Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 135
how rude
  1. #1
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default how rude

    OK, I know this is totally off the subject of drugs, but how rude is it for your boyfriend to make this comment? Ok, I went and changed into this pink pair of victoria secret sweat pants type of things, and a wife beater, I know it looks scruby but I am getting ready to clean our jaqusi with bleach..anyhow I walked in the living room and told him his bro was here outside, he said well get out of here looking like that, its not a turn on, well I thought he was joking so I got on top of him and I said you know it turns you on baby...he said no really it doesnt, I said well you get off when you **** me so I have to turn you on in one way or another he said no you dont, its just a *****...I mean is that wrong to say on so many different levels? Any suggestions? what could I do to turn him on? I am 3 months pregnant and the last thing I want or need is him running around on me because I dont turn him on, I wonder if I ever have?????hmmm...what could I try to turn him on and spice up are almost non existing sex life??? any suggestions would be greatly appreciated..thanks..
    Liz Ann

  2. #2
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Liz Ann,
    Was he kidding? Are you being emotional because you are pregnant? Didn't you just let him go see kid rock with a chic! There has to be trust there for you to do that!

    June

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  3. #3
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    No, he wasnt kidding abou tthe comment he made to me, but I do trust him, unless he gives me a reason not to, but he never has, he has always been faithful from what I know, even when he and I seperated, we we still sleeping togther, I heard this girl was here at his house, and the nosy neighbor lady was here and she told me todd backed away from her when she was hitting on him trying to seduce him, so I think if he passed down another women when we were seperated, hes got to be faithful, plus when I questioned him, he said why would I have you move back here and then go cheat on you it makes no since, he said he wouldnt be with me if he was interested in other women, I just fear if I am not satisfying him, hell go look somewhere else, and I know I am a bit overemotional right now, maybe thats why his comment got to me but it still hurt my feelings in a way...any suggestions to spice it up a bit? how can I make it so I turn him on...I need some advice on that...

  4. #4
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Initiate sex! Most guys love when a women will take control. Hell grab some string and tie his hands to the bed post. Tell him he hurt you now your gonna spank him!

    Or talk dirty! I notice with mine when I say something dirty when he isn't expecting it, it becomes inticing for him.

    Play make believe. Dress up in something else like a maid or a school girl! Anything to catch his eye!

    One more that always works for me is the porn. When all else fails I know I can pop a porn in and Everything is great!

    I have more if you need them!

    June

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  5. #5
    lordy is offline Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    100

    Default

    Sweetchikk, just my two-cents-worth. I think your boyfriend was jealous about his brother seeing you. (Does he think you have the hots for his bro, or vice-verca?) That sounds like a classic insecurity/jealously response...

    Nicole

  6. #6
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Good call nicole! I wasn't even thinking that way! Way to look deeper into it! Maybe he is insecure!

    June

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  7. #7
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    you know I never even thought about that, its possible maybe hes real jealous over me or something, I sure can tell you I do not have the hots for his big bro though, beside his big bro is like32 years old and hes a virgin,never had 1 girlfriend, we think hes gay anyways...but I am not like that, I dont keep it in the family, I dont need to be on jerry springer, he should know better then that but it is possible, maybe htats why he made the ignorant comment..???I will have to think about that...thanks guys...

  8. #8
    justwhatever is offline Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    133

    Default

    sweet chick---

    the comment sounded way off base to me. Pink pants and a wife beater is sexy. I like the jealousy reasoning. Maybe you should give it a little time and explain to him how you're feeling. Would he be receptive to that?

    amanda

  9. #9
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    well I mentioned to him that he hurt my feelings, and he said psh whatevr and he laughed but the whole thing is I know he wasnt joking when he made the comment to me, I just want him to be interested in me still...if I dont have that...what do I have?I will end up losing him...think maybe if I start having the house spotless when he gets home from work, and I am wearing makeup and nice clothes, and if I make the kids look real cute every day, do their hair and what not, do you think that will help anything? I mean dont get me wrong we dont look like bums everyday and the house isnt trashed or anything but I need ideas to spice things up and keep him interested so I dont lose him....help lme people, what can I do?????????

    Liz

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , USA.
    Posts
    41

    Default

    ARE YOU MARRIED ? if he said that he is just being a ****and you should ignore it if you can ...plus get some rose peddles put them on the floor going to your bedroom put them all over your bed put candles all ove the room turn off the light and put on lingerie and when he comes home he will find you like that it has too turn him on if hes a real man!!!!!!!
    quote:Originally posted by sweetchikk05

    well I mentioned to him that he hurt my feelings, and he said psh whatevr and he laughed but the whole thing is I know he wasnt joking when he made the comment to me, I just want him to be interested in me still...if I dont have that...what do I have?I will end up losing him...think maybe if I start having the house spotless when he gets home from work, and I am wearing makeup and nice clothes, and if I make the kids look real cute every day, do their hair and what not, do you think that will help anything? I mean dont get me wrong we dont look like bums everyday and the house isnt trashed or anything but I need ideas to spice things up and keep him interested so I dont lose him....help lme people, what can I do?????????

    Liz

  11. #11
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    I am sorry that what he said really hurt you! Think he could have just been in a mood? I know relationships are really hard and they do take work so time. I don't think it should matter what the house looks like or the kids. Does he say things often? I don't think its something with you maybe him?


    June

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  12. #12
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    todd and I arent married, he has made comments like that to me before when were fighting or something, dont get me wrong I have said mean things to him, but only when we are fighting, and I know we both dont mean what we say when that happens, but very rarely does he make comments to me like that when we are getting along, and yesterday, for some reason, we were getting along very well, thats why it through me off guard when he said what he did, I am just going to assume he was jealous and didnt want his bro to see me hardly dressed, it will make me feel better if I knew it was jealousy rather then him meaning what he said because it did hurt my feelings, I am a very sensitive person when it comes to his feelings towards me, I dont ever want to lose him, I love him more than you can imagine, we have split up a few times and those were the worst days of my life, I never went a day without thinking about him, I just dont want to ever leave him or him to leave me, I love him too much, thats why I want to make sure I am making him happy, I dont want to take the chance of another women taking him away from me...I just want to make him happy..thank you for the ideas of how to spice things up, although hes not a very romantic guy, but I will try my hardest, thank you all for the advice..ttyl

    Liz Ann

  13. #13
    justwhatever is offline Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    133

    Default

    sweet chick---

    I know relationships are hard and confusing. I can't imagine what it would be like with kids thrown into the mix. It sounds like you have a lot going on in your life. If he isn't a romantic guy, what does make him happy? You can't be the perfect wife with the spotless house and kids every single day, that's impossible and unfair to you. My boyfriend is the type of guy that cleaning the house and making my self look nice would make him happy- but he is a neat freak. You know him better than anyone, what simple thing could you do for him? Have you tried writing him notes or letters? Someone suggested this to me when I couldn't communicate with my boyfriend, and at first I thought it sounded childish. Turns out, it was the best advice I could have gotten. We write each other notes all the time, it really helps things-- I leave him little sexy notes, or tell him how I am feeling, and writing things down really stops me from unloading all my anger on him and saying things I don't mean. Especially when we're arguing or my feelings are hurt. writing things down probably stopped us from killing each other ha

    amanda

  14. #14
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    I have tried the writing letters thing on and off for 4 years now, the last one I wrote him was 2 weeks ago, took me over 2 hrs to write it, I put it in his hat for him to take it to work with him, he didnt even take it, he left it on the counter, then I asked him why he didnt read it, he told me my letters are lame, he hates reading them and its childish, I got real upset and ripped it up, I started crying and told him he will never know what I am feeling if I cant express myself to him, he didnt even care, so letters are out for good, and as far as anything else goes, I dont know how to please him, I try so hard all the time, I might as well give up, if he finds someone better then so be it, I just want him to be happy, If he cant find happiness with me, well I will gie it some more time and if I can see he isnt happy with me, I will move on so he can too, I feel like I am invading his life, like I am in the way, its weird and very hard to explain, I just want him to be happy is all...thanks for all the advice everybody!!!'
    Liz

  15. #15
    lizery is offline Member
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    182

    Default

    **I just want him to be happy, If he cant find happiness with me, well I will gie it some more time and if I can see he isnt happy with me, I will move on so he can too, I feel like I am invading his life, like I am in the way, its weird and very hard to explain, I just want him to be happy is all...**

    Come again? Do you hear yourself? I am sorry but this really sticks in my craw. What about your happiness? He should be ****ing bending over BACKWARDS to make you happy. If he really loves you, he needs to figure out a decent way to show it. Believe me, I have been there, why doesn't he love me? If he loved me, he would do XYZ. I had to hear the harsh truth from my therapist and that is we only get treated the way we let people treat us. We have to OWN it. Only you alone is responsible for being happy and getting the treatment you deserve. I hope this doesn't come across harsh but it just makes me so mad for him to be treating you this way.

    Liz


    just hold on

  16. #16
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Liz,
    Your breaking my heart with these posts.[V] I feel soooo bad for you! I know its a hard place because I know that in a way you feel obligated to do amazing things for him. WHAT ABOUT YOU! You can only handle so much! He should be thinking the same for you! What can I do to make Liz happy today! Liz, You DESERVE it! I'm surprised you haven't relapsed because of him! I know on the other board you said you were close to relapsing, was this recently? Don't let him run you life! You took the control back from the pills now do yourself another favor, DON'T LET ANYONE TREAT YOU LIKE ****! He needs a reality check!

    June

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  17. #17
    justwhatever is offline Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    133

    Default

    I tend to agree with "lizery"
    What the heck is his problem? If he doesn't care enough to hear you out or read a letter you wrote him, he isn't worth your time. I know you have kids, so that makes things more complicated, but this guy obviously doesn't support you and says things that he knows will hurt your feelings. Especially knowing that you are pregnant, you don't deserve to take his bs. he probably senses that you are trying really hard to please him, and he's being a jerk on purpose. I know there are two sides to every story, but from what you say about this guy, he is not worth your time. You have to believe that you are worthy of being treated with respect and love. By staying with a guy that doesn't treat you right, you are allowing yourself to be victimized. Do you have any family around, or solid friends to talk to about it?

    amanda

  18. #18
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Liz,
    You are making me nervous! You haven't posted anything and the last thing I want is for you to have noone to talk to. I want you to let us know your alright! I feel soooooo bad for the situation! How long have you felt this way (not that it should) but it does because when I was talking to you before you said you moved back in and things were good. Was this your decision or his?

    Not so clueless,

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  19. #19
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    I AM HERE AND I AM OK, TODD AND I GOT IN A REALLY BAD FIGHT LASTNIGHT, WE ARE OK NOW THOUGH, HE APPOLIGIZED, I TOLD HIM IF HE WANTS ME TO BE THERE FOR HIM THEN HE NEEDS TO BE THERE FOR ME TOO, HE WANTS TO TAKE ME AND THE KIDS OUT FOR DINNER TONIGHT, I WILL LET YOU ALL KNOW HOW THAT GOES, I KNOW I DONT DESERVE TO BE TREATED LIKE ****, BUT THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS GOING ON AROUND HERE, I AM GOING TO GIVE IT SOME MORE TIME AND SEE HOW THINGS GO, RIGHT NOW I CANT AFFORD TO BE ON MY OWN, SO IF I DECIDE TO LEAVE EVENTUALLY, I NEED TO GET BACK ON MY FEET AGAIN BEFORE THATS POSSIBLE, I WILL KEEP YOU ALL POSTED ON HOW THINGS ARE GOING..TAKE CARE EVERYONE AND THANK YOU AGAIN FOR THE ADVICE...
    LIZ

  20. #20
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Liz,
    I'm sooooo happy to hear that! You deserve to be loved and treated right!



    Not so clueless,

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  21. #21
    debbie724 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    267

    Default

    Liz Ann, I think that you need to call out for some male opinions. You will probably get a wake up call from them. Pink Victoria Secret's Sweats and a wife beater... that sounds really sexy... 3 months pregnant or not! Your boyfriend sounds REALLY suspicious! What do you feel in your heart? REALLY truly feel? Be honest with yourself!


    debbie

  22. #22
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    SEE THE WHOLE THING IS IS DEEP DOWN IN MY HEART, I TRULY LOVE HIM AND I THINK THATS WHY I PUT UP WITH THE BS THAT COMES ALONG, I MEAN YOU CANT TELL ME EVERY RELATIONSHIP IS PERFECT, EVERYONE FIGHTS, I AM SURE WE DO IT MORE, BUT HEY, LIKE I SAID I WILL GIVE IT TIME..

    LIZ

  23. #23
    justwhatever is offline Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    133

    Default

    how did dinner go?

  24. #24
    Rscprincess1 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    341

    Default

    sweetchikk05

    Maybe Im Putting My Nose In Where It Dont Belong But From All Your Posts On This Topic I Am Going To Say What I Have To Say And Only Because I Have Been Through It. Take It As You Will Its Just A Piece Of Advice.

    I Am Glad You All Made Up But You Have To Make Sure He Knows That These Little Comments Hurt Your Feelings And If He Passes Them Off Like " Whatever " Then He Really Has No Respect For You.

    No Matter What You Wear Or How You Look Right Now You Should Be The Sexiest Thing In The World To Him Considering You Are Carring His Baby.

    A Pregnant Woman No Matter Who It Is, Are The Prettiest Women In The World And He Needs To Realize That.

    Dont Let Him Make Those Comments To You.

    Sometimes Love Isnt Enough To Make A Relationship Work. There Has To Be Respect And Trust In There Too.

    I Really Hope All Works Out For The Best For You And Good Luck With Your Pregnacy And The Birth Of Your Little Miracle.

    If You Ever Need To Talk Send Me An Email.

    miserysprincess@gmail.com

    Take Care, Beth

  25. #25
    sweetchikk05 is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    824

    Default

    DINNER WENT WELL, WE ARE GETTING ALONG GOOD...
    WE EVEN CAME HOME AND MADE FRUIT DRINKS...HE BOUGHT A NEW JUICER, THEY ARE AWESOME...
    THEN WE WATCHED BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN...GOOD MOVIE...
    TALK TO YOU LATER
    LIZ ANN

  26. #26
    lordy is offline Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    100

    Default

    Liz,
    I'm with June. I think your boyfriend needs to worry about himself for a change. Get strong! Lift weights! Go out with friends! Act slightly aloof! Todd sounds insecure to me, and it would be nice if he could cut through his own **** to admit it. You're working on your stuff; why shouldn't he?
    I'm telling you: being a little more independent, just a little bit mysterious, is the way to go. Let HIM wonder what YOU want, for a change. Don't fawn too much. It will make him want to push you away. (ps,I haven't forgotten that you are pregnant, and I know how much more emotional you must be feeling. My first trimester-- with both of my sons-- was the ONLY time in my nine-year marriage that I ever wanted to divorce my husband, and I was 100% serious about it. That is until my hormones got back to normal. []
    It's possible, I think, that Todd is insecure enough that he has to bring you down to his level, make you feel bad and insecure to even the score, as it were. And we all know that that is just wrong. If you're strong, eventually he'll see that you are stronger, emotionally, then he is, and he'll start needing *you* more. Does that make sense?
    Please yourself. Yesterday I went to See's candy and bought myself a two-pound heart-shaped box of chocolates, just for me, just for kicking, just because I wanted them. It felt amazing, to treat myself nicely, for a change. I also have a habit of occasionally taking myself to a movie, or to a nice hotel (when I can afford it) for a night. Grant's happy to watch the kids, and it makes me feel really happy and centered. You're raising the kids, after all-- right? If you were a stay-at-home mom, what kind of a salary would you deserve? One time I realized that I felt guilty about spending "family" money for something like clothes, and I got really mad at myself. The fact is, daycare is expensive-- and when you throw in all the other stuff, laundry, mopping, cooking, toilet-scrubbing, errand-running, all that-- well, if you were being paid for your time, it would be a decent wage. So don't feel guilty about pampering yourself. You work, just like anyone else.
    Okay, now I'm just blabbing. I'm going to go eat some chocloate.
    Nicole

  27. #27
    cluelessNJ is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , .
    Posts
    621

    Default

    Liz Ann,
    I am glad dinner went well! A night without fighting can be great and relaxing! Maybe you just needed sometime together without the stress of your daily chores! I still think wife beaters are hot! I wear them all the time and my boyfriend thinks i'm thye sexiest when I am comfortable and not painting a face on for him! Let us know how everything goes!

    Not so clueless,

    CLEAN DATE 1/23/06

  28. #28
    Shifty is offline Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    125

    Default

    quote:Originally posted by debbie724

    Liz Ann, I think that you need to call out for some male opinions. You will probably get a wake up call from them. Pink Victoria Secret's Sweats and a wife beater... that sounds really sexy... 3 months pregnant or not! Your boyfriend sounds REALLY suspicious! What do you feel in your heart? REALLY truly feel? Be honest with yourself!
    Hi Debbie, Liz,

    I would give my opinion, but I have a pregnancy fetish, so it wouldn't count

    Sounds like this guy has the upper hand in your relationship and he has a way of pushing your buttons and making you dance. I don't have any specific advice for you because every situation is different.

    Do you really want to be in a relationship with somebody who constantly manipulates you and shows disinterest in things that are important to you? Or are you misinterpreting everything that is happening because of your overactive prego hormones?

    I was gonna write a section on how to regain "hand" in your relationship, but I figured it would be too much.

    ---
    I have taken : Paxil, Lexapro, Xanax, Wellbutrin, and Lithium
    Currently: 450mg Eskalith CR (Lithium) and Wellbutrin

    I was mis-diagnosed for 3 years. They thought I had Generalized Anxiety Disorder with a Major Depressive Episode. The real problem was Bipolar Disorder.
    Quit Lexapro cold-turkey Dec 22, 2005.
    Ask me anything, nothing is off-limits.

  29. #29
    justwhatever is offline Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    133

    Default

    Shifty,

    you have a pregnancy fetish? thats kinda kinky



  30. #30
    WVU_Mountaineers is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    , , USA.
    Posts
    10

    Default

    quote:Originally posted by justwhatever

    Shifty,

    you have a pregnancy fetish? thats kinda kinky


    I don't know what he was thinking when he said that to you Sweetcheecks, It must've been the issue with his Bro, I am not into the pregnant thing, But if you do the rose peddle thing, And it doesn't work on him, well then, Call me!J/K, I know your expecting and I am not a home wrecker, but that just sounds SO GOOOD![}]
    I have been married now for 11 years, and after 4-5 years of wonderful "ANYTIME WE COULD" SEX, It has for some reason went to the birds, I have been turned down by my wife so much I refuse to make another move towards her "EVER" again.
    It gets to a man after so many turn downs! I know that does not say much for me, But every relationship I HAVE ever been in before this one was the same, GREAT TIMES! But then again, None of them lasted over 5 years either,lol.
    Goodluck SWEETCHEECKS! Try not to be offended by my "call me" remark, I was just getting a point across. That it is "not" you, It must have been a bad time for him.

    But I think that would be an awesome thing a woman could do for a man, Wish I could experience that someday again!
    Getting old sucks!
    DUE TIME I HOPE!
    ANY LADIES IN OHIO WITH A ROSE GARDEN? [}]




    Montani_semper_liberi "Mountaineers are always free"

Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22