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 Good Morning.. Here I go again. So my bf gave me my last norco last night... I woke up about 2am and started to panic because I knew I had no more pills.. I took Henry's advice and imagined a big hand with a white glove in front of me, screaming STOP... It worked and I calmed myself down and went back to sleep. Then I woke up this morning, my eyes watering and my addicted mind was telling me, just call the dr. tell him you are still having pain and he'll give you another scrip.. Then the big hand screaming stop again.. I can do this.. After I settle myself down I realize it's not as bad as I make it out to be.. I know it's only been 12 hours but thats a long time for me.. I usually feel withdrawls 6hrs after my last dose. Yeah my back hurts a little but nothing a few asprin won't take care of.. And this time I don't feel so alone.. I have all of you wonderful people on this site to guide me and help me through the bad times.. So I'm at 12 hrs, not going to call the dr and I am going to attend the n/a meeting tonight no matter how bad I feel... I'm going to do it this time! Thank you all, you truly are an inspriation to me..
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12 hrs. behind you Hello & I will start by telling you you already proved you can do this. You have gone 12 yrs. & have taken advise from a wonderful person - Henry is "TOPS" in my book. (My book has 1/2 page of names)
I can not speak of meetings other than to warn you... I have had people ordered by court in cases I've worked to attend & by all means they were there just to stay out of jail. So there will most likely be people there with pills in their pockets looking for customers.. I do not want to discourage you from your plan just wanted to touch that & give you heads up on the temptations you might face there.
Me personally could not go to a meeting & talk about what has had a grip on me because the more I would talk the more I would WANT...
Meetings have helped many people they just weren't for me.
I can tell you with 12 yrs behind you & your drug of choice you have this beat already because your listening to someone that has helped me & is a true friend & knows his stuff. Do not jump from him to others that might want to tell you other ways of doing this.
When you wake up in bad shape I have found that laying very still even when you think impossible lay there & control your breathing & slow it down to the point you get control of the panic feelings & your breathing is key.
I admire your efforts before your life ends up where most does INCLUDING my own. Stop digging your grave now - I too started with Norco & all you have to do is do a quick search on my posts & you will see how bad things get fast if you allow them.
I'm here for you if you have any ?'s
Good luck
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Congrats to you MSWRLD . The hardest part is the first day. Now take it an hour at a time if you must. Soon you will be saying TWO DAYS , THREE DAYS etc.etc.. Its been seven years for me , on and off and mostly on. If your really sick of it you can do it. Each time we relapse we learn a little bit more about our addiction. What helps me is to keep my eye on the PRIZE. The Prize for me is FREEDOM. It means so much to me to be free. Remember if you can how you used to be before narcotics. Clear thinking , full of your own energy, happy , witty , ambitious. You get the picture. We did these things without narcotics. The drugs cloud all that and makes it seem like we have always been this way. Stay the course , the PRIZE is too great. Its so doable , if we finally have our minds into it. Peace
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Happy Friday Mswrld!!!
That's the spirit!!! You rock!!! Awesome!!!
12 hours is huge! It may not seem like much but it is one heck of a great start! After the first hour the second comes and you stay to yourself I made it one hour and I can’t go back now otherwise that 1 hour was for nothing. After two going on three you say the same thing that if you go back the first two hours was for nothing so you progress forward. Now look at you! Over 12 hours and actually closer to and closing in on 24 hours! WAY TO GO Ms Mswrld!!! Always tell yourself that no matter how you may feel that it won’t kill you to detox. The anxiety, the depression, the aches and pains are all just the bad guys (I always call addiction bad guys) fighting to get you back under their control. Hey after all they are fighting for their own lives too you know. You are defeating the addiction. You are killing the bad guys and where else can you take out bad guys and it be legal, have no repercussions, be morally correct, politically correct, ethically correct, you can brag about it and not be looked down upon, scream it from the highest mountain, congratulated and so much more and not get in trouble for it? How cool is that?  That police man with the white gloves on and his hand put up in front of you and you imagining you hearing his shrill whistle blowing and the loud command of “STOP” really does help as silly as it may sound. Each time a negative thought starts to creep into your mind and you start doubting or worrying you put that hand up and yell “STOP”! Then for a brief moment you imagine something else. It can be anything as long as it is positive. Perhaps a quick scene of a beach in Tahiti, a quick remembrance of something fun or funny perhaps as you were growing up as a child where you witnessed something super funny like maybe a parent having ice-cream with you and as they lick the ice cream on the cone the ball of ice cream falls on their lap. A little puppy with big floppy ears running and watching the big ears flopping all over the place. Anything as long as it is positive. You hear many times of people talking about a special and secret safe place that only you know about. If you feel comfortable and safe there and you have one then imagine you being right there for just a couple seconds. Anything positive as long as it breaks that chain of negative thought. Welcome to the world of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I always talk about it because it uses rhyme and reason, common sense and logic. You learn to not generalize, over exaggerate; thinking in negatives, responding in positives, when negatives come along you put a “stop” to it. Your brain is an amazing thing and as goofy as it may sound it learns even from these simple thing and it sends commands to your body accordingly. For that brief few seconds your heart rates slows, your breathing becomes deeper and fuller, your blood pressure drops, you warm up because blood is flowing again as the adrenaline is toning down from that fight or flight syndrome. Everything and it all starts right where you were.
You took your last Norco last night. You made it past 12 hours without one! That is fantastic!!! The half life on average of Norco’s is about 3 to 6 hours depending on the individual, their metabolic rates and other factors but as you close in on that 24 hour mark the vast majority of it is out of your system and there are only trace elements in there.
It is perfectly normal to feel depressed and you WILL have bouts of anxiety that seem to pop in and out of it’s own free will. I always said that during any detox that the bad guys will throw everything at you to try and keep you hooked. One will sit on each shoulder and whisper in your ear “come on just one more! What’s it going to hurt! I can make you feel much better and besides it is only just one! No big deal really and you can always detox later if you want but for now just one!” You know what? You didn’t listen and for once in your life not listening is a good thing! Another “how cool is that eh?”  The reason I bring up these little things is I am trying to show you that although the bad guys us psych warfare on you well you too can use it on them. After all you are a much better warrior than they ever hope to be. They know it too which is why the will even throw the kitchen sink at you if they could just to keep you in their grasp. They play mind games as well as physical. Ever wake up in the middle of the night and it is so quite? Perhaps you hear someone snoring? A clock ticking? The wind outside blowing? A car driving down the street? You feel all alone. Scared, frightened, panic stricken? You wonder if you will ever be free from all these horrible nightmares right? You desperately want to talk to someone. Someone but you don’t want to wake anyone for many reasons. Embarrassment turns to disgust which turns to sorrow. You quietly weep. Tears flow and you bury your face into the pillow and wish….you wish so hard that it would all just stop and go away. Morning eventually comes and you are tired. You feel like a walking zombie. You might be hungry but if food is in front of you then you just don’t feel like eating. You want company yet when people are around you don’t feel a connection no matter who it is and in a way want to be left alone. You can’t think of anything pleasant to do and you just want to crawl back in bed. Maybe you do and you get in there only to toss and turn and get frustrated. This cycle repeats itself many times then one day or night something happens. Something snaps on like a light switch. You feel your heart pounding, your breathing gets rapid and shallow and you start panting. Beads of perspiration start to form here and there. Fear! You are becoming terrified and all the horrible “what if’s” start to manifest itself! You get to the point you just want to run down the street screaming but you don’t. What is happening? Meanwhile that bad guy on your shoulder is still there. Speaking of which did you ever see what that bad guy looks like? He has horns, a spiked tail, carries a pitchfork, has a cape, and is colored all red.
All in all the cycle of high anxiety combined with hopeless depression manifests itself in you. It hits without warning. So much is going on but remember….always remember that “STOP”!!! You just need to break that chain of negativity even if it is only for a few seconds. You are very intelligent and you know better but it is your emotions that are ruling you at certain times. So you command with that “STOP” and soon enough your subconscious learns and once it trains itself it will stop those thoughts automatically but it takes a while before you learn that. You can’t do it a couple times and have it work but consistency is key. You apply this cognitive behavior techniques to everything in varying formats. You are learning to live life again without addictive substances. Hey you made it this far right and nothing bad happened. You may feel terrible but there is a reason for that and it is called withdrawal. So there is that bonafide reason and since you know what it is you deal with it and move on. Don’t dwell in it. There are many things you can actively do to help with withdrawal symptoms that really work. If one doesn’t then we try to find one that does and you WILL find something that does work. Everyone is different and that is why what works for one may not work for you and vice versa but we just don’t give up. We keep working at it till we mold the process to be just right for just you and you only.
You have a wonderful and caring boyfriend. You are very lucky. He in turn is very lucky to have you. “Yeah right” you say? If you feel that way then let me ask you this. Why are you so intent on coming clean then? You are a winner Mswrld and don’t let anyone tell you different. If they do then they are no better than that little stinker that is sitting on your shoulder telling you all that negative garbage. You don’t need a negative person in your life and you sure as heck don’t need those negative bad guys. Go with the winners. Go with positive people. You are trying to get clean because you are a positive person. You want to make a positive impact not just for yourself but for your boyfriend, your family, your future. He is helping you in turn because he cares about you.
When we detox from our DOC we have tendencies to think in negative terms. If you ask yourself why the most likely answer is “I don’t know”. All you see are stressors all around you. Family, job, money, more substances, bills, everything. Now if you make a list and put all the negatives on one side and the other put all positives using only rational, logical and true positives you will see that you can come up with far more positives than negatives. Just the fact you are here on the forum shows a positive.
I know I talk to much, some are out there laughing saying “ya think!” LOL!, but funny as this may sound right now that is what you need. You are filled up with negative thoughts and emotions and just venting isn’t cutting it is it? It helps but just doesn’t quite make it.
Keep posting and do what I call “discussing it out”. It’s called desensitization.
Looking forward to hearing from you as all of us are.
Hey you have quite a cheering section here you know. Everyone here has gone through or are going through something. So many people combined is a tremendous amount of knowledge and experience and combine that with compassion and caring and you are now part of our family!
Henry
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I'm such a dork! Put on my make-up, fixed my hair, got out of my pjs and drove to my first N/A meeting.. Wasn't feeling very well when I got there but I forced myself to get out of the car and walk in.. It wasn't long before I realized it was a Spanish speaking meeting... lol.. So I will be attending my first english speaking meeting tomorrow night at 7...
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 Originally Posted by HenryNCBA  Happy Friday Mswrld!!!
That's the spirit!!! You rock!!! Awesome!!!
12 hours is huge! It may not seem like much but it is one heck of a great start! After the first hour the second comes and you stay to yourself I made it one hour and I can’t go back now otherwise that 1 hour was for nothing. After two going on three you say the same thing that if you go back the first two hours was for nothing so you progress forward. Now look at you! Over 12 hours and actually closer to and closing in on 24 hours! WAY TO GO Ms Mswrld!!! Always tell yourself that no matter how you may feel that it won’t kill you to detox. The anxiety, the depression, the aches and pains are all just the bad guys (I always call addiction bad guys) fighting to get you back under their control. Hey after all they are fighting for their own lives too you know. You are defeating the addiction. You are killing the bad guys and where else can you take out bad guys and it be legal, have no repercussions, be morally correct, politically correct, ethically correct, you can brag about it and not be looked down upon, scream it from the highest mountain, congratulated and so much more and not get in trouble for it? How cool is that? That police man with the white gloves on and his hand put up in front of you and you imagining you hearing his shrill whistle blowing and the loud command of “STOP” really does help as silly as it may sound. Each time a negative thought starts to creep into your mind and you start doubting or worrying you put that hand up and yell “STOP”! Then for a brief moment you imagine something else. It can be anything as long as it is positive. Perhaps a quick scene of a beach in Tahiti, a quick remembrance of something fun or funny perhaps as you were growing up as a child where you witnessed something super funny like maybe a parent having ice-cream with you and as they lick the ice cream on the cone the ball of ice cream falls on their lap. A little puppy with big floppy ears running and watching the big ears flopping all over the place. Anything as long as it is positive. You hear many times of people talking about a special and secret safe place that only you know about. If you feel comfortable and safe there and you have one then imagine you being right there for just a couple seconds. Anything positive as long as it breaks that chain of negative thought. Welcome to the world of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I always talk about it because it uses rhyme and reason, common sense and logic. You learn to not generalize, over exaggerate; thinking in negatives, responding in positives, when negatives come along you put a “stop” to it. Your brain is an amazing thing and as goofy as it may sound it learns even from these simple thing and it sends commands to your body accordingly. For that brief few seconds your heart rates slows, your breathing becomes deeper and fuller, your blood pressure drops, you warm up because blood is flowing again as the adrenaline is toning down from that fight or flight syndrome. Everything and it all starts right where you were.
You took your last Norco last night. You made it past 12 hours without one! That is fantastic!!! The half life on average of Norco’s is about 3 to 6 hours depending on the individual, their metabolic rates and other factors but as you close in on that 24 hour mark the vast majority of it is out of your system and there are only trace elements in there.
It is perfectly normal to feel depressed and you WILL have bouts of anxiety that seem to pop in and out of it’s own free will. I always said that during any detox that the bad guys will throw everything at you to try and keep you hooked. One will sit on each shoulder and whisper in your ear “come on just one more! What’s it going to hurt! I can make you feel much better and besides it is only just one! No big deal really and you can always detox later if you want but for now just one!” You know what? You didn’t listen and for once in your life not listening is a good thing! Another “how cool is that eh?” The reason I bring up these little things is I am trying to show you that although the bad guys us psych warfare on you well you too can use it on them. After all you are a much better warrior than they ever hope to be. They know it too which is why the will even throw the kitchen sink at you if they could just to keep you in their grasp. They play mind games as well as physical. Ever wake up in the middle of the night and it is so quite? Perhaps you hear someone snoring? A clock ticking? The wind outside blowing? A car driving down the street? You feel all alone. Scared, frightened, panic stricken? You wonder if you will ever be free from all these horrible nightmares right? You desperately want to talk to someone. Someone but you don’t want to wake anyone for many reasons. Embarrassment turns to disgust which turns to sorrow. You quietly weep. Tears flow and you bury your face into the pillow and wish….you wish so hard that it would all just stop and go away. Morning eventually comes and you are tired. You feel like a walking zombie. You might be hungry but if food is in front of you then you just don’t feel like eating. You want company yet when people are around you don’t feel a connection no matter who it is and in a way want to be left alone. You can’t think of anything pleasant to do and you just want to crawl back in bed. Maybe you do and you get in there only to toss and turn and get frustrated. This cycle repeats itself many times then one day or night something happens. Something snaps on like a light switch. You feel your heart pounding, your breathing gets rapid and shallow and you start panting. Beads of perspiration start to form here and there. Fear! You are becoming terrified and all the horrible “what if’s” start to manifest itself! You get to the point you just want to run down the street screaming but you don’t. What is happening? Meanwhile that bad guy on your shoulder is still there. Speaking of which did you ever see what that bad guy looks like? He has horns, a spiked tail, carries a pitchfork, has a cape, and is colored all red.
All in all the cycle of high anxiety combined with hopeless depression manifests itself in you. It hits without warning. So much is going on but remember….always remember that “STOP”!!! You just need to break that chain of negativity even if it is only for a few seconds. You are very intelligent and you know better but it is your emotions that are ruling you at certain times. So you command with that “STOP” and soon enough your subconscious learns and once it trains itself it will stop those thoughts automatically but it takes a while before you learn that. You can’t do it a couple times and have it work but consistency is key. You apply this cognitive behavior techniques to everything in varying formats. You are learning to live life again without addictive substances. Hey you made it this far right and nothing bad happened. You may feel terrible but there is a reason for that and it is called withdrawal. So there is that bonafide reason and since you know what it is you deal with it and move on. Don’t dwell in it. There are many things you can actively do to help with withdrawal symptoms that really work. If one doesn’t then we try to find one that does and you WILL find something that does work. Everyone is different and that is why what works for one may not work for you and vice versa but we just don’t give up. We keep working at it till we mold the process to be just right for just you and you only.
You have a wonderful and caring boyfriend. You are very lucky. He in turn is very lucky to have you. “Yeah right” you say? If you feel that way then let me ask you this. Why are you so intent on coming clean then? You are a winner Mswrld and don’t let anyone tell you different. If they do then they are no better than that little stinker that is sitting on your shoulder telling you all that negative garbage. You don’t need a negative person in your life and you sure as heck don’t need those negative bad guys. Go with the winners. Go with positive people. You are trying to get clean because you are a positive person. You want to make a positive impact not just for yourself but for your boyfriend, your family, your future. He is helping you in turn because he cares about you.
When we detox from our DOC we have tendencies to think in negative terms. If you ask yourself why the most likely answer is “I don’t know”. All you see are stressors all around you. Family, job, money, more substances, bills, everything. Now if you make a list and put all the negatives on one side and the other put all positives using only rational, logical and true positives you will see that you can come up with far more positives than negatives. Just the fact you are here on the forum shows a positive.
I know I talk to much, some are out there laughing saying “ya think!” LOL!, but funny as this may sound right now that is what you need. You are filled up with negative thoughts and emotions and just venting isn’t cutting it is it? It helps but just doesn’t quite make it.
Keep posting and do what I call “discussing it out”. It’s called desensitization.
Looking forward to hearing from you as all of us are.
Hey you have quite a cheering section here you know. Everyone here has gone through or are going through something. So many people combined is a tremendous amount of knowledge and experience and combine that with compassion and caring and you are now part of our family!
Henry Henry you are so awesome! There are no words to express how much your post mean to me.. They help so much and are part of what keeps me going.. Thank you so much..
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Originally Posted by Denny_D Hello mswrld .... I just wanted to say greetings to you and stop by and let you know that I received your very nice "hello" on the thread of "mindime". So I came over to your thread to respond to you! You had some very nice thngs to say about me and I appreciate them very much so thank you!
I am so impressed by your now many hours of clean time! That is really awesome to say the least! I am just very proud of you! The others have all given you many thngs that you can do to help with those wonderful withdrawals. 
Like Henry showed you the mind is a very powerful thing and I firmly believe that you can make or force yourself to believe what you really what to believe. In other words you can help yourself along by believing that the symptoms are actually not as bad as they really may be. Just try to remain as positive in your thoughts and actions as you can ok? That really helps so much.
That is completely awesome about the big hand with the white glove getting you to just stop in your tracks and get back to sleep! Whatever it takes to get you not to think about it and better yet not ever use again is the way to go of course. If I can be of any help them you just let me know ok? I'll keep checking on you and I certainly wish you the very best as you continue to add to your already impressive clean time! God Bless....Denny Thanks Denny.. I only wish I could have been as strong as you and rejected the script of norco after my last sugery.. But I'm dealing with the pain now (which isnt that bad) just taking advil and all the vitamins listed on the thomas recepie. I don't know what I would do without this site.. It is so very helpful..
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Originally Posted by mswrld Thanks Denny.. I only wish I could have been as strong as you and rejected the script of norco after my last surgery.. But I'm dealing with the pain now (which isn't that bad) just taking advil and all the vitamins listed on the Thomas recipe. I don't know what I would do without this site.. It is so very helpful.. The Thomas Recipe does provide you with many vitamins and minerals and also supplements that all are a large help with the withdrawal symptoms. But strictly for pain, I use this natural supplement by the name of D-Phenylalanine. I have used it for a while now and I just could not have gotten through those last surgeries without it! It works in the same way as the narcotics and opiates do by attaching itself to the same receptors in the brain that produce the feel-good sensations.
It is very hard to find at most vitamin or natural supplement stores at this time, but you can order it through several places on the net including Amazon.com. I take 1 or 2 500 mg capsules usually 2 times per day.
If you decide to give it a try you should of course always check with and ask your own personal physician about it. It may or may not be right for you, but you should always ask your doctor first before taking any supplement or vitamin recommended here for health concerns!
With that said you want to make certain that you get the actual "D" variety of this supplement. There is also available L=Phenylalanine, DL-Phenylalanine, and the other variety which is DLPA. These all are NOT the same as the one you want by the name of D-Phenylalanine. This one is strickly for the use of pain control and works excellent in my opinion! Like I said, it was the one thing that got me through those last 5 surgeries of mine without taking the actual narcotics or opiates.
Let me know if you decide to give it a try and if you have any trouble finding it ok? I can and will give you some other suggestions as to where you may find it. I wish you the very best in your recovery efforts and if I can be of any help then please just let me know. God Bless....Denny
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Oh my, and here comes the night.. I pray that I will be able to get a least a lil sleep. Thank God I have lots of movies recored.. Does anyone know how much melatonin I can safely take?
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Originally Posted by mswrld Oh my, and here comes the night.. I pray that I will be able to get a least a lil sleep. Thank God I have lots of movies recored.. Does anyone know how much melatonin I can safely take? It comes in 3 mg, 5 mg, and also 10 mg and I myself take (2) - 3 mg tablets about 1/2 hour before bedtime! Check the directions on the bottle you have please! God Bless....Denny
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Dreams about drugs?????????? When I finally fall asleep I am tortured by dreams about drugs.. In my dreams I'm counting my pills and swallowing them as fast as I can count them.. I also dream about going to buy them.. I hate these dreams, I don't get much sleep anyway and then when I do, I dream about drugs.. I'm hopeless
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Mswrld , you are no way hopeless. You are in day 4 C.T. is that right? Not sure what your dose was or anything. I didnt see any info in this thread. Any way what is important is that you are taking control. You might be hurting and feel horrible but your still better off then you were before you stopped. The prize is Freedom . Save your life. Keep going forward not back. In 3 or 4 days you will start to feel more clear headed . You will start to have positive thoughts. They will come and go for a week or so. Then they will come more and more , till one day you realize your feeling like you did before you knew about pills. Then your sleep will return to normal and there you have it. FREEDOM
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Mswrld it might be I was going to post my experience with meletonine but didn't want to scare you off from using it but while I used it for awhile I had some of the craziest dreams & then stopped taking it @ bedtime & those dreams stopped.
Everyone is different & reacts differently from these chemicals but try a few nights with out it & see if it helps
Good luck
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Originally Posted by disabledleo I was going to post my experience with meletonine but didn't want to scare you off from using it but while I used it for awhile I had some of the craziest dreams & then stopped taking it @ bedtime & those dreams stopped.
Everyone is different & reacts differently from these chemicals but try a few nights with out it & see if it helps
Good luck Thanks.. I will try to get some sleep without them tonight.. I hate dreaming about drugs
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