[SickxRose]

My boyfriend has had an addiction to percocet for several years now (since before I met him). He started using it recreationally then had a severe back injury which worsened his dependency. He was taking massive amounts, I don't know the details but he'd take several 30s at a time. He came clean to me about the extent of his addiction recently, and I've since been helping him wean off them, but we discussed it today and he's decided to detox himself. He's currently taking as much as 100mg a day and all that does is make him not feel sick, so I know this is going to be a very hard road. I have a few questions specifically about this, but any general advice is more than welcome.
The plan he's currently considering is using xanax to try to keep himself sedated through the worst of the withdrawal. I've heard of methods like this, and I'm not concerned about him developing a dependency on xanax because he hates taking it.
Also, we are planning to sit down and have a long discussion about what I need to do and know and how I can help while he's going through this, as well as what not to do.
Also, just a little information about his personality, since that will probably help answer some of these questions. He's prideful, stubborn, a loving father, a kid at heart but a tough guy on the outside. He's highly loyal and highly protective. He had a difficult upbringing (drug addict parents, dropped out of high school, supported himself dealing drugs and other illegal activities for a while, all before I met him).

1) What do I need to watch out for physically? When is it bad enough to call a doctor or 911? I know the general symptoms of withdrawal such as chills, fever, sweats, and I know he'll be in pain. Anything else?

2) He does want me to be there with him, but he's also concerned because he's gone through detox before and actually frightened the person helping him. He does have a quick and sometimes violent temper normally and apparently it gets worse, how can I help him with that? what are things to say/not to say? Also how can I reassure him this is something I can handle? (BTW before anybody jumps to the wrong conclusion, he has NEVER been violent towards me, I know several of his exs and he's never been violent towards them either, however he is protective and can be quick to let something like a barfight escalate into a physical fight, or work out stress by punching a bag or sometimes a wall. that's what I mean when I say violent, NOT abusive!)

3) His suppliers also happen to be several of his best friends. They're people I know and like, and they're supportive of him wanting to get clean, but being around them is still going to be a huge temptation for him. How can we cope with this and lessen that temptation?


Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this and offer their advice. He's beat one addiction so far this year, he's been working and cleaning his life up, and I'm extremely proud of him. This is really the last major obstacle he has to beat to really turn his life around and I want to help in any way I can.

[htoth19]

There's a man here, Robert_325 and he's the guy you want to talk to. I'm sure he will reply to your post. He can tell you the best ways to taper your friend off the perc's. With little discomfort. He's helped a whole lot of people. Like hundreds worth. Stick around. He's going through some personal things right now, but he should be here soon.

~Heather

[SickxRose]

Thank you heather, I have seen his name mentioned. We've decided against tapering as it's too easy for him to start overusing again and it's way too expensive, he wants to do straight detox. (just wanted to clarify that) thanks for the reply!

[MaisieC]

Originally Posted by SickxRose

My boyfriend has had an addiction to percocet for several years now (since before I met him). He started using it recreationally then had a severe back injury which worsened his dependency. He was taking massive amounts, I don't know the details but he'd take several 30s at a time. He came clean to me about the extent of his addiction recently, and I've since been helping him wean off them, but we discussed it today and he's decided to detox himself. He's currently taking as much as 100mg a day and all that does is make him not feel sick, so I know this is going to be a very hard road. I have a few questions specifically about this, but any general advice is more than welcome.
The plan he's currently considering is using xanax to try to keep himself sedated through the worst of the withdrawal. I've heard of methods like this, and I'm not concerned about him developing a dependency on xanax because he hates taking it.
Also, we are planning to sit down and have a long discussion about what I need to do and know and how I can help while he's going through this, as well as what not to do.
Also, just a little information about his personality, since that will probably help answer some of these questions. He's prideful, stubborn, a loving father, a kid at heart but a tough guy on the outside. He's highly loyal and highly protective. He had a difficult upbringing (drug addict parents, dropped out of high school, supported himself dealing drugs and other illegal activities for a while, all before I met him).

1) What do I need to watch out for physically? When is it bad enough to call a doctor or 911? I know the general symptoms of withdrawal such as chills, fever, sweats, and I know he'll be in pain. Anything else?

2) He does want me to be there with him, but he's also concerned because he's gone through detox before and actually frightened the person helping him. He does have a quick and sometimes violent temper normally and apparently it gets worse, how can I help him with that? what are things to say/not to say? Also how can I reassure him this is something I can handle? (BTW before anybody jumps to the wrong conclusion, he has NEVER been violent towards me, I know several of his exs and he's never been violent towards them either, however he is protective and can be quick to let something like a barfight escalate into a physical fight, or work out stress by punching a bag or sometimes a wall. that's what I mean when I say violent, NOT abusive!)

3) His suppliers also happen to be several of his best friends. They're people I know and like, and they're supportive of him wanting to get clean, but being around them is still going to be a huge temptation for him. How can we cope with this and lessen that temptation?


Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this and offer their advice. He's beat one addiction so far this year, he's been working and cleaning his life up, and I'm extremely proud of him. This is really the last major obstacle he has to beat to really turn his life around and I want to help in any way I can.

Hi Rose,

You are a really nice girlfriend to want to help him through this. It IS going to be challenging, but people get through it all the time. He's lucky to have you supporting him!

I have to say I'm kind of worried about the notion of using xanax to "sedate" him through the detox period. Xanax is not a sedative; it's a short-acting anti-anxiety medication. It's perfectly appropriate to use it to control waves of anxiety that may arise during the detox, but it's not built to keep a person in a state of semi-sedation. You can keep it around and use it as needed, but it's very risky to try to stay at a level state of mellowness with it. It's easy to OD trying to use drugs that way.

In my experience, people who pop a lot of pills tend to labor under the delusion that they "know what they're doing." I had a dear friend once who was a heroin addict. She put herself through detoxes by gobbling up a bunch of benzos in addition to the various opiate pills she got her hands on. Sometimes she slept for 16 hours straight. The amount of ******** she took would have killed a person who wasn't a junkie. She thought it was funny, and she was convinced she knew what she was doing. Truth is she was very lucky. And one day she shot too much dope, thinking she knew what she was doing, and she died. So if the idea is that your boyfriend can ride out the detox in a semi-conscious state, I'd say that's a very bad idea. Xanax isn't built for that, and you guys don't know enough about how to manipulate it to make that work. Maybe your boyfriend thinks he does, but he doesn't.

One thing you should look into is the Thomas recipe for detox. It's a do-it-yourself combination of techniques, medications, and supplements that can make detox a little easier. You can find it by browsing around this site.

I know he wants to go cold turkey and get it over with, but really, the more he can taper down prior to doing c/t, the less sick he will be. Can he taper for a week or so, and ask you to hold the pills and control the dose? Less sick is a very good thing.

So withdrawal symptoms are a lot like a really nasty flu. You say you know he'll be in pain? He shouldn't be in pain from the withdrawal alone. Does he still have injuries that will cause him pain? Cuz the withdrawal alone will not do that. In terms of what to watch for, he's unlikely to go through anything that will require your calling 911. He's just going to feel mighty ************. Do make sure he doesn't get dehydrated. Gatorade is absolutely the best for that, because it contains electrolytes.

No one here can tell you what to say or not say if he's going to lose his temper. You know him, and there aren't any magic words to say to a detoxing addict. Just use your common sense and try to avoid provoking him; you know what kinds of things might make him mad. How can you reassure him you can handle it? CAN you handle it? Have you been exposed to him at his worst before? If not, are you really confident you can deal with his worst? Is he likely to yell at you or say nasty things? If you're concerned about it, maybe someone could come by and help you...someone else who knows him, or a family member or something. Just so it's not you alone with a foul-tempered detoxing addict.

The question of his suppliers being his best friends is really, really problematic. The reality is that a lot of drug-based friendships die when someone gets clean. It's too hard to be around the drugs if you've just got clean; the temptation is too much; your friends who are still using resent you and maybe try to sabotage you. It's too early to decide if he wants to keep those friendships, but unless and until those friends of his get clean, they're going to be a problem for him, and that's a fact. Very often our drug friends go when we get rid of our habit. You'll just have to see how things develop. But those friends of his are a relapse waiting to happen.

I hope this has helped some. Please keep posting and let us know how you do. Good luck!

Take care,
Maisie

[SickxRose]

I don't necessarily think the xanax idea is a great one, but he's pretty stubborn. As far as seeing him at his worse, we've been through hell and back on several things and I've given this a lot of thought, I wouldn't try if I couldn't handle it.
Yes the pain will be from his back injury, his back was broken and he has nerve damage.
thanks for the advice on the thompson method, I'll check it out, and the gatorade.

[TTTDogs]

Rose - hello - I just wanted to chime in and give some CT advice - I am on DAY 9 - free of drugs - after a 10 year - highly concentrated form of morphine/percocet addiction - and decided as you folks are doing to try CT and get it over with - I will be honest with you in saying it is tough - and will take every ounce of determination to get thru - BUT i AM LIVING PROOF - IT CAN BE DONE - I had the support of a wonderful husband - and that was about it - I am in Canada - and was unable to source any benzo;s or prescription sleep aids - so I was CT without benefits - so to speak - the good news is now that I am ON THE OTHER SIDE - I do not have to face ANY other taper / addiction issues - it will be tough - you need to get him thru DAY 3 - that was key to me - keep him moving - I found that being idle was the toughest - I even took long walks on days 2-3 and it helped immensely -baths are incredible - sPend the whole time in the bath if necessary - the is a detox guide called the Thomas Recipe - you can google - most swear by it - I did not have access to the ingredients - but look into that - and keep telloing him - you do not have to ever feel this way aagin - The pain WILL stop - IT WILL GET BEETER - HE WILL COME OUT THE OTHER SIDE - HANG IN THERE! I will check on you later

HUGS TTT

[SickxRose]

So far...well. I just don't know.

2 nights ago he couldn't get anything and spent the night laying on the floor sweating. He said he had nightmares about storms wiping out the earth. I was up most of the night keeping an eye on him so I fell asleep during the day, woke up and he was gone. We hadn't planned to start that soon exactly but I guess I'd hoped since he'd already gotten through that night he'd keep it up. He came home that night, seeming better, said he got a few small pills just to tide him over. Once again last night I was up all night trying to keep him comfortable, he left for the day. Today I woke up and immediately noticed $20 missing from my bedside table, got ahold of him and asked him if and why he took it and he said he was just going to get me cigarettes and brought the money back, but that of course led to a bit of a fight so he's gone again.

The thing that's making this hard is that it seems like he's only here to sleep and spends the rest of the time out somewhere else. This was the same behavior that led me to confront him a few weeks ago when he admitted he'd been staying distant because he didn't want me to know he was back on the pills.

There are other stressors in my life and I'm trying as hard as I can to keep those separate from this, but it's tough. I guess right now I'm just venting a little because i can't talk to him until he calms down and comes back (and I calm down as well).

BTW TTT thanks for the advice, and congratulations on 10 days now!