inductions) is $150.

We have become friends over the years and he uses the sub plan we use on this forum for his patients to this day. After you're an established patient visits are $120 and he even did some of my old appointments by telephone consultation once he grew to trust me. And the insurance company paid for him just like any other dr. Some of the bandit sub drs tell patients it's cash only so they can charge absurd fees. I know a few other drs I've spoken with who charge similarly. But these are very established drs that would continue with their lives just fine if they never had any sub patients at all. These drs all use subutex if it's called for, especially after I've talked with them, as suboxone should only be used by people who are prone to abusing the meds with IV use unless they prove themselves untrustworthy while in treatment.

There are way too many sub drs that have people completely "snowed" on what a fair and acceptable fee should be. I mean you walk in, talk for a few minutes and get a prescription. Why should that cost anymore than any other dr would charge? I personally think charging a patient $800 for anything except a surgical procedure is totally out of line. That's just my opinion. That's why they haven't gotten the insurance companies to agree to cover the costs. No insurance company is going to pay some dr to financially rape a patient. But all the legitimate insurance companies pay for sub drs and the meds by drs who charge reasonable and customary charges. That's a fact. God bless.

[winged eagle]

Robert, you've probably already thought about this, but how about this forum compiles a list of doctors such as your friend? Ones across the region there that people who read here can consult with some trust and that don't "rape" them financially/emotionally and, ultimately, in a (somehow) physical sense?
Don't know, just occurred to me it might be an interesting endeavor. Sure to help heaps of folk...